Season 1 was promoted with an image of Tracey Ullman's tongue tattooed with the American flag. Episode 1 was premiered two weeks early through digital cable television's onDemand service. A total of 35 characters were performed by Ullman in this season.
March 30, 2008
Sindra wakes up for work. Marion checks in on her patient. Linda gives the morning news. Stacey Harris discusses her and her husband's farm, and their quest to find an alternative fuel, to get America off foreign oil. Laurie David talks to her publicist about Al Gore. Arianna talks about Rudy Giuliani's hair, and takes a phone call to discuss her thoughts regarding the Zsa Zsa and Eva Gabor movie script. Nancy Pelosi gets Botox injections. Irma discusses restless leg syndrome, with her neighbor. Padma gets held up. Tony Sirico interviews at a press junket for his new film, "I Married This Inuit". Gretchen Pincus gives her story to a ghost writer who's writing her autobiography. Rita Cosby reports from the lethal injection room where Gretchen Pincus' fiancé, "The Wetwipe Killer", is to be executed. David Beckham talks to his agent. News reporter Campbell Brown gives the public its nightly terror report. Sally Knox has an affair with her boss. Dina Lohan learns of Lindsay Lohan's engagement in a club with other parents of young Hollywood celebrities. Sindra returns home.
April 6, 2008
County hospital ambulance dumps woman out into the street. Linda wants to follow the "patient dumping" story and reads report on Angelina Jolie. Chanel does medical body scans. Laurie David discusses her eco-friendly private plane. Staff Sgt. Lisa Penning returns home from Iraq to visit her son. Arianna chooses dress for the Worldwide Blog Awards. Padma adds a Bollywood twist on erectile dysfunction. Renée Zellweger is on a press junket for her new movie, "Home Frontal Lobe". Irma talks about the "Super Bug". David Beckham has a press conference. Campbell Brown has a nightly news report of terror. Arianna is at the "Bloggies". Dina Lohan discusses Joy Fanning, mother of Dakota. Carmen gets interviewed by news crew.
April 13, 2008
Mother Superior Rose Pannatella meditates. Linda reports on the alarm clock recall. Chandra talks yoga unions. Arianna's housekeeper gets stranded, leaving Arianna to do housework. Malawian star, Asmaa Qasim, comes to America to adopt a child. Laurie has her pilot dump their jet fuel over Nebraska. Irma gets hit by Laurie's jet fuel. Padma sings about Bipolar disorder medication. Sherilynne participates in the "Walk A Mile In Their Shoes" program, dressing as a Muslim. Dame Judi Dench talks about her new film. Campbell Brown reports. Sandra rallies her team. Sally Knox and her boss discuss their lives. David Beckham gets ready for a dinner party, with the creator of, Lost. Dina Lohan is informed that her daughter has died. Arianna blogs about her day. Dale and Asmaa head to Malawi.
April 20, 2008
America's imports/exports for the day. "Mutiny" on a JetBlue plane. Chanel confiscates "pilot killers". Mary Ann LeFrank, gets her ultrasound. Laurie David's publicist can't find the toilet. David Beckham returns from a child's birthday party. Andy Rooney delivers his piece on pencils. Cameron Diaz in, "That Terrible Time Of The Month". Mary Ann's water breaks. Campbell Brown reports. Annette Thomas returns to the stage -- almost. Ronnie Rooney dies during, "Chicago". Sally Knox and her boss decide to leave their spouses. Mary Ann gives birth. Arianna blogs about Andy Rooney and Mary Ann LeFrak. The fate of Mary Ann's offspring.
April 27, 2008
Rose questions God being too PC. Marion arrives for work. Doris is held up for smuggling at the border. Sally learns that Chris has not left his wife. Russian translator. Rita Cosby arrives at the scene of crime. Abbey Melina Harris advertises for Dignity Village. Chanel reveals everything she’s confiscated. Suzanne Somers plugs her new “Vagisizer”. Dame Helen Mirren discusses her new film, “Fish Out Those Old Teats”. Padma tries to help a customer remove her Vagisizer. David Beckham injures himself. Marion awaits the coroner.
Ullman performs a total of 52 characters this season.
April 12, 2009
Linda Alvarez discusses budgeting your money. Laura Bush wakes up in Crawford, Texas. Dee and Candy discuss passengers and Candy's fertility problem. Heather Mills' reality show. Chanel performs a scan on, Candy. Padma explains the "American spirit", to Pudit. Arianna talks to President Barack Obama. Laura gets ready for the garage sale. Celine Dion returns to the damage caused by Hurricane Katrina three years later, while giving an interview to, Larry King. Campbell Brown reports on the missing White House objects. A woman gets stuck in a tiny car. Dee comforts, Candy. Laura talks to George in bed.
April 19, 2009
The FLDS wives, say goodbye to their children who are being taken away by authorities. Rose is startled by the resemblance of her missionary to that of the FLDS. Linda reports about the polygamist compound and a polygamist family living in Buffalo, New York. Dee and Candy dispose and deal with ejaculate. Wendy Trenton wins a hog calling competition. Lunchtime at the compound. Renee Zellweger rehearses for the Broadway musical, “Seven Brides For Every Brother”. Tony Sirico gets an audition for the musical. Donna Karen redesigns the robes of the members of the Supreme Court. Tony Sirico auditions. Campbell Brown reports the latest on the FLDS case. Miuccia Prada rolls out her polygamist inspired fashion line. Arianna considers investing in the “Seven Brides For Every Brother” musical. Wendy is pulled over by a police officer. Laura Bush talks on the phone. Every child returns to the ranch, all except one.
April 26, 2009
Linda announces the arrival of author, JK Rowling, who's coming to kick off her American Litigation Tour. Lynne Garibaldi, begs JK to intervene on her son's behalf. JK arrives in America. Chanel performs a Harry Potter search on a child. JK closes down a Harry Potter-inspired ride at a potato festival. Laura Bush returns home from her "Fact Finding Mission". Renee gets interviewed for her new film, "The World Is Not Magical, The World Is Absolute Shitte", a film based on the life of, JK Rowling. JK files a lawsuit against a preschool. Grammy Cyrus sings to Miley. Dina Lohan pitches a reality show. Campbell Brown reports on all the lawsuits filed by JK that day. Dina and Ali see Daniel Radcliffe in Equus. JK tries suing a homeless man. Dee highlights Candy's hair. JK flies home.
May 3, 2009
Rose is proud that America elected its first African-American President. Linda gets attacked by a bee. Penny speaks to a client. Ingrid visits a doctor. Chanel re-acts the dance moves she did in rap music videos to a co-worker. The Dalai Lama holds a press conference. Padma sets up an appointment for, Ingrid, with her brother. Lynne converts. Tom Brokaw discusses retirement. Ingrid, talks to her husband. The Dalai Lama performs on Dancing With The Stars. The game show, "So You Think You Can Die", films. Linda checks out her clip on Youtube.
May 10, 2009
Natural food workers put organic stickers on fruit. Linda reports on a wrecking crane accident. Ingrid returns from India. Candy deals with an overweight passenger. Sargent Lisa Penning is back home with her son. Asmaa Qasim holds a press conference. Dina Lohan films her reality show. Lisa meets with a loan officer. An over-enthusiastic soccer mom, cheers her daughter's team. Tom Brokaw reports. A Cirque du Soleil performer prepares for a performance. Vanessa Pludd, hits the slot machines. An accident occurs on Dancing With The Stars. Lisa sets fire to her house.
May 17, 2009
"Rush hour" for America's illegal immigrant population crossing the Mexico/Texas border. A mother tries to get her teenage daughter to breastfed her baby. A dog walker is attacked. Two lesbians prepare to tie the knot. A museum in Honolulu gets a painting donated to them by Jack Lord's daughter. Rachel Ludlow's mother flies in for the wedding. Padma, receives a letter from her family in India, trying to arrange a marriage for her. Gretchen signs copies of her book, "White Widow". Rachel, learns that she's been dumped at the altar. Seth Rogan's press junket for his new movie, "Kink-Haired Ass Cheeks". Jonah Hill crashes Seth's interview. Rachel catches up with her girlfriend. A lounge singer performs a crazy dedication to her late singing partner. Illegal immigrants flee back across the border. A grandmother breastfeeds her teenage daughter's baby, and her teenage daughter.
May 24, 2009
A man decides to commit suicide. Chanel celebrates President Obama. A pediatrician over-prescribes a child. A senior citizen, and former performer, prepares for a visit from her family. Lynne, explains re-enacting. An Olympic trainer likes them young. A wealthy woman talks to her therapist. Valerie Frumkiss, is still waiting for her family. A teacher seduces a student. Jodie Foster, talks about her new film, "SpongeMom Pantsuit". Robin Cavanaugh, comforts her daughter. Valerie, is still waiting for her family to visit. Robin's husband returns home.
Ruth Madoff has downsized. Bernie wakes up in prison. Chanel has a Michael Jackson dance off. Vicky agrees to be in a documentary about internet addiction. Carol shows off her denim company to a new worker. Romona gets stuck on the highway. Penélope Cruz discusses her new film. Vicky's family has an intervention. Campbell Brown reports on a Bernie Madoff book. Make-up room at "The Rachel Maddow Show". Bernie Madoff is added to a Holocaust museum. Vicky's in a rehabilitation center.
February 1, 2010
Patty Sue takes a call from an Indian customer. Linda Alvarez discusses Candy Spelling. Emily tries to get a job interview. Angela Suleman decides to go for a walk. An out of work soldier, tries to find work. Candy Spelling interviews. Angela continues her walk. Padma Perkesh does a tribute to "Slumdog Millionaire". Matthew McConaughey is interviewed about his new film. Campbell Brown reports. A Jewish internet dating agency date. Angela finds the eighth child.
February 8, 2010
A woman drops off her son at a wilderness boot camp. Sonia Sotomayor. Polly checks the microphones. Chanel changes her body check procedures. Tennis instructor. Padma dances. A woman talks about her encounter with actor, Sacha Baron Cohen. Jacqueline Lord talks about the Birther movement. Campbell Brown. Dee and Candy reminisce. Kurt has broken out of the wilderness boot camp.
February 15, 2010
A scientist clones Rupert Murdoch. Green collar workers. Dee and Candy spray down the passengers. Ramona's airbag deploys. Marion looks through Bernie Madoff's hate mail. Debbie Rowe. Graceland souvenir shop. Bookstore owner. Antiques Roadshow. Marion helps Mrs. Katzman pack. Patty Sue takes a call.
February 22, 2010
Gretchen gets more supplies for her Meth lab. Linda steps out for a smoke. Janice gets harassed for smoking. Tina Luffler is found after going missing since 1972. A rich woman hides her purchases due to the recession. Susan Boyle. Gretchen calls it a day. Carla Bruni visits Michelle Obama, and writes her a song. Chanel is getting commended. Gretchen is helicoptered to a burn unit.
March 1, 2010
Whale volunteers. Linda talks about Jennifer Aniston. 9/11 press conference. Overweight woman talks about laziness. Simona visits her brother, Simon. Vocal coach. Chanel deals with an animal smugular. Campbell Brown. Christiane reports. Kate Winslet interview. Hudson moves.
March 8, 2010
A couple refuses to vacate a rundown McMansion. Linda Alvarez reports the Winter Olympics. Vendor, Vera Wilson, arrives at the gun fair. Caroline Kennedy visits her therapist. Zoey is still enjoying poverty. Vera's cash and carry is brisk. "CSI" wannabe. Caroline calls in a favor. Ingrid's children have moved back home. Antiques Roadshow. Campbell Brown. Chanel confiscates tweezers. Vera has a "Second Amendment" emergency.