Dude, Where's My Ranch?

"Dude, Where's My Ranch?"
The Simpsons episode
File:EABF13.jpg
Episode no.	Season 14
Directed by	Chris Clements
Written by	Ian Maxtone-Graham
Original air dates	April 27, 2003
Episode features
Chalkboard gag	None.
Couch gag	The family mimes sitting on a couch in the living room.

"Dude, Where's My Ranch?" is the eighteenth episode of The Simpsons' fourteenth season. The episode aired on April 27, 2003.

Synopsis

When the family does Christmas carols, they sing songs, until they reach the Pasty-Faced Lawyer's house. He tells the family that they cannot sing Christmas carols, unless they pay a royalty. In response, Homer makes the lyrics for his own Christmas carol. Later, Ned Flanders comes in and tries to help Homer, until Homer kicks him out. Homer finds new inspiration in an anti-Flanders song, "Everybody Hates Ned Flanders." He plays the song at Moe's, and when David Byrne comes in, he likes the song so much, that he wants to produce and record the song. "Everybody Hates Ned Flanders" becomes so popular that even William Shatner does a cover of it. This leads to mass publicity, which annoys the Simpsons, who want to avoid it. They find a brochure for a dude ranch, the Lazy I Ranch, and go there.

The family arrives at the Lazy I Ranch, owned by the Rich Texan, who tells Lisa that the ranch was built on cruelty to animals and oppression of indigenous people, which annoys her. It wants to make her leave, until she meets a cowhand, named Luke Stetson, who shares her views on the ranch. Homer and Bart also have their own adventure when they meet a tribe of Native Americans who want a dam removed so they can reclaim their land. They are confronted by beavers, but manage to battle them back, destroy the dam, and reclaim the Native Americans' land. Meanwhile, Lisa thinks that Luke is off-limits, because she overhears him on the phone, promising a first dance to a girl, named Clara. When Lisa encounters her, she tricks her into going the wrong way. At the dance, Lisa finds out that Clara is Luke's sister. It's up to Lisa, Bart, and some surprising heroes—beavers—to save Clara. However, when Lisa comes clean, Luke is offended and they separate. As the Simpsons return to Springfield, they hear a self-deprecating cover version of the Andrea True Connection song, "More, More, More," on the radio, sung by Moe and produced by David Byrne, and turn around to spend another week at the ranch.

Trivia

• When the Simpson family is told that they must pay royalties in order to sing Christmas carols, Marge protests that they belong to everyone, "like grapes at the grocery store," a reference to the episode Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment, where Lisa guilts Marge into charging herself for eating two grapes from a bunch she did not intend to buy.
• The character of Cleanie was styled after the Lord of the Rings character Gollum, from his appearance to the way he said "My preciousss.... Gollum!". Andy Serkis, who provided the voice of Cleanie, played the character of Gollum in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy

Goofs

• Lisa exclaims "Oh...I had my first crush, and he broke my heart", but Lisa had several crushes, including Mr. Bergstrom, Nelson Muntz, and the Cory boys.
• The Family originally goes to the dude ranch to get away from radio and T.V., but later in the episode, Maggie is seen dancing to "Oops!...I Did It Again" by Britney Spears.

Quotes

• Cleanie: (a'la Gollum) My precious!
• Moe: Moe, Moe, Moe,
  How do ya like me, how do ya like me
  Moe, Moe, Moe,
  Why don't ya like me, nobody likes me
• David Byrne: Can you drive me to the hospital?
  Moe: Sure, pal.
  (they drive past it)
  David: Wasn't that the hospital?
  Moe: (presses a button on the dashboard, causing the roof to come on) Uh, ya ever see the movie Misery?
  David: Actually no.
  Moe: Then this will all be new to ya.
  (they drive off with suspense music)
• Homer: Ya know, a lot can happen when you're looking the other way.
  Marge: You're telling me!
  (points to a tombstone that says "Cookie: 1912-Today")
  (NOTE: this exchange was only in the first showing and was never seen again)
• Homer (getting attacked): No! I wanted to die choking on food!
• Homer (defeating the beavers): Finally! Man has triumphed over a small furry animal!
• Rich Texan: Welcome to the Lazy-I Ranch, where we give ya a full week of western ranch livin'.
  Comic Book Guy: Do you have an internet connection?
  Rich Texan: Internet?! (laughs) Son, the only internet connection we got is a dedicated DSL port in the business lounge. Or, you can patch in through the smart fridge in your cabin.
  Comic Book Guy: If said fridge is truly smart, it will be filled with Hot Pockets and baloney by the time I get there. Goodbye.
• Ned Flanders: (singing) There's a stranger in a manger and his name is love.
• (at the ranch, Bart tries to saddle a horse, but falls off. Two cowboys then begin laughing)
  Bart: I'll show you how people get on a horse where I'm from! (childishly) Daddy, I need uppsies!
  Homer: Coming sweetie!
  (Homer then lifts Bart up on the saddle and kisses him on the cheek. Bart sticks his tongue at the cowboys)
  Cowboy 1: Well, that sure shut us up.
• Homer: The Simpsons are going to Bart's idea!
• Cookie: Free range my ass! (Cocks shotgun and aims at a chicken) Tonight, you'll be swimmin' next to a matzah ball!