Simpsons Bible Stories
| "Simpsons Bible Stories" | |
|---|---|
| The Simpsons episode | |
| File:Aabf14.jpg | |
| Episode no. | Season 10 |
| Directed by | Nancy Kruse |
| Written by | Tim Long, Larry Doyle, and Matt Selman |
| Original air dates | April 4, 1999 |
| Episode features | |
| Chalkboard gag | "I cannot absolve sins." |
| Couch gag | The family slips on banana peels, but luckily everyone lands on the couch. |
"Simpsons Bible Stories" is the eighteenth episode of The Simpsons' tenth season. It aired on April 4, 1999.
Synopsis
It is a hot and dull Easter at church, and no one is interested in Reverend Lovejoy's sermons. When the collection plate is passed round, Homer puts in a chocolate Easter bunny, enraging Reverend Lovejoy, and provoking him to read the bible from the beginning. The Simpsons fall asleep.
Marge's Dream
Marge dreams she and Homer are Adam and Eve. They peacefully live in the Garden of Eden until Adam eats an apple from the tree, but blames it on Eve. Eve (Marge) is banished from the Garden of Eden, until Adam (Homer) thinks of a way of getting her back in. In the process they kill God's (who sounds like Ned Flanders) unicorn named Gary, so God, furious, expels them both from the Garden of Eden.
Lisa's Dream
Lisa imagines she and all the other Springfield Elementary students are Israelites in ancient Egypt, with the Pharaoh (Principal Skinner) making them build a pyramid. Only Moses (Milhouse) can liberate the Israelites. When Bart defaces the Pharaoh's Tomb, he gets the other students punished. Lisa helps Moses (Milhouse) produce plagues to scare the Pharaoh, they but fail to succeed. This in turn gets Lisa and Milhouse banished to a Pyramid prison. When they escape, Milhouse gathers all the students and attempts to leave. When they reach the lake, Lisa has an idea to get across: They simultaneously flush all the toilets to drain the lake. As they cross, the Pharaoh and his guards follow, but the water filled up and swalled them, but there enjoying splashiong each other, then the go back shore. Pleased that they have escaped, Milhouse asks Lisa if it's clean sailing for the Israelites, however Lisa disappoints Milhouse with the truth.
Homer's Dream
Homer pictures himself as King Solomon, who can solve disputes over objects by cutting each object in half. In one part, Lenny and Carl fight over ownership of a pie. King Solomon cuts it in half, sentences Lenny and Carl to death, and then eats the pie. Next, a Judge Judy-esque theme plays during the entrance of Jesus Christ and Checker Chariot. However, Homer's Dream is cut short when Bart wakes him up, complaining that he is sitting on Bart's arm.
Bart's Dream
The last story is an action-packed one where Bart sees himself as King David, who killed Goliath, but hasn't won the war yet: Nelson is Goliath II, Goliath's son. Goliath II has killed Grampa Simpson (Methuselah), Bart's oldest friend. In retaliation, Bart challenges Goliath II, but having no stones to sling at him, Bart loses and is expelled from the land. Bart then meets Ralph, a shepherd, who claims he can kill Goliath II. However Ralph dies, which enrages Bart even more. He then trains up to try and slay Nelson. Having to climb to enormous Tower of Babel, Bart manages to kill Nelson by throwing a lighted lantern down his throat. However, Nelson is still alive, but is quickly killed by Ralph's gravestone, which is hurled by the now alive Ralph. Much to Bart's amazement, he is sent to jail as the townspeople claim that Goliath was the best King they ever had, building roads, libraries and hospitals.
As the family wakes up, they realize that the Apocalypse has come. Although Lisa can go to Heaven, Homer takes her down to Hell with the rest of the family.
Trivia
- Though obviously not canonical, this episode is never rectified with the rest of the series, which continues on even though the world is shown to be ending here. See also: Thank God It's Doomsday, when the world ends again.
- Answering (though not necessarily correctly) one theological question, Adam and Eve are shown with bellybuttons.
- In the first segment Ned Flanders played the part of God, as if in opposition to Treehouse of Horror IV, where he was the Devil.
Goofs
- Reverend Lovejoy opens the Bible in the middle, and starts reading Genesis 1:1, which is on the first page. excluding table of content and such
Cultural References
- In the Moses segment, Chief Wiggum resembles Edward G. Robinson's character from The Ten Commandments.
Quotes
- Bart/David: You killed my best friend.
Crowd: Ooooooooooooh.
Nelson/Goliath II: Well, you killed my father, who was like a best friend.
Crowd: Oooooooooooooh!
- (After an explosion)
Bart/David: Good news everybody, Goliath II is dead! Although I haven't seen his body, the blast that failed to kill me would surely have killed a giant!
- Wiggum: (bringing Lenny and Carl) King Solomon, you are need to solve a dispute between these two men. They each claim ownership of this pie.
Homer/King Solomon: Hmmm. The pie shall be cut in two. And each man shall receive... death. (Lenny and Carl gasp) I shall eat the pie. (does so as Lenny and Carl are taken away)
Wiggum: Next up, Jesus Christ versus Checkered Chariot.
(Jesus and Mr. Chariot enter accompanied by the music to The People's Court. Jesus is wearing a suit and has a neck brace, holding a folder entitled "My Accident")
- Egyptian Slave Lisa: Moses, tell Pharaoh to let your people go!
Milhouse/Moses: Oh great! Now they're my people!
- Wiggum (throwing Lisa and Milhouse/Moses into a pyramid): So long, kids! Give my regards to the British Museum!
- Egyptian Slave Lisa (After a death trap in a pyramid malfunctions): Slave labor. You get what you pay for.
- Homer (When the Apocalypse comes, Lisa starts to ascend to heaven): Where do you think you're going, missy? (Drags Lisa down)
- Wiggum: Scrub harder, slave! I want to be able to eat off that thing! (looks at sundial) And make it snappy! It's almost lunchtime.
- Marge: Oh no,it's the apocalypse! Bart,are you wearing clean underwear?
Bart: Not anymore. - Homer/Adam: Oh, my dear sweet Eve, I love you even more than the butterscotch pond or the pornobush.
- Milhouse/Moses: Well, Lisa, we're out of Egypt. So, what's next for the Israelites? Land of milk and honey?
Slave Lisa: (consulting a scroll) Hmm, well, actually it looks like we're in for forty years of wandering the desert.
Milhouse/Moses: Forty years? But after that, it's clear sailing for the Jews, right?
Slave Lisa: (nervously) Uh-huh-hum, more or less... Hey, is that manna?
The children cheer and run off into the distance