Talk:Post-lineage yoga/GA1

GA Review

Passed. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 13:14, 14 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Lee Vilenski (talk · contribs) 18:39, 18 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I am planning on reviewing this article for GA Status, over the next couple of days. Thank you for nominating the article for GA status. I hope I will learn some new information, and that my feedback is helpful.

If nominators or editors could refrain from updating the particular section that I am updating until it is complete, I would appreciate it to remove a edit conflict. Please address concerns in the section that has been completed above (If I've raised concerns up to references, feel free to comment on things like the lede.)

I generally provide an overview of things I read through the article on a first glance. Then do a thorough sweep of the article after the feedback is addressed. After this, I will present the pass/failure. I may use strikethrough tags when concerns are met. Even if something is obvious why my concern is met, please leave a message as courtesy.

Best of luck! you can also use the {{done}} tag to state when something is addressed. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)}

Please let me know after the review is done, if you were happy with the review! Obviously this is regarding the article's quality, however, I want to be happy and civil to all, so let me know if I have done a good job, regardless of the article's outcome.

Links

Prose

Lede

Theodora Wildcroft should not be bold. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 12:07, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

She's certainly a major redirect target here per MOS:BOLDREDIRECT, as this is where she is introduced, described, and cited. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:03, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I'm not convinced per WP:R#ASTONISH. This isn't an article about this person. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 16:22, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Removed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 17:49, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

She states - stated Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 12:07, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Edited. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:03, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

She states that with the deaths of the pioneering gurus of modern yoga such as B. K. S. Iyengar and Pattabhi Jois, yoga teachers, especially women, are reclaiming their practice through their yoga communities, resisting commercialization as well as lineage. - this sentence should be in past tense. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 12:07, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:03, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

non-denominational, non-hierarchical, and non-authoritarian - gonna need some links. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 12:07, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Linked. Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:30, 23 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

General

There's a few tense issues here - such as the quote - "defines it as follows" - this is something she said in the past, so it should be in past tense. Check throughout. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:33, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Do we need a quote box? I feel like it should just be in prose. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

There's no box that I can see; perhaps one appears in some browsers. But the definition quotation is too long and too important just to embed in the text. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:33, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The image in the practice section - who drew this? Is this an official image or something? Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I redrew it from a broadly similar image in the cited source [3] so there are no copyright issues. It is in no way an official image or logo or anything of that sort: it's basically a Venn diagram of the different sorts of yoga involved. With the questions at the bottom, it impartially indicates possible issues with each of the sorts of yoga. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:33, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Wildcroft cites the yoga teacher and author Matthew Remski's statement that with the deaths of the pioneering gurus of modern yoga as exercise, such as Tirumalai Krishnamacharya, B. K. S. Iyengar, and Pattabhi Jois, individual yoga teachers, often women, are reclaiming the practice through their communities, resisting commercialisation and modernity more generally - this is a massive sentence. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Split. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:38, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Seems to be a thing in a few places, such as: She mentions Angela Farmer as an instance of such a radical practitioner; Farmer trained in Iyengar Yoga, moving away from it to become "one of the most influential"[1] teachers of the "divine feminine" approach to yoga, and on the way inventing the yoga mat; she has taught for over 50 years. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Split. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:50, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Also - Remski gives the example of Vanda Scaravelli, whom he describes as one of Iyengar's few female pupils who were not intimidated by him; he writes that she taught few students, "one at a time", and that all of them have "gone on to influence yoga for decades without grandiose institutes, certification programmes, or even websites". Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Split. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:50, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The second image is just of a woman doing yoga, the caption seems to be promotional in my eyes. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The caption is absolutely the reverse of promotional, indeed it is arguing against the image presented, as it directly states. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:21, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

We have three straight sentences that start "The scholar". Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Adjusted. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:50, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

There's an awful lot of what seems like pointless quotes, where we can summarise without them being used. Example: is "enter[ing] a time of post-lineage yoga", stating that he sees practitioners "step[ping] forward to hold the teachings" and the community "learning how to support itself".Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:33, 1 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I sense your impatience with these enthusiastic yoga teachers and their sometimes unskilful ways with words. But as usual there are two sides to this. There is already a large element of paraphrase in the Practice section. And, there is a value in letting commentators and practitioners speak in their own words – we certainly don't want everyone to sound like me, after all – and there is a constant danger of paraphrasing away the implications and connotations of their choice of words and ways of speaking. For instance, "entering a time of post-lineage yoga" may be carrying echoes for yoga people of things like "entering the age of Aquarius" or "entering the Kali Yuga". Such esoteric, spiritual, or religious overtones would be lost if we paraphrased "becoming more receptive to the idea of post-lineage yoga" which would be one way of interpreting what Heyman said. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:50, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Review meta comments

I'll begin the review as soon as I can! If you fancy returning the favour, I have a list of nominations for review at WP:GAN and WP:FAC, respectively. I'd be very grateful if you were to complete one of these if you get time. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 18:39, 18 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Many thanks! Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:43, 18 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Did you manage to get to my remaining comments Chiswick Chap. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:11, 12 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Lee Vilenski: Thanks for the reminder, it vanished below the radar with a GAN, an FAC, and an FAR all at once. I think I've addressed everything now, and it was an illuminating and perceptive set of questions. I hope you find the article the better for the review. All the best, Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:51, 13 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.