Jump to content

Talk:William Buchan (physician)

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

[edit]

This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Lethalbehemoth. Peer reviewers: Mgood13, Azhu8, Zerimare10.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 12:59, 17 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

[edit]

Hello, I am a student at Johns Hopkins University in a History of Modern Medicine class. We have to write, edit, or expand upon articles, and I was thinking this would be a good one to expand on. Please let me know if you have any thoughts or sources I could use. Thanks! Lethalbehemoth (talk) 05:15, 24 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I feel as though this article should be checked for style. The sentences seem very choppy. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 07:40, 17 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Page editing

[edit]

Hi. I am thinking about adding 750~1000 words on Buchan's career as well as personal life. It seems like the page only provides minimal detail about Buchan's career, and almost no information about his personal life. Please let me know! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Dhk0308 (talkcontribs) 08:57, 24 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I am planning on rewriting pretty much the entire page. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 06:24, 3 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hello Lethalbehemoth, I am also a student at Johns Hopkins University, and there are a few repeated sentences at the end of your article. I think a bit more on the impact of Domestic Medicine would be good as well. Other than that, I think you've done the ultimate job as a wikipedian! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Schen95 (talkcontribs) 16:21, 16 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Schen95, I agree. I although I edited pretty much the entire page, I did not look at the resources section. I will re-evaluate that section. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 04:46, 27 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Lethalbehemoth, great job on the additions! Here are some comments: It is kind of hard to get a sense of what the book is like, so maybe add some more concrete examples of what the book includes, and how it was tailored for the common man. You say industrial diseases are a focus in the book, but are there any details of a specific industrial disease or their treatment? On structure, you don't need the last concluding sentence under Domestic Medicine - this is not a persuasive essay! Add more pictures if you can find them? A picture of the book would be nice! Azhu8 (talk) 17:08, 16 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Hi, Azhu8, thanks for the feedback! I will look to add more detail to that section. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 04:46, 27 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Hi! Nice article, it really covers his entire life. The addition of Domestic Medicine does help so good job there as well. I would change the See Also section just because it's unnecessarily long - a few links would be fine. Zerimare10 (talk) 13:38, 17 March 2017 (UTC)Zerimare10[reply]
Hi, Zerimare10, I will look to edit the Also section. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 04:46, 27 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Recent edit on William Buchan

[edit]

The wiki page on William Buchan was very lacking, so I think the editor made a good addition to the page. However, I think adding more detail would have been better. For example, information on William Buchan was and is still very lacking. Since there is already a Wikipedia page on Domestic Medicine, I believe it would have been more valuable to include more on Buchan, himself. On top of this, it would have been better to elaborate more on Buchan's impact to the medical society. Yes, he contributed by writing Domestic Medicine, but explanation on its significance is lacking. Finally, I noticed that in the reference section, same references were cited multiple times. It would be better if this was reorganized to only contain one of each sources. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Dhk0308 (talkcontribs) 05:10, 16 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, Dhk0308! I agree that the personal life details is kind of short, but even a guy doing his phd in Domestic medicine of the time said there was very little information about his personal life. I did as much research as I could in the one week we had. If you have some other sources, I would love to see them! I will look to add more to the Domestic medicine section and clean up the resources section. Lethalbehemoth (talk) 04:49, 27 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Potential Edits

[edit]

It seems like there were some pretty solid improvements made (basically the rebuilding of the whole article). I think that the person above may have a point about the emphasis of parts of the article. As you mentioned there is limited information available on the man himself so it will definitely be difficult to include more information that you have placed already. I think the lead should be shortened a bit. It gives information that is given later almost word for word in later sections. I think a shorter lead that mentions, but doesn't necessarily go greatly in depth about Domestic Medicine would be more appropriate. The only important part otherwise would be to walk through the impact of his career and his writings. But good work on everything so far! Mgood13 (talk) 23:40, 16 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]