Template:Did you know nominations/Karlslust dance hall fire

The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Gatoclass (talk) 09:42, 11 December 2013 (UTC)

Karlslust dance hall fire

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~~... that, as a consequence of the Karlslust dance hall fire, the speed limit of 40 km/h (25 mph) for German firefighters in Allied-occupied Berlin was lifted?~~

Reviewed: Free school movement

Created by FoxyOrange (talk). Self nominated at 20:08, 4 December 2013 (UTC).

Good article, though I don't read German so I can't fully verify all the content of the article. Fulfills most of the eligibility criteria to my knowledge - New , long enough . Remaining issue is the hook - does not reflect the material in the article. The article says that the speed limit on all civilian vehicles was lifted, whereas the hook says the speed limit for German firefighters was lifted. Need to clear that confusion. Plot Spoiler (talk) 18:53, 8 December 2013 (UTC)

Dear Plot Spoiler, thank you for the review. Even before having created the article itself, I thought about what could be used to form a nice hook (something better than "DYK than in 1947, at least 80 people died..."). My initial idea was

... one reason for the delayed response to the 1947 Karlslust dance hall fire was the then speed limit of 40 km/h (25 mph) for German firefighters in Allied-occupied Berlin?

Concerning your comment, this easily could be transformed to

ALT1:... one reason for the delayed response to the 1947 Karlslust dance hall fire was the then speed limit of 40 km/h (25 mph) for civilian vehicles in Allied-occupied Berlin?

I felt that these hooks wouldn't flow well; they are quite long (which is why I originally proposed a shorter one). The problem is that rewording that one to something like

... that, as a consequence of the Karlslust dance hall fire, the speed limit of 40 km/h (25 mph) for civilian vehicles in Allied-occupied Berlin was lifted?

leads to a loss of causal information (it's not clear what the speed limit for civilian cars has to do with the fire). This is why I included the word "firefighters" as an example for a special subclass of the vehicles affected by the speed limit. Do you have another idea for a hook?--FoxyOrange (talk) 19:32, 8 December 2013 (UTC)

I like ALT2"... one reason for the delayed response to the 1947 Karlslust dance hall fire was that in Allied-occupied Berlin, civilian vehicles were limited to speeds of 40 km/h (25 mph)?" Plot Spoiler (talk) 20:20, 8 December 2013 (UTC)

Ok, then let's take this hook. I've stricken the other ones.--FoxyOrange (talk) 09:50, 9 December 2013 (UTC)

Great, good to go now.

Plot Spoiler (talk) 13:43, 9 December 2013 (UTC)