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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/State of Grace (song)/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Hog Farm via FACBot (talk) 28 March 2023 [1].


Nominator(s): Ippantekina (talk) 14:40, 6 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about a 2012 song by America's queen of heartbreak songs, Taylor Swift. This song finds Ms. Swift embracing stadium rock shamelessly. Though it was never released as a single, it has earned a reputation among critics for being one of her best songs. I think this article is comprehensive, well-written, and well-sourced to satisfy FA criteria. Would appreciate any and all comments on how to improve it further. Best, Ippantekina (talk) 14:40, 6 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Support by Chris

[edit]
  • "evoked by the first sights of love." seems odd wording to me. What are "sights of love"? Should it be "first signs of love"? (in both lead and body)
  • ""State of Grace" peaked within the top-50" - no reason for hyphen
  • ""State of Grace (Taylor's Version)" peaked within the top-10" - same here
  • "and top-25 in Australia" - and here :-)
  • "Speak Now continues the country pop sound on Swift's last records" => "Speak Now continued the country pop sound of Swift's previous records"
  • "Chapman remained a key personnel" - "a personnel" isn't really a thing. I would suggest "a key collaborator"
  • "Hank Williams mastered the track" - good to see her getting a country music legend involved (only joking :-))
  • "She later performed the song at Z100 Jingle Ball" => "She later performed the song at the Z100 Jingle Ball"
  • "On the July 10, 2018, concert at" => "At the July 10, 2018, concert in"
  • Does everything in the Music and lyrics section cover both the 2012 and 2021 versions? Is there anything notably different about the 2021 version?
  • "and the conflicting emotions ensued" => "and the conflicting emotions which ensue"
  • "Jason Lipshutz from Billboard lauded" - you just used the verb "laud" in the previous sentence, suggest picking a different word here
  • "Upon its initial 2012 release, "State of Grace" charted on in" - "on in"?
  • "peaking within the top-50 in Australia" - as before
  • "denoting of 500,000 track-equivalent units" => "denoting 500,000 track-equivalent units"
  • "peaking within the top-25 of Ireland" - guess :-)
  • None of the notes need full stops as they are not complete sentences
  • That's what I got :-) -- ChrisTheDude (talk) 16:54, 6 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
    Thanks for the quick review, ChrisTheDude. I've addressed your comments accordingly :) Ippantekina (talk) 04:11, 7 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support -- ChrisTheDude (talk) 08:38, 7 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Images are appropriately licensed. Nikkimaria (talk) 03:06, 7 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Source review (pass)

[edit]
  • Suggest replacing CNET with a different source (which seems quite possible given the material cited) as there is no consensus regarding its reliability post-October 2020 per WP:CNET.
  • CTV News ref is a republished version of a CNN article; suggest citing the original CNN article instead
  • ProQuest page numbers – can remove the period between the letter and number; it's ProQuest formatting, not the original (E3 not E.3)
  • suggest removing URL to ProQuest document as it is duplicative of the identifier Template:ProQuest.
  • I tried to look into {{ProQuest}} but apparently it is only supported by the parameter |id=. Ippantekina (talk) 09:52, 8 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
    • Sorry, what do you mean here? Both the URL and id= link to the same place. It is not necessary to have a URL when the id= exists. Heartfox (talk) 17:26, 8 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
      Then |access-date= and |url-access= will become null. I've made amendments to the Clayton-Lea ref for you to see what I mean. I wouldn't prefer this option as it leaves out the two said parameters which I think are important; specifically the latter that tells readers to expect the URL requires registration. But if the consensus is to remove the |url= parameter then I have no problems. Ippantekina (talk) 02:18, 9 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
      Template:Cite web says that "It is not necessary to specify a URL to a link identical to a link also produced by an identifier." I would either chose to have |url=, |url-access=, |access-date=, plus via=ProQuest, or just the identifier. I don't see it as necessary, but you could also add {{Subscription required}} following |id=. Heartfox (talk) 04:15, 9 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
  • "final promotional single" → final not supported by refs cited
  • "Several critics highlighted the maturity of Swift's songwriting" → several implies more than two critics, but only two are given
  • Spencer seems to be citing page 124 not a8. It doesn't say that Swift/Chapman produced the acoustic version.
  • not sure Clayton-Lea supports the sentence. It appears to be Clayton-Lea not Clayton-Tea

Heartfox (talk) 23:41, 7 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks Heartfox, I've addressed your comments accordingly. Ippantekina (talk) 09:52, 8 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

This passess the source review. Thanks for your cooperation and good luck with the nom! If you have time, Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/I Don't Wanna Cry/archive1 could use some more eyes :) Heartfox (talk) 18:38, 9 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Aoba47

[edit]
  • I think it would be beneficial to add an audio sample to the article. Was there a reason why File:Taylor Swift - State of Grace song sample.ogg was removed? I think a sample would helpful to illustrate the arena rock aspect in particular, especially since that gets a substantial amount of focus in the article and some readers may be less than familiar with that genre.
  • I felt the descriptions of the track can be conveyed through words, but "feedback-drenched guitars" might be hard to conceptualize so I added back the sample. Hopefully its usage is justified. Ippantekina (talk) 05:03, 13 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
  • Two sentences in a row, (Swift performed "State of Grace" live) and (She later performed the song), use "performed", and I would recommend varying the word choice to avoid unnecessary repetition.
  • For this part, (Sean Daly of the Tampa Bay Times agreed, but remarked that it was "bold regardless".), I would avoid using "agreed" in this context as it could give off the impression that Daly is explicitly agreeing with the previous critic (in this case Jonathan Keefe) in his review. I get that it is intended as a transition, but I would avoid it in this kind of context.
  • For the "100 Best Deep Cuts by 21st Century Pop Stars" list, the author for the "State of Grace" entry is known (i.e. Andrew Unterberger) so he should be attributed in the prose.

This is everything that I have noticed so far. I will do a few more read-throughs over the weekend, but I do not imagine that I will find anything major. I hope that my comments above are helpful, and best of luck with this FAC! Aoba47 (talk) 18:18, 9 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Aoba47 I'll get back to you asap. Have a nice weekend! Ippantekina (talk) 09:00, 10 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for the response and take as much time as you need. I hope you have a great weekend as well! Aoba47 (talk) 16:07, 10 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Aoba47, I have addressed your first round of comments. Let me know if there's anything left to address. Cheers, Ippantekina (talk) 05:03, 13 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Everything looks good to me. I support this FAC for promotion based on the prose. Best of luck with this nomination! Aoba47 (talk) 21:19, 13 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]


Support on prose. I've only looked at prose but I really can't find anything worth picking holes in. Not one of my favourite Swift songs but this article is certainly written to a professional, engaging standard. HJ Mitchell | Penny for your thoughts? 22:35, 18 March 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.