Wikipedia:Peer review/Elaine Paige/archive1
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because it's recently passed a GA review and I'm now contemplating nominating it to become a featured article. The general feedback I'd like is on the article's prose, and the new section "Views on theatre". Many thanks, Eagle Owl (talk) 10:16, 15 April 2008 (UTC)
Comments from weburiedoursecretsinthegarden
- I see you've had no input, so I'll try and pick out stuff to fix before entering the volcano that is FAC.
- Perhaps merge personal life and background.
- The discography table is a little ugly; perhaps make a list, like:
- Example Album Title (Year)
- Example Producer
- Notes
- A picture in the 21st century section would be beneficial.
- Hope these help, and hope to see it in FAC sometime. weburiedoursecretsinthegarden 10:16, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
Agree with you about the discography section, an IP recently added the producers so I've put back the old version as the producers may require citations that we don't have. I'll stick with the separation of the background and personal life, as otherwise I'm afraid that a merged section may be too long, but I agree with another picture needed, but unfortunately there aren't an abundance of free-images of Elaine Paige, or Elaine Paige related. Many thanks for the comments. Eagle Owl (talk) 13:46, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: Here are a few suggestions for improvement and questions I had on reading the article.
- released "I Know Him So Well" with Barbara Dickson, which remains the biggest-selling record by a female duo. I think it needs to be made clear (even in the lead) if this just in the UK or worldwide (assume the former, as written sounds like the latter)
- After Paige watched Natalie Wood on the LP version of West Side Story, she realized a career singing ... an LP is a Long Playing record - audio only, can't watch the performer on vinyl
- Awkward and a bit POV Paige's musical ability was greatly pushed by her school music teacher...
- I think the article needs a copyedit - example Paige went on to portray some of Lloyd Webber's most notable female characters, where she was the first to play the role of Grizabella in the original production of Cats on May 11, 1981, running until February 13, 1982.[18][19] could be smoother, perhaps Paige went on to portray some of Lloyd Webber's most notable female characters; she created the role of Grizabella in the original production of Cats from May 11, 1981, to February 13, 1982.[18][19]
- I would find a model artricle on a performer that is FA and use that for ideas on structure, etc.
- I think the article needs some critical reception information - what did critics say about her work on stage, her albums, etc?
Interesting article, but not quite up to FAC yet. Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 12:23, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
PS There are at least two places where the cart comes before the horse - we get her teacher's comment on her being too short for tennis and then we are told he is only 5 feet tall (also give meters too, per the MOS). The we are told in 2004 that shew spoke about her breast cancer before being told the story of her diagnosis and treatment. This can be confusing. Ruhrfisch ><>°° 12:48, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
All Done, except the suggestion about finding reception for her work on stage. I've scoured the internet to find critical reception information, and I have found a fair amount, that relating to Sunset Boulevard, Piaf and radio show, as well as noting her award nominations and wins. I may be able to find some reaction to her King and I and Drowsy Chaperone roles, but there doesn't seem to be anything out there about her albums unfortunately. Regarding "I Know Him so Well" single, all citations I've found say that it's the biggest-selling single by a female duo in The Guiness World Records, so that implies biggest-selling in the world. I'll have to look over the article's prose, but hopefully it's not a massive problem. Thanks for your help. Eagle Owl (talk) 13:46, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
- I've managed to find quite a lot more suitable information regarding reactions from critics! I hope this improves the quality of the article. Eagle Owl (talk) 15:39, 20 April 2008 (UTC)
Giano II comments: The page is good, very good. Just a few minor points To my mind the page it is probably over referenced, do so many sentences need 2 refs? - that's my view others may say yes, they do - so keep them in until someone on FAC says otherwise - don't be surprised if one person says one thing, and another another.
"Personal life" is not a good finish, perhaps have an "Elaine Paige today" type section ending. The page is top heavy on pictures, and needs a few more to keep interest going, if you can find them. - It's sad, but people often are attracted by the pictures rather like a comic. You have an awful lot of quotes - I assume the references do bear them out - verbatim - the couple I checked out did.
May be it is possible to expand on "Regarding her personality, she is known to sometimes be difficult:" gives a little human interest - this quote here "having to go on stage night after night knowing she wanted to be with Mum." shows there is more that could be in personal life" - Other than these, quite minor points, I don't see why it can't be an FA once further commentators points there have neem addressed. Giano (talk) 21:01, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
- Thanks for your comments. I didn't manage to find a free-image, but I uploaded a free-use one of her 2006 album; we might get away with it here as there isn't enough information to create an article for just the album. Yes, I also felt myself that there were a lot of quotes, so I transformed them into my own words for prose, but sometimes it's hard to know what to take out or not. Moved that info to personal life, which does tie in with her own cancer battle. Many thanks again. Eagle Owl (talk) 13:00, 23 April 2008 (UTC)
Comments from Ealdgyth (talk · contribs) -
- What makes the following reliable sources?
- http://www.lupus.org.uk/article.php?i=159
- This is an interview with Paige. If it was just a normal article written by lupus.org.uk about Paige's career, then I wouldn't have included it. I think this should be ok?
- http://london.broadway.com/home.aspx
- The articles used are interviews with Paige.
- http://www.whatsonstage.com/
- Normally not reliable, but they deal with the What's On Stage Awards, and I've noted Paige's nomination for the award in the article, so I figured the best place to go was whatsonstage.com.
- http://www.lupus.org.uk/article.php?i=159
- Consider not abbreviating BARB in the footnotes, it is easier on readers if they don't have to click through to figure out the publisher
I'd have asked these questions at FAC also, so consider this a prequel for FAC. 22:55, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
- Thanks for your time and comments. Eagle Owl (talk) 13:00, 23 April 2008 (UTC)