Wikipedia:Peer review/Muhammad Ilyas Qadri/archive1

Muhammad Ilyas Qadri

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… it should be given a GA status.

Thanks, _Contribs Muslim Editor ^Talk 08:04, 23 July 2010 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: Thanks for your work on the article - sounds like a very interesting person. I assume you know that to become a GA, articles have to be nominated at WP:GAN and this is a PR to prepare for that. With GAN in mind, here are some suggestions for improvement.

• One issue that would cause problems at GAN are the references. Per WP:CITE references come AFTER punctuation, and are usually at the end of a sentence or phrase. This has many refs before punctuation.
• Article needs more references in a few places, for example The attacker was released by Karachi police next day. has no ref and needs one, as does the statement including MadaniChannel, a non commercial Islamic satellite network. My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref.
• The references used are incomplete and need more data provided. For example, Internet refs need URL, title, author if known, publisher and date accessed. {{cite web}} and other cite templates may be helpful. See WP:CITE and WP:V
• I also note that some of the references seem to be repeated duplicates, for example refs 3 and 11, or 12 and 14. These should be combined using the ref name = trick (please ask on my talk page if you do not know how to do this).
• YouTube is fun, but is not usually considered a reliable source. I do not speak or read Urdu, so I have no idea how reliable those sources are - please try to find as many independent, third-party sources (so the Online Libraries are not third-party as they are his movement's website)
• Per WP:LEAD, his alternate name (Attar) should be in bold face.
• Days of the week are generally not given unless there is a significant reason to do so, and dates are not given with "th" after them (so just Qadri was born on 12 July 1950... would work).
• The WP:MOS says to refer to someone by just their last or family name in almost all cases - assume this is Qadri - I would also use hs name in each section (Early life just uses "He")
• Provide context to the reader - can the month and day of his marriage be given? How about the year of the founding of Dawat-e-Islami?
• Article has many typos and grammatical issues - for example Sheikh Ilyas Attar Qadri have[has] said: I have forgiven the one who kills me.[space]If someone succeeds in martyring me ,[space]Allah will decide to punish him or not.[space]But i[capitalize] will try my best to take him to Jannah with me,[spoace]if he[space]([the] one who killed me) was a beliver,[space]because due to him i[capitalization] got martydom.[12][13]
• The article uses {{cquote}} but according the documentation at Template:Cquote this is for pull quotes only, and this should probably use {{blockquote}} instead.
• A Good Article criterion is broad coverage. I got the idea that he was very religious and successful, but not much more about what he actually does or what exactly Dawat-e-Islami does. For example, the infobox mentions social networking and there is one phrase about it in the article, but there is no year when this started or any other information on it.
• Not much else to say as the article is quite short - there are many biography GAs and FAs that may serve as a useful model article with ideas and examples to follow.

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 05:13, 1 August 2010 (UTC)