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September 11

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08:16:57, 11 September 2022 review of submission by Davidt1510

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Hi there, I have taken references from other wikipedia articles on the same topic category such as https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_Consulting_Group and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bridgespan_Group, and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bain_%26_Company. I did a major overhaul to ensure neutrality...

Kindly advise so I can re-write it better, thanks! Davidt1510 (talk) 08:16, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Davidt1510:
First and foremost, this has been rejected and won't be considered further.
Second, using other articles as your yardstick is just asking for trouble; you should instead follow the various guidelines.
In any case, neutral tone and NPOV isn't really something you copy from other articles, it comes from you as the author. -- DoubleGrazing (talk) 08:29, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

20:01:26, 11 September 2022 review of submission by MrScottyNotter54

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MrScottyNotter54 (talk) 20:01, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

This shit again?! You get no sympathy from me.
This is the same tired fucking song and dance as the repeatedly-spammed-to-death attempts to get a BfDI article, and honestly we're fucking sick of it.Jéské Couriano v^_^v a little blue Bori 20:40, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
A thorough analysis but settle down there, Jéské. I'm sure this editor, who has now been blocked, is unaware of previous efforts to get an article on BfDI subjects on to the project. We can't assume that inexperienced editors are familiar with the trials of the good folks at AFC who've seen many versions of these articles pass through review. It's great that you spent the so much time to go through all of these inadequate sources in detail but if doing so makes you this angry and frustrated, it's probably best to take a pass, especially if it looks like the editor won't be here for long. Experienced and knowledgeable editors are too valuable to lose! Liz Read! Talk! 23:59, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
The "angry and frustrated" part is more about this being attempt number I-lost-count to push a BfDI-related article, not because of the source assessment. —Jéské Couriano v^_^v a little blue Bori 00:28, 12 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Jéské Couriano But do these editors know that? Or should they? 71.228.112.175 (talk) 04:41, 12 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
If they bothered to do any research, yes.Jéské Couriano v^_^v a little blue Bori 07:01, 12 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

20:26:06, 11 September 2022 review of submission by MrScottyNotter54

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MrScottyNotter54 (talk) 20:26, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

23:43:58, 11 September 2022 review of submission by Lindleygallegos

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Hi! I'd love to get some help with my page "Rasmus Bach" I haven't been accepted. I would love some help editing it and adding citiations. Somehow I'm in a developer view as well. I don’t know how to see the simple view. Please help! Thanks Lindley

 Courtesy link: Draft:Rasmus Bach
Before we start, I'm going to have a look at the sources you do cite. Refer to User:Jéské Couriano/Decode.
Now, you do have some sources, so that's good. The bad news is that this is a biography of a living person, so you need at least one source for literally every claim the article makes. We're looking for in-depth, non-routine, independent-of-the-subject news/scholarly sources that are written by identifiable authors and subjected to rigourous fact-checking. I will refer you again to /Decode:
  • (July 22, 1995) - Source? (Dates of birth are considered controversial information due to ageism in professional settings; while this generally does not apply to sports we have to request a source here.)
  • Rasmus Bach attended high school in Austin, Texas (Anderson High School)[...] - Source?
  • [...]played his NCAA Division II basketball for Fort Lewis College in the Rocky Mountain Athletic Conference in Durango, Colorado. Cite the Durango Herald source here (see Help:Footnotes#Footnotes: using a source more than once).
  • Bach scored 1,702 points in his FLC career, which ranks third all-time in Fort Lewis College history. - Source?
  • Alex Herrera is second with 1,758 points, and DeAndre Lansdowne is first with 1,861. - The specific figures are irrelevant. I'd actually replace the full stop in the last sentence with a standard stop, and write the two thus: Bach scored 1,702 points in his Fort Lewis College career, ranking third in all-time points behind Alex Herrera and DeAndre Lansdowne. You would still need to provide a source that backs up these claims.
  • Bach won numerous Rocky Mountain Athletic Conference awards, including for academics, in his senior season her was named NABC Honors Court, D2CCA All-Region Second Team, All-RMAC First Team, Academic All-RMAC First Team, and RMAC Player of the Week. - Lists of stuff fall into what I call "promotion-by-overdetail", and unless it's absolutely essential to understanding who someone is and what they do and have done, it should be left out or winnowed to the most important stuff. The source here was also dismissed above; you need a different one.
  • He made the All-RMAC team every year and was named Freshman of the Year in 2014. - Need a source for each claim (All-RMAC team every year and Frosh of the Year).
  • Under captain, Rasmus Bach, his team won two regular season championships in 2017 and 2018. - This sentence scans badly and seems to be very ambiguous as to its meaning. Rewrite it to be more clear. We need a source for each championship.
  • Rasmus Bach played two and half seasons (2019-2021) in the Danish National League where he played for Randers Cimbria. - Source? (We accept non-English sources and automated translation doesn't do too terribly with Dutch.)
  • He was last there in 2020 where he was averaging 12.5 points, 6.1 rebounds and 2.3 assists a game before the competition was shut down because of the pandemic. - The back half of this sentence needs to be rephrased a bit.
  • His team in Randers won the Silver medal in the 2020 season. - Irrelevant. It's one thing to state his team won it; it's quite another to claim he was instrumental in doing so. This would fit better in the article on his DNL team.
  • Bach signed a two year contract to the New Zealand Breakers in late 2020. - The Stuff source confirms the signing in late 2020; it however does not confirm the 2yr contract and would need to be supplemented with another source that does.
  • In his first season he appeared in 18 games and averaged 4.78 points per game shooting 44% from the field and 40% from the three point arch. - The source cited here is the NBL homepage, which is not fit as a cite. The other statistics line is uncited entirely.
  • Rasmus Bach is the son of Peter Bach and Janni Bach, both of whom played European Handball in the 2000 Summer Sydney Olympics. - Source?
  • Rasmus is married (2019) to Lindley Bach (Gallegos). - Source?
Hopefully this helps to explain what all needs sourced and what we're looking for source-wise. —Jéské Couriano v^_^v a little blue Bori 07:35, 12 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

 Courtesy link: Draft:Rasmus Bach

Lindleygallegos (talk) 23:43, 11 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Lindleygallegos: you have to make sure that every material statement is either supported with a reliable published source, or else removed. For example, the 'Personal Life' section talks about his family, but there is no source cited — where does that information come from? (See WP:BLP.)
And on a related point, I've posted a conflict-of-interest query on your talk page; please respond to it. Thanks, -- DoubleGrazing (talk) 07:31, 12 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]