Marriage in Islam

"Nikah" redirects here. For the film, see Nikah (film).

Template:Fiqh-Mar In Islam, marriage is a contract (Standard Arabic: عقد القران; Egyptian Arabic: كتب الكتاب Katb el-Ketāb; [] Error: {{Lang-xx}}: no text (help) Nikahnama) between a man and woman to live as husband and wife. A formal, binding contract is considered integral to a religiously valid Islamic marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom and bride. The marriage must be declared publicly. Divorce is permitted.

In addition to the usual marriage until death or divorce, there is a different fixed-term marriage known as Nikāḥ al-Mutʿah ("temporary marriage") permitted only by Twelvers (a branch of Shia Islam) for a pre-fixed period.

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Background

The Islamic marriage is declared publicly by a responsible person after delivering a sermon to counsel and guide the couple. It is not required, though customary, that the person marrying the couple should be religiously qualified. The Qur'an tells believers that even if they are poor they should marry to protect themselves from immorality ^{[Quran 24:33]}. The Qur'an asserts that marriage is the only legitimate way to satisfy one's sexual desire. Islam recognizes the value of sex and companionship and advocates marriage as the foundation for families. Marriage is highly valued and regarded as being half of faith, according to a saying of Muhammad: "Marriage is my Sunnah (practice or action of the Prophet) and whoever does not follow my Sunnah is not my true follower." (Ibn Haiah, Babun Nikah).

Divorce

Marriage in Islam is a contract with the standard elements of offer, acceptance and consideration, and not regarded as sacrosanct. It may be terminated by divorce subject to certain conditions. It is recommended in the Hadith that divorce should only be resorted to when there is no chance of reconciliation. Divorce may be instituted unilaterally by the husband by pronouncing talaq, "I divorce you" three times. There are many Hadiths requiring that talaq is not uttered sequentially three times but separated by a month between each utterance to provide opportunity for reconciliation. Majority of Islamic schools of jurisprudence (fiqh), do not regard a divorce as valid if this requirement is not followed, however others such as Hanafi discourage such practice but accept as binding if a triple talaq is said sequentially at one time.

Divorce at the behest of the wife is known as khula (Arabic: خلع), or release from the marriage or separation from her husband. It requires the consent of the husband, failing which the woman may seek a Sharia court judge (qadi), or (in non-Islamic countries) a recognized community panel, to grant the divorce if certain conditions are met and certain formalities are followed. It is similar to the Get in Judaic law, but unlike the latter where the husband has unilateral right to refuse, a Muslim woman may petition a qadi or the community panel to grant her a divorce, overruling the husband's refusal. This authority of the qadi or panel is subject to certain criteria which differ amongst the jurisprudential schools (fiqh), and is subsequent to attempting reconciliation between the parties failing or further arbitration to seek an amicable solution with voluntary proclamation of triple talaq by the husband has also failed. Ultimately the qadi or community panel has authority to grant the divorce subject to the wife and husband fulfilling certain requirements to reach an equitable solution.

Dowry/Mahr

Although mahr (donatio propter nuptias in Latin law) is often translated into English as dowry (as in the Quran translations below), either from translators lack of knowledge of the true English meaning. The mahr is not a gift, but a mandatory requirement for all Muslim marriages. If the marriage contract does not contain a specified mahr, the husband still must pay the wife a judicially determined sum, typically based on the mahr amount that women of equivalent social status receive. Mahr is mentioned several times in the Quran, although specific amount is not stated, nor in the Hadith, but generally it is an amount that would be sufficient for the woman to be able to survive for a while if her husband dies or divorces her. The term Dowry (Latin, dos) is inaccurate, as strictly speaking it is the money, goods, or estate that a woman brings forth to the marriage, usually provided by her parents or family. This may be accepted after the mahr has been paid by the man. The mahr may also be postponed to a later date by mutual agreement.

Quran [4:4] You shall give the women their due dowries, equitably.

[5:5] Today, all good food is made lawful for you. The food of the people of the scripture is lawful for you. Also, you may marry the chaste women among the believers, as well as the chaste women among the followers of previous scripture, provided you pay them their due dowries. You shall maintain chastity, not committing adultery, nor taking secret lovers. Anyone who rejects faith, all his work will be in vain, and in the Hereafter he will be with the losers

[60:10] O you who believe, when believing women (abandon the enemy and) ask for asylum with you, you shall test them. GOD is fully aware of their belief. Once you establish that they are believers, you shall not return them to the disbelievers. They are not lawful to remain married to them, nor shall the disbelievers be allowed to marry them. Give back the dowries that the disbelievers have paid. You commit no error by marrying them, so long as you pay them their due dowries. Do not keep disbelieving wives (if they wish to join the enemy). You may ask them for the dowry you had paid, and they may ask for what they paid. This is GOD's rule; He rules among you. GOD is Omniscient, Most Wise

Relationships which prohibit marriage

In certain sections of the pre-Islamic Arab tradition, the son could inherit his deceased father's other wives (i.e. not his own mother) as a wife. The Qur'an prohibited this practice.

Marriage between people related in some way is subject to prohibitions based on three kinds of relationship. The following prohibitions are given from the male perspective for brevity; the analogous counterparts apply from the female perspective; e.g., for "aunt" read "uncle".

A bride signing the nikah nama (marriage certificate)

Prohibitions based on consanguinity

Seven relations are prohibited because of consanguinity i.e. kinship or relationship by blood, viz. mothers, daughters, sisters, paternal aunts, maternal aunts and nieces (whether sister's or brother's daughters). In this case, no distinction is made between full and half relations, both being equally prohibited. Distinction is however made with step relations i.e. where both the biological mother and father of a couple wishing to marry are separate individuals for both parties, in which case it is permitted. The word "mother" also connotes the "father’s mother" and "mother’s mother" all the way up. Likewise the word "daughter" also includes the "son’s daughter" and "daughter’s daughter" all the way down. The sister of the maternal grandfather and of the paternal grandmother (great aunts) are also included on equal basis in the application of the directive.

Prohibitions based on suckling

Marriage to what are sometimes described as foster relations in English are permitted, although the concept is not the same as implied by the English word. The relationship is that formed by suckling from the breast of a wet nurse, this is what is meant by "fosterage" in Islam as in the quotation below. In this case the infant is regarded in Islam as having the same degree of affinity as in consanguinity and therefore prohibited in marriage when he grows up to those related to the wet nurse by the same degree as if to his own mother.

Hadith reports confirm that fosterage does not happen by a chance suckling, it refers to the first two years of a child's life before it is weaned Islahi writes that "this relationship is established only with the full intent of those involved. It only comes into being after it is planned and is well thought of"

Prohibitions based on marriage

The daughter-in-law is prohibited for the father, and the mother-in-law, the wife’s daughter, the wife’s sister and daughters of the wife's siblings (nieces), the maternal and paternal aunts of the wife are all prohibited for the husband. However, these are conditional prohibitions:

1. Only the daughter of that wife is prohibited with whom one has had conjugal contact.
2. Only the daughter-in-law of a real son is prohibited.
3. The sister of a wife, her maternal and paternal aunts and her brother's or sister's daughters (nieces) are only prohibited if the wife is in wedlock with the husband.

Prohibited Marriage Partners

• His mother
• His step-mother (this practice continues in Yoruba land in Nigeria, where in some cases the eldest son inherits the youngest wife of his father)
• His grandmother (including father's and mother's mothers and all preceding mothers e.g. great grandmothers )
• His daughter (including granddaughters and beyond )
• His sister (whether full, consanguine or uterine)
• His father's sisters (including paternal grandfather's sisters)
• His mother's sisters (including maternal grandmother's sisters)
• His brother's daughters
• His foster mother
• His foster mother's sister
• His sister's daughter
• His foster sister
• His wife's mother
• His step-daughter (i.e. a daughter by a former husband of a woman he has married if the marriage has been consummated. However, if such a marriage was not consummated, there is no prohibition)
• His real son's wife

Conditions

See also: Dower, Dowry, and Brideprice

The Qur'an outlines some conditions for a nikah to take place ^{[Quran 4:24]}:

• A nikah should be conducted through a gift – which here refers to the mahr. Once a mahr has been ascertained with the realization that it is an obligation of a Muslim husband, the groom is required to pay it to the bride at the time of marriage, however he and his bride can mutually agree to delay the time of its payment, or the wife can unilaterally decide to forgo it. In 2003 Rubya Mehdi published an article in which the culture of mahr among Muslims was thoroughly reviewed. There is no concept of dowry as such in Islam, although mahr (donatio propter nuptias in Latin law) is often translated into English as dowry in the want of a more accurate word. "Marriage gift" is a more accurate translation (see also dower and bride price). A dowry as such is a payment to the groom from the bride's family, and is not an Islamic practice but borrowed from other religions into some Muslim cultures, notably in the Indian Sub-continent.

• Another requisite of marriage is chastity. No fornicator has the right to marry a chaste partner, except if the two purify themselves of this sin by sincere repentance.

• Marriage is permitted for a man with a chaste woman from the People of the Book (Arabic - Ahl al Kitab, Christians and Jews) but not to polytheists. For women, marriage to non-Muslim men is prohibited.

• It is customary for marriage to take place with the consent and presence of the elders of the family. There must be a solid reason for a marriage taking place without the consent of the guardians or elders of a family. In the absence of such a reason, a Muslim state has the authority to stop such a marriage from taking place Muhammad made it clear upon the guardians through both his words and the measures he took that they must not take any decision in this regard without the woman's consent. If the woman wishes, their decision can be revoked. Binti Khudham says that when she became a widow, her father solemnized her marriage. She did not like the decision, so she went to Muhammad, and he gave her permission to revoke her marriage. Hence forced marriages are against Islamic teachings. However many Islamic societies consider, especially amongst the uneducated, that children must marry a partner approved of, and usually chosen by, the parents; children who defy their parents' wishes may in practice suffer penalties, supported by the community, from ostracism to honour killing, but this is very rare.

Rights and obligations of spouses

According to Islam, both man and woman have rights when they enter into a marriage contract and the husband is supposed to head the family-unit ^{[Quran 4:34]}. This guardianship has two aspects for both partners:

1. The husband's financial responsibility for the welfare of his wife and any children they may produce. In return, it is the duty of the wife to be obedient with regards to how the husband's wealth should be spent. However if the wife has wealth in her own capacity she is not obliged to spend it upon the husband or children, as she can own property and assets in her own capacity, unlike some other faiths and societies where the wife and her wealth are deemed the chattel of the husband. An indication of the financial expectation from the husband is in the mahr given by him to the wife, according to the custom of the society.
2. The husband's physical and emotional strength and honour. In return, the wife is supposed to guard the secrets of her husband and to be faithful.

Several commentators have stated that the superiority of a husband over his wife is relative and the obedience of the wife is also restrictive. The Quran advises men that if they are certain of a rebellious attitude by the woman, they should first admonish her, then refuse to share beds, and finally hit her (without leaving a mark and not on the face, as established by the Hadith). This refers to serious breaches of behaviour such as being promiscuous according to renowned 20th Century scholar Muhammad Hamidullah which is not expected from a dutiful wife, and not for simple disobedience to the husband. In explaining this, Ibn Abbas gives an example of striking with a toothstick (a very tiny piece of wood, incapable of creating any pain).

Women are also reminded that in case the husband is not fulfilling his responsibilities, there is no stigma on them in seeking divorce ^{[Quran 4:128]}. The Quran re-emphasizes that justice for the woman includes emotional support, and reminds men that there can be no taking back of the gifts given to women, however if a divorce is initiated by the wife the husband can insist on the return of what he gave her in order to agree to the dissolution of the marriage. This is taken from Hadith in which the wife of Thabith bin Qais is told to return the orchard her husband gave in order to proceed with the divorce.

However, many Islamic societies restrict women's rights despite their Quranic rights; women are often mistreated and sometimes suffer penalties, supported by the community.

See also

• Nikah mut‘ah (fixed-term marriage)
• Mahr (marriage gift or 'donatio propter nuptias'- Latin)
• Walima (marriage banquet offered by groom day after nikah)
• Talaq (unilateral divorce at behest of husband)
• Khula (dissolution of marriage at behest of wife)
• Nafaqah (financial obligations of the husband)

External links

• Nikah in Islam
• Nikah Khutbah
• Marriage in Islam
• E-Book: Marriage - A form of Ibada
• Understanding the verse of beating women in the Quran