Talk:Mary K. Rothbart

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Untitled

Hi Michaela!

I really liked your lead section because you brought a lot of focus to Dr. Rothbart's personal life. I tried to find more information about Rothbart's life outside of her research, but I really struggled. I am glad that you were able to find relevant information regarding Dr. Rothbart's personal life!Alyssa.j.anderson (talk) 02:07, 27 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Alyssa, I think this is a really good lead section. You explain the main topic, you definitely explain why the topic is important, and summarize the important points. If someone read this paragraph they would have a good overview of her research and professional career. But I also think that there should be a little more personal details included too. Such as when and where she was born. Mrocheleau13 (talk) 04:58, 27 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Courtney!

Your lead has good information, which is similar to both mine and Alyssa's which is good! I also think including the Infant Behavior Questionnaire was interesting since I didn't read anything about it. Since what all of us have are so similar for information I think our lead will be right on track to a good preview to our page. I also think it is good how concise and broad your lead is, which is what we want for a lead section.

Mrocheleau13 (talk) 21:06, 18 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Feedback

@Courtneyhagen, Alyssa.j.anderson, and Mrocheleau13: Nice work on your draft. A few things moving forward

You can tighten up your wording a bit. For example, you wrote

She is now retired from her teaching career, but continues to conduct research.

When you say "is now retired" you unnecessarily locate the article in a "now". Wikipedia articles aren't dated - they (hopefully) will continue to be updated and improved over the years. So rather than saying "She is now retired" say "She retired in [year] but continues..." {or "but remains active in research").

You need to include inline references. Check out the Sources and Citations training if you need a refresher on how to add sources.
Adding links to other articles helps integrate your work into Wikipedia, and makes it easy for readers to learn more about things they might want to learn more about. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 21:32, 6 December 2016 (UTC)[reply]