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Hi, I noticed the request to copy edit this article. I've just now begun. Please feel free to review my edits as I don't want to change any content. One thing I notice is that I think someone who knows more about the subject could assist me in paring the text a bit. My main concern is article and paragraph length, but I'm hesitant to remove anything that would alter the flow/structure of the article. Lazulilasher (talk) 20:26, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
I'm confused about this sentence, from the first paragraph of the background section: "In the latter two, it was especially pan-Islamic groups Indian groups." Lazulilasher (talk) 20:30, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
First of all, thanks for your help. With re to your question, that' supposed to mean "the latter two countries", ie Turkey and Persia. I know the article length is quite long, but I felt the background (where I wanted to cut down, and have) would be context less, especially because of wikipedia as well as internet coveage is very vague on the stuff that is covered, but these are very important to the background. The journal I used in fact had five pages on the background context alone. rueben_lys (talk·contribs) 01:09, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
No problem. Sorry it's taking me so long. I'm going to continue through the article, but I'm trying to be careful to not disrupt the thematic elements. Actually, as I was reading more of the article, I've come to find the background info more useful--especially for a neophyte like me. I think what we should do is work through it, discuss, and then see if there is anyway we can prune without losing cohesiveness. Agreed tho--with a topic such as this, it is important to have background (otherwise it's difficult to understand). All things considered though, this is extremely well-written and informative and I'm learning a lot as I go (slowly, I know :) )Lazulilasher (talk) 03:07, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
Question: I'm unsure, should it be middle-east or middle east, and should it be capitalised? There are different uses throughout the article and I'm unsure of the term's correct manner. Lazulilasher (talk) 02:58, 8 August 2008 (UTC)
The Second Expedition. It appears to me that references to Kermanshah should read "Kerman". Kermanshah is in the west of Persia which is a long way from where the expedition was operating.
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