Template:Did you know nominations/Albert Clapp

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by PFHLai (talk) 01:47, 2 January 2014 (UTC)

Albert Clapp[edit]

5x expanded by Harrias (talk). Self nominated at 23:05, 27 December 2013 (UTC).

  • All criteria for DYK looks good, but the year in hook is "1890", however, the sentence in the text relating the hook says "1891". If it was intended to mention exactly "1890", then the sentence in the article prior the hook's needs to be referenced as well. --CeeGee 19:36, 28 December 2013 (UTC)
  • I've clarified the sentence in the article. Harrias talk 13:23, 29 December 2013 (UTC)
  • OK, fine. It's now good to go. --CeeGee 16:26, 29 December 2013 (UTC)
  • Comment: "a share of £132" in the hook gives me the impression that his cut amounted to £132, which is not consistent with the article. Can this be clarified, please? Thanks. --PFHLai (talk) 07:40, 1 January 2014 (UTC)
  • It means "a share of £132": just like "a share of the prize" means not all the prize, "a share of £132" means not all of £132. It's pretty common usage. Harrias talk 09:50, 1 January 2014 (UTC)
  • I know what you're trying to say, but with a money value in there, the hook is making me think. It seems to me that Clapp got £132 out of an unknown total. How about this ALT1: ... that as a professional cricketer, Albert Clapp shared £132 with several teammates for playing for Somerset in 1890? or ALT2: ... that as professional cricketers, Albert Clapp and colleagues shared £132 for playing for Somerset in 1890? --PFHLai (talk) 10:57, 1 January 2014 (UTC)
  • The problem with those suggestions is that it doesn't make it clear that they were paid the £132: they could have shared paying a fee of £132 to play! Harrias talk 11:34, 1 January 2014 (UTC)
  • You're right! Let me cross out these bad hooks. Here's another one: ALT3... that professional cricketers such as Albert Clapp collected a sum of £132 for playing for Somerset in 1890? --PFHLai (talk) 18:14, 1 January 2014 (UTC)
  • I'm not sure, to me that sounds even more like he got the whole £132! How about: