Wikipedia:Peer review/Coach's Daughter/archive1

Coach's Daughter

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I have worked this hard to make this article a Good Article. I wonder if it is ready as a Featured Article. --George Ho (talk) 00:47, 12 July 2012 (UTC)

Thanks, George Ho (talk) 00:47, 12 July 2012 (UTC)

Lemonade51 comments Do think the article has some way to go before a FA nomination, that said it's not plausible. You may want to consider the article having a copyedit to deal with prose issues; I've only had the time to skim read through however:

• Ideally you should look at FA’s related to this for inspiration. Squeeze (The X-Files) was passed recently and serves a good account of the series; Lisa the Vegetarian is another well written one as is No Rest for the Wicked (Supernatural) another.
• The lead could do with some work, I’m not sure if it provides an adequate summary of the episode. Barely 100 words (which is fine considering the length) but no mention of its ratings, though you state "low viewership at its first airing"
  •  Expanded lede. --George Ho (talk) 16:08, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• Running time should refer to the actual episode length, not including commericals.
  •  Done --George Ho (talk) 16:38, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• “In this episode, Coach begins to dislike Roy”, who is Coach? Likewise, who is Roy? They should be wikilinked.
  •  Fixed, but I hope it's complete.
• reshot and rewritten do not require to be hyphenated
  •  De-hyphened. --George Ho (talk) 15:24, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• "Robert Bianco from The Pittsburgh Press" → "Robert Bianco of The Pittsburgh Press"
  •  Done. --George Ho (talk) 15:24, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• "including Allyce Beasley and especially the late Nicholas Colasanto" especially is redundant
  •  How so? Both were primarily part of the story. --George Ho (talk) 16:40, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• Why does Ref 2 has several dots next to 'by Ken Levine'?
  • The blog  says so. --George Ho (talk) 16:40, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• Is it The A.V. Club or the A.V. Club?
  •  "The". --George Ho (talk) 15:24, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
• Any idea where the episode first broadcasted in say, the United Kingdom, Canada or Australia to compare? Lemonade51 (talk) 13:46, 17 July 2012 (UTC)
  • How can I tell which network it aired in what country? Newspapers are very old, and the search engine couldn't help me narrow down the networks. Also, I cannot tell which day it aired. --George Ho (talk) 17:22, 17 July 2012 (UTC)

I wonder what criterion this version fails. --George Ho (talk) 16:59, 17 July 2012 (UTC)