Wikipedia:Peer review/McCormick Tribune Plaza & Ice Rink/archive1

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McCormick Tribune Plaza & Ice Rink[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because WP:CHIFTD is getting very close to having the bare minimum number of articles. If Jay Pritzker Pavilion does not pass WP:FAC, this one may. I thought I would get some feedback to clean it up. After getting most of the articles about features cleaned up, then we can go back and clean up the general Millennium Park article.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 01:12, 19 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: As requested, here are some suggestions for improvement. Since I have some experience with other articles in the Millennium Park series, some of these will be nade in comparison with those articles.

  • Article needs a copyedit - for example in the lead there is Opening in 2001, it was the first attraction in Millennium Park to open.[2] which could be made tighter as something more like It was the first attraction in Millennium Park to open, in 2001.[2] Or in the second paragraph in the lead, these two sentneces could be combined For four months a year, it operates as McCormick Tribune Ice Rink, a free public outdoor ice skating rink. It is generally open for skating from mid-November until mid-March.
  • Compared to other Millennium Park articles, there is very little on the design and construction of the feature. Who was the architect? Who were the contractors? I also note that there is one sentence that could be moved from Details to much earlier in the History Although the rink was budgeted for $5 million, it was constructed for only $3.2 million, making it one of the few Millennium Park attractions to cost less than was initially budgeted.[34]
  • I was also surprised that there was no critical reception infromation / section as such. I guess the people watching could be a part of such a section. Perhaps the appearance in the Weatherman film could too?
  • Have there been reviews of the Grill as a restaurant? Does the Grill serve food in the winter (is it then considered part of the indoor seating / dining area)? Could a bit more on the year-round restaurant be added?
  • Also since the AT&T Plaza / Cloud Gate is elevated realtive to the rink, how do people get up there from the rink, or down to the rink from the Bean? I know the park has won accessibility awards, but can't see ramps in the images.
  • I like the images, but wonder if File:Millennium Park Ice Skating.jpg would be a better lead image, since it actually shows people skating (swap it and the current lead rink image, which also is very nice, but shows no humans / skaters)
  • Again, knowing some of the past issues with images of copyrighted art, I wonder about the four images where Cloud Gate is in the background. Not sure at what point it becomes a fair use image. My guess is that less is better.
  • Most of the Details section seems to me like it could be in the Operations section - lobby, rental of skates, chiller system, Park Grill in off season. The dimensions of the rink could be added to history (if there is not much on construction, can at least start with the budget as noted before, then tell the reader how big it is).
  • Operations says the rink is open from 10 AM to 10 PM, then Details seems to imply longer operating hours Alcohol is allowed in the McCormick Tribune Plaza when the park is open (6:00A.M. to 11:00P.M. daily)[32] This is one of several places where things are repeated in Details (another reason to merge it) - the bathrooms are also repeated here, and the seating is repeated too - just realized the seats on Park Grill are given as 150 and 300. Can't both be right.
    • Hours vary from year to year apparently and by day of the week according to this years schedule. Text has been modified accordingly.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 04:27, 13 December 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Since it is fairly short, not much else to say. I can try and copyedit this too (and reorganize a bit if wanted) but obviously there is no rush (since Pritzker Pavilion is second in line for FAC and about ready and this would come after that)

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 12:18, 25 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Travel day today. Plane departs from O'Hare Airport in 3 hours. I am about to leave. I will look at these later, but surely not in the next few hours.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 13:39, 25 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Travel safely and have a Happy Thanksgiving! Ruhrfisch ><>°° 15:10, 25 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]
O'Hare now gives 20 minutes of free wifi. Holla!!!!--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 16:09, 25 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

More from Ruhrfisch

  • While this looks better, it still needs some copyediting work. As I said above, I can do that at some point. My problem is that it is less work for me to do the copyedit (which I have no time for now) than to point out lots of little things now.
  • I fixed the images in the infobox as they were goofy on my monitor (text wraps between pictures)
  • WP:MOSIMAGE says not to sandwich text between images, but the Ice rink section is sandwiched on my monitor. Moving the Park Grill pic down would avoid this, and put it in the section on the grill.
  • I would identify Rockefeller Center and its ice rink (wikilink at least) -see WP:PCR
  • Details section could be merged with the ice rink and park grill sections above it - as it is we have ice rink, then grill then detail is more ice rink and more grill (somewhat repetitive).
  • Still have two different seating numbers for the Park Grill (150 and 300)

OK, calling it a night. Ruhrfisch ><>°° 05:36, 17 December 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Ealdgyth (talk · contribs)

  • You said you wanted to know what to work on before taking to FAC, so I looked at the sourcing and referencing with that in mind. I reviewed the article's sources as I would at FAC.
Hope this helps. Please note that I don't watchlist Peer Reviews I've done. If you have a question about something, you'll have to drop a note on my talk page to get my attention. (My watchlist is already WAY too long, adding peer reviews would make things much worse.) 16:01, 10 December 2009 (UTC)