Wikipedia:Peer review/Tajuddin Ahmad/archive1

Tajuddin Ahmad

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This peer review discussion is closed.

I've listed this article for peer review because the article has went through extensive expansion and editing over the last 10 days or so. There are lot more to be done; there are obvious omissions. Still I am interested particularly in the following:

How far accessible the article is to an uninitiated audience, with little or no knowledge about Bangladesh or South-East Asian politics and history.
Pointing out parts of the article that need clarification/elaboration.
Suggestions on improving flow of ideas and events.

Thanks, Farhan nasim (talk) 06:19, 23 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Tom (LT)

@Farhan nasim thanks for your edits to this interesting and important article

I do think that it does a good job of orientating the reader to the political and social environment. I think the phrasing is very easy to read, and that the images are quite useful. I also think the article flows in a logical format. Actually, I think it's very close to good article status.

Some general things I would comment about this article though. You could improve it by:

Making sure the phrasing is neutral, eg. "Under Ayub's despotic rule, suffering and deprivation of East Pakistan only aggravated", "East Pakistan was grossly discriminated both economically and culturally"
Making the phrasing more encyclopedic, for example "Tajuddin's formative years were spent in the last days of British India, in Bengal—East Bengal, to be more precise—hotbed of anti-British activism, battered with famines, communal riots, and other problems." would be appropriate in a book about the times, but needs to be less colloquial if it's part of the encyclopedia. See WP:WEASEL for what I mean.
There are some 'citation needed' templates in the article that indicate the need for references

Overall I think this article does achieve your main goals, but there is some room for improvement. Let me know if you have any questions. Cheers --Tom (LT) (talk) 01:27, 30 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Tom (LT) Thanks for your opinion and apologies for replying late. Good to know that you didn't face any major difficulties in reading the article. Will accommodate your reviews as early as possible. --Farhan nasim (talk) 19:54, 25 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Kaiser matias

I'll look this over in the coming days. I'll also note I'm someone with "little of no knowledge about Bangladesh or South-East Asian politics and history", so will be glad to offer an outsider's perspective on how it reads. Kaiser matias (talk) 19:23, 1 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Kaiser matias Thanks for your interest in the article. Looking forward to know your views. --Farhan nasim (talk) 19:54, 25 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]