A stay-at-home dad (alternatively, stay at home father, house dad, SAHD, househusband, or house-spouse) is a father who is the main caregiver of the children and is generally the homemaker of the household. As families have evolved, the practice of being a stay-at-home dad has become more common and socially acceptable.
Pre-industrialisation, the family worked together as a unit and was self-sufficient. When affection-based marriages emerged in the 1830s, parents began devoting more attention to children and family relationships became more open. Beginning with the Industrial Revolution, large-scale production replaced home manufacturing; this shift, coupled with prevailing norms governing sex or gender roles, dictated that the father become the breadwinner and the mother the caregiver.
The number of stay-at-home dads began gradually increasing in the late 20th century, especially in developed Western nations. The recent statistic that Pew Research released, showed a report in June 2014 that found 2 million men to be stay-at-home dads in the US. However, in 2010, the number of stay-at-home dads had reached its highest point of 2.2 million.
Though the role is subject to many stereotypes, and men may have difficulties accessing parenting benefits, communities, and services targeted at mothers, it became more socially acceptable by the 2000s. The stay-at-home dad was more regularly portrayed in the media by the 2000s, especially in the United States. However, due to traditional family structures and stereotypic expectations, the stay at home father figure is culturally unacceptable in countries in South Asia such as India.
- 1 Evolution of family roles
- 2 Increase in popularity in the 21st century
- 3 Disadvantages
- 4 Advantages
- 5 Prevalence
- 6 See also
- 7 Further reading
- 8 References
- 9 External links
Evolution of family roles
In the colonial United States the nuclear family was the most common family form. Typical families consisted of five or more children initially; because of high infant mortality rates, only a few children survived adolescence. Colonial families existed to serve six main functions: self-sufficient business, school, vocational institute, church, house of correction, and welfare institution.
The first African-Americans to reach America were initially brought over as indentured servants, but instead became slaves. By the 19th century, slave trading was a thriving business. Typical slave families consisted of one or two children. Women were primarily the head of the families, either because the fathers had died or had been separated from the family. African-American women experienced what came to be known as the "double day", a full day of domestic chores plus a full day of work outside the home.
The Industrial Revolution led to extensive mechanization, resulting in a shift from home manufacturing to large-scale factory production. As this rapid transition took place, families lost many of their production functions. Instead, family members had to work outside the home to support their families. As a result, husbands and wives began operating in separate spheres of activity. The husband became the "breadwinner" by going out and working, while the wife stayed home and took care of the family.
Transition to modern family (1900–present)
The modern family is commonly thought to have originated in the 1830s: courtship became more open, marriages were often based on affection, and parents devoted more attention to children. At the beginning of the 20th century, married couples began to emphasize the importance of sexual attraction and compatibility in their relationships. This led to more intimate and open relationships along with more adolescent freedom. The transition of the family was influenced by the Great Depression, which forced many women into the workplace in order to compensate for lack of financial stability. In 1932, a federal executive order stated that only one spouse could work for the federal government. This resulted in many women being forced to resign allowing their husbands to continue working.
World War II had a significant impact on changing family roles. Because of the draft, workers were scarce in many industries and employers began to fill jobs with women, mainly in nontraditional positions. This increase in working women became one of the few times in history where women were praised for work outside the home. Divorce rates also reached a new high during this period. Not only had many women found a new sense of independence, but cultural shifts were underway, including the rise of feminism and the development of reliable methods of birth control. Such changes caused some women to decide to end their unhappy marriages.
The 1950s saw a "baby boom" in America. This period was also called the "Golden '50s". This was credited to families trying to make up lost time after the war. As a result, many families moved to the suburbs instead of residing in the city, the number of two-income families began to increase, and grown children began to remain at home longer because of financial difficulties. Gradually, women began re-entering the workforce. This progression away from the traditional view of the woman as the homemaker led to the creation of the role of the stay-at-home dad.
Increase in popularity in the 21st century
Stay-at-home dads have been seen in increasing numbers in Western culture, especially in Canada, the UK and the United States since the late 20th century. In developed East Asian nations such as Japan and South Korea, this practice is less common.
There are several reasons why some families feel that it would be more beneficial for the father to be the primary caregiver while the mother works outside the home. The decision to use a stay-at-home dad arrangement is most commonly due to economic reasons. At the same time, women are progressing into higher-paying jobs. There are now financial ramifications in deciding whether the mother or father should become the stay-at-home parent. In cases where the woman is the higher-paid parent, it makes more economic sense for her to continue to work while the man takes on the caregiver role. It also makes sense at times the mother's job offers health benefits for the family whereas the father's does not. It has also been shown that if the "pregnancy was jointly planned", the father is more likely to be involved.
With the growth of telecommuting, many men are also able to work from home. In this regard, he is contributing financially to the family while also acting as the primary caregiver of the family's children. Differences in parent's schedules can also account for some of the stay-at-home dads. Sometimes the father works odd work shifts while the mother has a typical nine-to-five work schedule.
Fixed gender roles began to become less prominent in the Western world starting in the late 20th century, allowing men to make their own choice of career without regard to traditional gender-based roles. Some men who choose this role may do so because they enjoy being an active part of their children's lives, while in other families, the mother wants to pursue her career. For example, of the 187 participants at Fortune Magazine's Most Powerful Women in the Business Summit, one third of the women's husbands were stay-at-home dads. Families vary widely in terms of how household chores are divided. Some retired males who marry a younger woman decide to become stay-at-home dads while their wives work because they want a "second chance" to watch a child grow up in a second or third marriage. Additionally, more career and lifestyle options are accepted and prevalent in Western society. There are also fewer restrictions on what constitutes a family.
Depending on the country or region, a stay-at-home dad might find more or less social support for his decision. In regions where traditional roles prevail, a stay-at-home dad might be shunned by stay-at-home mom's peer group. In order to find support for their choice, these men have created and joined many support networks.
Still, many men struggle to find acceptance within the role of stay-at-home dad despite the many gains that have been made. Many worry about losing business skills and their "professional place in line". There is a common misconception that stay-at-home dads cannot get a job and therefore must rewrite the typical family roles, forcing the wife into the workforce. In the United Kingdom, some househusbands say their wives lost respect for them, divorced them, then won custody of the children.
The role of stay-at-home dad may be difficult for men who feel as though they had no option. It is hard for these men to adapt from being a financial provider in the family to being a homemaker. Men who willingly choose to become a stay-at-home dad are much more satisfied with their role in the family.
For the father
- No longer the “Money Maker” in the family, may become an issue due to not being the main support and rock for the family.
- Transitioning from the workplace to stay at home role can be challenging.
For the mother
- Becoming the main source of income for the family and working long hours away from home and family.
- Will lose time with their children as a result of not staying at home.
For the child
There have been many studies done which suggest the importance of the paternal role in a child's life and benefits of the stay-at-home dad. Children respond differently to males and females at birth.
A study conducted by a United States child psychiatrist, Dr Kyle D. Pruett, found that infants between 7 and 30 months responded more favorably to being picked up by their fathers. Pruett also found that a father's parenting style is beneficial for a child's physical, cognitive, emotional and behavioral development. Mothers reassure toddlers when they become frustrated while fathers encourage them to manage their frustration. This helps the children learn to deal with stress and frustration. A long-term study Pruett conducted proved that a father's active involvement with his children, from birth to adolescence, promotes greater emotional balance, stronger curiosity and a stronger sense of self-assurance in the child.
Additional studies show that during the first five years of a child's life, the father's role is more influential than the mother's in how the child learns to manage his or her body, navigate social circumstances, and play. Furthermore, a 1996 study by McGill University found that the "single most important childhood factor in developing empathy is paternal involvement in childcare". Children that have a strong paternal influence have more nurturing abilities. It has been researched in The Role of the Father in Child Development, that in general, children with stay-at-home dads develop attachments at infancy. The study further concluded that fathers who spent time alone bonding with their children more than twice per week brought up the most compassionate adults.
Robert Frank, a professor of child development at Oakton Community College in Illinois, conducted a study comparing households with a stay-at-home dad and households with a stay-at-home mom. His study concluded that women were still able to form a strong bond with their children despite working full-time outside the home. Also, women working full-time were often more engaged with their children on a day-to-day basis than their male counterparts. His study concluded that in a family with a stay-at-home dad arrangement, the maternal and paternal influences are equally strong. This contrasts with the more traditional family structure where the father works outside the home and the mother stays home with the children. In this type of arrangement, the mother's influence is extremely strong, whereas the father's is relatively small. The study found that both parents play an equal role in a child's development, but the stay-at-home dad arrangement is the most beneficial for the child.
For the mother
The stay-at-home dad arrangement allows the mother to work without having to use a daycare or a nanny. This arrangement prevents the mother from having to deal with the stress of finding acceptable childcare, checking backgrounds, and paying for care. This arrangement also can help ensure that the family's values are being upheld and instilled in the children. Free from the stress of childcare, the working mother is able to actively pursue their career. This allows for a more relaxed working environment for the mother and allows her to focus on her career. If the mother has a higher paying job, this extra income will allow for savings to be made for the children, these savings could help the mother later on pay for university for the child and/or children. Thus, she can advance her career and provide more money for the family. It puts a sound mind for the mother knowing that the child/children are at a safe place with the father having the same safety and values as the mother. These are the same advantages for the father from having a stay-at-home mom arrangement.
For the father
A survey conducted by Minnesota's Department for Families and Children's Services shows that men consider child care to be far more important than a paycheck. Of 600 dads surveyed, a majority said their most important role was to "show love and affection" to kids. "Safety and protection" came next, followed by "moral guidance", "taking time to play", and "teaching and encouraging". "Financial care" finished last. Many men are now becoming more involved in their children's lives, and because of that many men now have a better understanding of what life is like for their child growing up in modern society. Because fathers are immersed in their children's lives, many of the stereotypically "manly" attitudes and activities historically prescribed for children may be circumscribed due to a more gender-neutral parenting approach that focuses on promoting independence and emotional well being. This allows children, especially male children, to grow up with a greater capacity for empathy and less rigidity in attitudes pertaining to gender roles than would perhaps be the case in more traditionally-structured households.
Stay-at-home dads make up a very small portion of the Australian population although this appears to be rapidly changing. In 2003, 91% of fathers with children aged under 15 years were employed with 85% employed full-time. Because of this, there are few role models or resources that can help Australian fathers with the stay-at-home dad role. The Australian Bureau of Statistics show that approximately 7% of two parents families with children under the age of 14 have a father who is unemployed and a mother who works full-time. Stay at home dads in Australia have almost doubled over the past decade from 57,900 to 106,000, and expected to increase in the future. Recent sociological studies have shown that men are dedicating more time and support to their children in comparison to the 19th century. The idea of a stay at home dad were far from mainstream, however the rising demand for female work has influenced this statistic to rise.
Over a 20-year period during the late 20th century, there was an increase in the number of women in the workforce in Canada. This shift increased father participation in family tasks that used to primarily be the responsibility of the mother. Beginning in the late 20th century, parental roles began to become less traditional, and the stay-at-home dad arrangement began to become more common. The number of stay-at-home dads increased by three percent points between 1976 and 1998, and the average age of a stay-at-home dad in Canada is forty-two. A bill was passed in by the Canadian government in October 1990 which granted paid leave for fathers for the purpose of primary caregiving.
Stay-at-home dads are not prevalent in East Asian countries, which generally have strict traditional gender roles. However, a survey conducted in 2008 in Japan suggested that nearly one third of married men would accept the role. The Japanese government passed a law in April 1992 allowing time off following the birth of a child for both male and female employees. In 1996, 0.16% of Japanese fathers took time off of work to raise children. In South Korea, about 5,000 men were stay-at-home dads in 2007. Even so, stay-at-home dads face discrimination from stay-at-home mothers, and are often ostracized.
Beginning in the 2000s, the stay-at-home dad began to emerge as a role in China, though some remain uncomfortable with the way the role changes traditional family dynamics. Customs in China suggest that men must be the heads of their households. Stereotyping is an issue for stay-at-home dads, who sometimes prefer not to tell others about their family arrangement. Traditional ideas promote criticism of "woman-like" men, and many[who?] feel that they would face humiliation and criticism for being stay-at-home dads. Others[who?] suppose they would be looked at as having a wife that is "too strong".
Until around 1990, the North Korean state required every able-bodied male to be employed by some state enterprise. However, some 30% of married women of working age were allowed to stay at home as full-time housewives (less than some countries in the same region like South Korea\Japan and Taiwan, more than Soviet Union\Mainland China or Nordic countries like Sweden, about the same as Today's United States).) In the early 1990s, an estimated 600,000-900,000 people perished in the famine, which was largely a product of the North Korean government's unwillingness to reform the economy, and the old system began to fall apart. In some cases women began by selling household items they could do without or homemade food. Today at least three-quarters of North Korean market vendors are women. A joke making the rounds in Pyongyang goes: 'What do a husband and a pet dog have in common?' Answer: 'Neither works nor earns money, but both are cute, stay at home and can scare away burglars.'
The role of the stay-at-home dad is not traditional in India, but it is socially accepted in urban areas. According to one sociologist's study in 2006, as much as three percent of all urban working fathers in India are stay-at-home dads, and twelve percent of unmarried Indian men would consider being a stay-at-home dad according to a survey conducted by Business Today. One sociologist Sushma Tulzhapurkar called this a shift in Indian society, saying that a decade ago, "it was an unheard concept and not to mention socially unacceptable for men to give up their jobs and remain at home." However, only 22.7 percent of Indian women are part of the labor force, compared to 51.6 percent of men; thus, women are more likely to be caregivers because most do not work outside the home.
According to an article by the Daily Mail, the number of stay-at-home dads in 2007 had increased by 83 percent since 1993. According to the same paper, in 2007, recent figures from the Office for National Statistics showed more than 200,000 fathers chose to stay at home and be the primary caregiver for their children.
In an interview published in the Radio Times in May 2013 Karren Brady made it plain she "could never be a housewife". While she maintains a business career in London her husband Paul Peschisolido has the role of house-husband though Brady collaborates in tasks at home to a certain extent.
In 2008, an estimated 140,000 married fathers worked in the home as their children's primary caregivers while their wives worked outside the home to provide for the family. This number is less than the previous two years according to the US Census Bureau. In 2007, stay-at-home dads made up approximately 2.7% of the nation's stay-at-home parents. This is triple the percentage from 1997, and has been consistently higher each year since 2005. In 2006, stay-at-home dads were caring for approximately 245,000 children; 63% of stay-at-home dads had two or more children. These statistics only account for married stay-at-home dads; there are other children being cared for by single fathers or gay couples. Also, it is difficult to ascertain how many of these stay-at-home dads have accepted the role voluntarily, and how many have been forced into it by the economic crisis of the late 2000s and early 2010s during which a great number of mostly-male blue-collar industries suffered significant losses and many previously employed men entered periods of prolonged unemployment.
- Double burden
- Father's rights
- Nursing father
- Paternal bond
- Parental leave
- Paternity leave
- Sociology of fatherhood
- Nelson, Julie A. (January 2016). "Husbandry: a (feminist) reclamation of masculine responsibility for care". Cambridge Journal of Economics. Oxford Journals. 40 (1): 1–15. doi:10.1093/cje/bev060.
- Goode, W.J. (1963). World revolution and family patterns. New York: Free Press. p. 60.
- Burgess, E. (1963). The family from institution to companionship. New York: American Book Company. p. 38.
- Skolnick, A. (1991). Embattled paradise: The American family in an age of uncertainty. New York: Basic Books. p. 93.
- "Statistics on Stay-At-Home Dads". National At-Home Dad Network. Retrieved 2016-05-16.
- Andrea Doucet, 2006. Do Men Mother? Toronto, ON: University of Toronto Press.
- "Stay at Home Dads Around the World - Stay at Home Dads". Stay at Home Dads. 2013-03-15. Retrieved 2016-05-16.
- Livingston, Gretchen. "Growing Number of Dads Home with the Kids". Pew Research Center’s Social & Demographic Trends Project. Retrieved 2016-03-22.
- Demos, J. (1970). A little commonwealth: Family life in Plymouth colony. New York: Oxford University Press. p. 24.
- Gutman, H. (1983). Persistent myths about the Afro-American family. New York: St. Martin's. p. 460.
- Jones, J. (1985). Labor of love, labor of sorrow: Black women, work and the family from slavery to the present. New York: Basic Books. p. 67.
- Milkman, R. (1976). Women's work and the economic crisis: Some lessons from the Great Depression. p. 73.
- Banner, L. (1984). Women in modern America: a brief history. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich. p. 77.
- Tuttle, W. (1993). Daddy's gone to war: The Second World War in the lives of America's children. New York: Oxford University Press. p. 144.
- Coontz, S. (2005). Marriage a history: How love conquered marriage. New York: Penguin. p. 201.
- "Connect for Kids". Retrieved 2009-07-29.
- Gill, Libby (2001). Stay-At-Home Dads: The Essential Guide to Creating the New Family. New York: Penguin Group.
- Parker-Pope, Tara (18 May 2018). "Working Women Say Their Marriage Is Richer For It" – via NYTimes.com.
- Cowan, Carolyn Pape, et al. "Encouraging strong relationships between fathers and children." Working Strategies 8.4 (2005): 2.
- Benokraitis, Nijole V. Marriages & Families: Changes, Choices and Constraints. New Jersey: Pearson Educations Inc., 2008
- "The Stay At Home Dad Oasis - Resources, Information, Connections, and Community for involved dads". AtHomeDad.org. Retrieved 2009-01-20.
- Appleyard, Diana (10 July 2007). "Househusband backlash as high-flying wives ditch men they wanted to stay at home". Mail Online.
- Rhonda Rowland CNN Medical Unit (2002-04-25). "Beyond tantrum control: Stay-at-home dads face health risks". CNN. Retrieved 2009-01-20.
- "Kyle Pruett Talks About Fatherhood | SparkAction". www.sparkaction.org. Retrieved 2016-03-22.
- Pruett, Kyle D. Fatherneed. Michigan: Free Press, 2000.
- Frank, Robert A. "The Role of the Primary Caregiving Father." (1995).
- Lamb, Michael E., ed. The role of the father in child development. John Wiley & Sons, 2004.
- Frank, Robert. The Role of the Primary Caregiving Father. Loyola University of Chicago, 1995.
- Tucker, Patrick. "Stay At Home Dad's." The Futurist Sept. 2005: 12-13.
- Braiker, B., Kuchment, A., & Dy, C. (2007, October 8). Just Don't Call Me Mr. Mom. Newsweek, 150(15), 52-55. Retrieved July 28, 2009, from Academic Search Premier database.
- Walsh, Liz. "Stay-at-home dad numbers almost doubled in last decade, Australian Bureau Statistics data show". The Adelaide Advertisor. Retrieved 28 August 2015.
- Statistics, c=AU; o=Commonwealth of Australia; ou=Australian Bureau of. "Chapter - Fathers' Work and Family Balance". www.abs.gov.au.
- Vernon, David. "Stay at Home Dad Struggles with Empathy. Naturalparenting.com 29 July 2009.
- Walsh, Liz (28 March 2013). "Stay-at-home dad numbers almost doubled in last decade, Australian Bureau Statistics data show". The Advertiser. The Advertiser.
- Stevens, Emily. "Understanding discursive barriers to involved fatherhood: the case of Australian stay-at-home fathers". Journal of Family Studies. 21 (1): 22–37. doi:10.1080/13229400.2015.1020989.
- "Stay home dads". www.huggies.com.au. Retrieved 2016-05-16.
- Marshall, Katherine. "Stay-at-Home Dads"=Perspectives Spring,1999: 9-15.
- Kato, Mariko (Jan 14, 2009). "Househusband not a bad gig, one-third of men say". Japan Times. Retrieved 2009-07-30.
- Mutsumi, Ota (1999). "Dad Takes Child-care Leave". Japan Quarterly. 46 (1): 83–89.
- "She brings home bacon, he cooks it". JoongAng Daily. November 2007. Retrieved 2009-07-30.
- Full-time Househusband Challenges China's Traditional Family Dynamics. 21 July 2006. People's Daily Online. 29 July 2009
- "a Chinese-English translation web (译言网）:Will Chinese women rule the world?". yeeyan.org.
- wrote by Andrei Lankov (a professor in South Korea national University) in a Chinese-English Translate Web (cuyoo.com):Pyongyang’s Women Wear The Pants Archived 2014-04-23 at the Wayback Machine.
- Dias, Raul (June 26, 2006). "Now papas do what mamas did best!". Times of India. Retrieved 2009-07-30.
- "Life & Times of Indian Men". Business Today. July 29, 2009. Retrieved 2009-07-30.
- "Asia's women in agriculture, environment and rural production". Archived from the original on 2014-06-30. Retrieved 2009-07-30.
- "Hire me ... the RT interview by Janice Turner". Radio Times; 4–10 May 2013; pp. 10-13
- "US Census Press Releases". Census.gov. Archived from the original on July 10, 2009. Retrieved 2009-07-19.
- Shaver, Katherine (2007-06-17). "Stay-at-Home Dads Forge New Identities, Roles". washingtonpost.com. Retrieved 2009-07-19.
- www.stayathomedads.com.au Support network for stay-at-home dads.
- The National At-Home Dad Network
- Growing Shift in Parental Gender Roles - ABC News