User talk:Offensiveb
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![]() | This article was the subject of an educational assignment in Fall 2013. Further details were available on the "Education Program:College of Staten Island/History of Design and Digital Media (Fall 2013)" page, which is now unavailable on the wiki. |
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September 2013
[edit] Hello, I'm SGGH. I wanted to let you know that I undid one or more of your recent contributions to Uhuru Kenyatta because it did not appear constructive. If you would like to experiment, you can use the sandbox. If you think I made a mistake, or if you have any questions, you can leave me a message on my talk page. S.G.(GH) ping! 10:16, 1 September 2013 (UTC)
Offensiveb, you are invited to the Teahouse
[edit]![]() |
Hi Offensiveb! Thanks for contributing to Wikipedia. |
first page I would like to edit
[edit]Graphis Inc. is the first article I would like to contribute towards, It is almost a stub yet it is the source of major events linked to award ceremonies like AIGA, and have influenced major designers through the years.Some of the things to be added in will include:
-date started, -some of the main ceremonies, -purpose of the organization -individuals involved -images and graphics, -historical context. --Offensiveb (talk) 01:47, 19 September 2013 (UTC)
Second Page I would like to edit.
[edit]The second page I would like to edit is still non-existent, it is a page about the designer Walter Herdeg who Has not yet been credited for his contributions to the design world. One major one being the creation of an important journal for designers. Herdeg's page will be fresh with everything like images, what he did to make him relevant in this discussion, and many other relevant things appertaining to him as a person and the making of his professional career. In a short list: - major works, - citations, - milestones, - outer links and inferences, - known applications and resources used, - possible colleagues and the uses/featuring of his contributions.
http://designishistory.com/1940/walter-herdeg/
Offensiveb (talk) 02:17, 19 September 2013 (UTC)
Third article to be edited
[edit]AIGA is the third article I would like to edit and include more sources, images and some due context. More info coming up on this post. Offensiveb (talk) 02:52, 19 September 2013 (UTC)
Speedy deletion nomination of Walter Herdeg
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A tag has been placed on Walter Herdeg requesting that it be speedily deleted from Wikipedia. This has been done under section A7 of the criteria for speedy deletion, because the article appears to be about a person or group of people, but it does not indicate how or why the subject is important or significant: that is, why an article about that subject should be included in an encyclopedia. Under the criteria for speedy deletion, such articles may be deleted at any time. Please read more about what is generally accepted as notable.
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"Plan of Attack"
[edit]The two articles that i would like to work on are Graphis and Walter Herdeg. They are closely related and are important in that they were significant marks in design history. The two articles are related, of similar content, and if both are dome, they could make good cross-referencing material for one another, all within wikipedia, as well as links leading to similar sources
Walter Herdeg is a Switzerland-born designer, and is also the creator of the Graphis Magazine, which has recently extended into the Graphis corporation, as well as the Graphis Inc webpage. The Graphis web page features similar collection of work as would be on the hard copy of the magazine itself. The difference between the editions is yet to be determined by the research, but it has been confirmed by about two sources that while the magazine featured different works of art within a single edition, some of the editions were dedicated to more niché movements of corners of the design culture.
The next article which is Graphis Inc, will include early history of design, as appertaining to the time period of the formation of this magazine and the preceding company. There will be a keen observation/perusing of the art style at the time of formation. The management style of the company will also be worth a mention, as it will be useful to know whose 'composition' is reflected by the entity. Graphis is still an active body, and information akin to the handling of the company, and its management will be necessary details.
For both articles, images will be company of value, since Herdeg is a designer, he would have some images to go with the article. The Graphis article would also have several popular versions of work done by the artists and featured in the magazine. The work on Herdeg's page has already started and have some of the above listed developments, however not live, as it sits in my sandbox (owing to excited deletionists) to avoid any premature submission cases. The Herdeg page will be completely new, but the Graphis page is in existence as Graphis Inc. a stub on wikipedia and could use some attention. However the preferred selection of the two will be the fresh page on Walter Herdeg.
The links of the closely related pages follow below.
http://www.aiga.org/medalist-walterherdeg/
http://www.graphis.com/competition/poster-annual-2012/archived/
http://www.designers-books.com/gebrauchsgraphik/
http://ehis.ebscohost.com/conn/node2/593535/www.jstor.org/stable/3186778
http://ehis.ebscohost.com/conn/node2/593535/www.jstor.org/stable/3190585
http://www.designishistory.com/
http://www.hellerbooks.com/docs/books.html
http://www.designishistory.com/1940/walter-herdeg/
https://www.typotheque.com/articles/walter_herdeg_editor_and_founder_of_graphis
https://www.typotheque.com/articles/hans_eduard_meier_a_life_dedicated_to_letter_design
http://www.hellerbooks.com/docs/aiga.html
http://www.hellerbooks.com/pdfs/catalogs_steven_heller_2007.pdf
http://www.internationalposter.com/poster-details.aspx?id=SWL06286
http://www.museum-gestaltung.ch/en/exhibitions/annual-program-2012/jack-kunz/
These sources and some more upcoming discuss the designer Walter Herdeg and his creations as well as his life's work at Graphis Magazine, (now Graphis Inc).
Offensiveb (talk) 00:39, 3 October 2013 (UTC)
- I am keeping my comments here, rather than on the talk page for your sandbox page, as you are maybe(?) more likely to get an alert that I have left you message if we do it here, rather than on a sandbox page. (vis-a-vis the edits I made before that you didn't receive an alert for.)
- I like the progress you are making. A handful of comments:
- This quality of the writing in this version is much improved. Your sentences are much more NPOV, and streamlined. BUT, I think you can clean it up more, and I think you *need* to do so in order to pass muster with a new page. This means not adding more text, but rewriting & refining what is currently there. For example, these sentences "Due to his wish of a better material, this became a major turning point in his life, when he decided to establish his own design magazine called Graphis. The establishment of this design magazine was a major achievement in Herdeg's career since it served as his legacy and contribution to the design field" should be something more like "Herdeg founded Graphis, a design magazine that was the major achievement of his career." Do you see the difference? It cuts to the point, removes extraneous words, and conveys the facts, as backed up in the citations.
- include the citations you have on the talk page. Cite them as a Journal.
- You uploaded an image to wikipedia, which you claim is public domain. Where did you find the image? Are you 100% sure it is public domain, as I am not so certain. Have you closely read the chapter from Digital Foundations on Searching an Sampling?.
- Once you have made these revisions, we can talk about posting it. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Theredproject (talk • contribs) 18:22, 5 October 2013 (UTC)
How the sources will be used.
[edit]First source http://www.aiga.org/medalist-walterherdeg/
The first source will be used as a historical backdrop to Walter Herdeg's life in the field of design.
- Dates relating to his establishment in the field of Graphic design,
- Relations of Walter Herdeg to the times he came to be important,
- Award that he earned for his work at the hands of the organization AIGA,
- Some of the styling displayed in his work
Second source http://www.historygraphicdesign.com/index.php/the-age-of-information/the-international-typographic-style/35-walter-herdeg
The second source will also add needed contextual support to Herdeg's storyline'
- What led to Herdeg's rise in popularity,
- Some clues into the main work of Herdeg, the establishment of Graphis Magazine
- A few innovations by Herdeg
Third source
http://www.graphis.com/competition/poster-annual-2012/archived/
The third source leans toward raw content
- Looking into Herdeg as a producer, not a person,
- What Graphis magazine was,
- Works featured in the magazine
- Some imaging
Fourth source
http://www.designers-books.com/gebrauchsgraphik/
Herdeg was not the first design magazine producer
- Context of how this work was new to the world of design
- What was happening at the time
- The influential forces of Graphis
Fifth source
(page citation yet to be formatted)
- Scholarly source with merits in the academic sector on Herdeg,
- Backing up the external links to the article,
- Extra info on Herdeg and design period
Sixth source
http://ehis.ebscohost.com/conn/node2/593535/www.jstor.org/stable/3186778
- Second Academic source on Herdeg,
- Similar historical context as other sources,
- Herdeg as a business manager/design curator
Seventh source
http://ehis.ebscohost.com/conn/node2/593535/www.jstor.org/stable/3190585
- Scholarly article,
- Design work,
- History
More sources will be added after visit to the library. Offensiveb (talk) 23:41, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- Good work. I think you still need more sources to flesh out the biography, and should look for those during/after our next library visit.--Theredproject (talk) 11:31, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
Herdeg 1100 words in sandbox
[edit]Hi Offensiveb, Your Herdeg article in your sandbox is looking good. You are making steady progress. You definitely need to add more sources to justify some of your claims. I think your writing/language is getting clearer and more NPOV, though there continues to be room for improvement. Take these two sentences, for example:
- Due to his wish of a better material, this became a major turning point in his life, when he decided to establish his own design magazine called Graphis
and
- Through the magazine, the unknown designers of Eastern Europe, Soviet Union, Japan, Finland among other lesser known design communities.
The first one has a bunch of extraneous words in it; you can say the same thing with less words. Less words is clearer and easier to read/understand! The second one is missing a verb. Try to read the text out loud to catch as many of these problems with the writing. Also, you should consider nominating it for Did you know.--Theredproject (talk) 22:58, 26 October 2013 (UTC)
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