User talk:RyanK8585
Welcome
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ukexpat (talk) 14:42, 15 September 2010 (UTC)
Feedback on your article draft
[edit]Hello! Coming from your question on the Help desk, I've taken a look at your article draft User:RyanK8585/Steven_D._Silverman. On the whole it looks fairly good, but there are a few things you can improve before moving it to the main article space (see also: Wikipedia:So you made a userspace draft).
- As User:ukexpat and Tnxman307 already noted, the tone is a bit too promotional; I recommend you tone it down. Phrases like "After a string of acquittals for his clients" smack of promotion, while "He gained immediate noteriety" is a no-no unless you have a strong source that says exactly that - in pretty much all cases I would remove the phrase entirely. Also remove things like "undisputed", "high-profile", "substantial", "most notable" (unless you've got a source that says exactly that). I would also scrap the "Recognition" section - whilst the things you cite are factual, it's almost impossible to write about them whilst preserving the article's neutral point of view. Also scrap "The Commission plays an important role in promoting public confidence..." - it's a fluff sentence which adds nothing to the article's subject.
- There are some minor formatting issues that you can correct, particularly in citing references: see Wikipedia:Manual of Style (footnotes). Also, please don't use "Id" or "See supra" in reference citations; you can use "named references" (see the guide I linked to) to re-use the same reference multiple times.
- Some of your references don't actually support the things you say in the article. For instance, you cite the website of the St Paul's School for Boys as reference for Mr Silverman's schooling - but I could find no mention of him on the school's website. Either reference a page which backs up what you say in the article, or remove the reference entirely. However, keep in mind that as per our policy on Biographies of living persons, information which isn't backed up by a source tends to be zealously deleted.
- The "external links" section is a bit long, consider trimming it down to maybe three or four links.
- You're basing the article almost entirely on information from Mr Silverman's own website, which is not a reliable source. Also, notability is a bit weak for your article, Mr Silverman is only mentioned in third-party sources twice, and then only in passing. If you can find more good sources it would help, especially sources not affiliated with Mr Silverman. Take a look at Identifying reliable sources for more guidance.
I hope this helps you in improving the article! If you feel that you've taken my comments into account, you may remove the notice at the top of the article and move it to the main article space. If you've got any questions please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. — QuantumEleven 15:11, 15 September 2010 (UTC)
- All excellent advice. Note that the article is now at Steven D. Silverman. – ukexpat (talk) 16:25, 15 September 2010 (UTC)
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The article Steven D. Silverman has been proposed for deletion because of the following concern:
- A biography of a US lawyer that's just a list of cases -- none particularly noteworthy or landmark -- along with the usual CV details. In other words, a basic a legal-services directory entry.
While all constructive contributions to Wikipedia are appreciated, pages may be deleted for any of several reasons.
You may prevent the proposed deletion by removing the {{proposed deletion/dated}}
notice, but please explain why in your edit summary or on the article's talk page.
Please consider improving the page to address the issues raised. Removing {{proposed deletion/dated}}
will stop the proposed deletion process, but other deletion processes exist. In particular, the speedy deletion process can result in deletion without discussion, and articles for deletion allows discussion to reach consensus for deletion. Calton | Talk 09:40, 9 June 2017 (UTC)