Talk:Not My Life
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Copyedit finished
This is just a note to let you know that I'm done with copyediting the article. I hope I helped and didn't mess things up too much. As you can see, I removed a bunch of wiki links from words that I felt were too general or commonly known. For example, I removed the states from "Chicago, Illinois" etc. because I felt these cities were all well-known enough to stand by themselves.
I also want to talk to you about one of the images in this article: File:Wiki-prostitute.png, the drawing of the woman leaning on the car window. I think it should be removed. It doesn't have anything in particular to do with this movie, and honestly, I think it portrays a pretty stereotypical view of prostitution, something this movie tried to refute.
Anyhoo, have a good one. Bobnorwal (talk) 18:52, 4 November 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for the copyedit! It is greatly appreciated. I have replaced the image you mention with a more suitable one. Thanks again! Neelix (talk) 21:33, 4 November 2013 (UTC)
GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Not My Life/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: 1ST7 (talk · contribs) 01:26, 5 November 2013 (UTC)
Hey Neelix, I'll review this. Initial comments should be posted in the next twenty-four hours. --1ST7 (talk) 01:26, 5 November 2013 (UTC)
Here's the review:
- Well-written
- The phrase "many people watching the film bring to it the belief that slavery was abolished a long time ago" sounds a little strange. I think it would be better to just say that "many people believe that slavery was abolished a long time ago".
- Please explain this phrase a little more: "These girls are pictured in a doorway." Does it mean they are standing in a doorway while they are being filmed? What is the reason for including this detail?
- Verifiable with no original research:
- Reference no. 23 is a dead link.
- Broad in its coverage:
- The article implies that the third installment to the trilogy has been cancelled. Can you please make this more clear?
- Neutral:
- Stable:
- Illustrated, if possible, by images:
Overall, this article looks close to ready for promotion, and you've done a great job on it (documentaries can be pretty hard to find a sufficient number of sources for). I'll put the article on hold until the things mentioned above are addressed. --1ST7 (talk) 01:31, 6 November 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for taking on this review! I have reworded the sentence about the abolishment of slavery, clarified the nature of the scene in which girls appear in a doorway, repaired the link rot, and added a new source to explain the current situation with Bilheimer's plans for his next film. Please let me know if you have any remaining concerns regarding the article. Neelix (talk) 05:06, 6 November 2013 (UTC)
- Everything looks good now, so I'm passing the article. Congratulations, and thanks for your work on it! --1ST7 (talk) 05:45, 6 November 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for taking on this review! I have reworded the sentence about the abolishment of slavery, clarified the nature of the scene in which girls appear in a doorway, repaired the link rot, and added a new source to explain the current situation with Bilheimer's plans for his next film. Please let me know if you have any remaining concerns regarding the article. Neelix (talk) 05:06, 6 November 2013 (UTC)
Rhodes article
An awful lot of this is based on Nancy Keefe Rhodes's article in Stone Canoe. In fact, that is the only item in the Bibliography as of now. This is not bad of itself, but there are places where the article ceases to be about the film and instead is about the article. For instance
...audiences' views on contemporary slavery are nonetheless influenced by the slave-like imagery in such films as Hustle & Flow (2005) and Black Snake Moan (2007). The Academy Award-winning Hustle & Flow portrays a pimp as the hero, while Black Snake Moan features Christina Ricci as a young nymphomaniac; the marketing for Black Snake Moan centered on evocative, sexualized slave imagery, including a scantily-clad Ricci in chains.
These are interesting points, but they are points made by Rhodes in her article, not Bilheimer in his film, and therefore not directly pertinent to the Themes section of this article. Regardless of the fact that this now has Featured Article status, it needs to be edited to stay focused on the film, and not stray off into tangential discussion about slavery or its perception in the modern world. 86.41.35.180 (talk) 14:16, 17 November 2014 (UTC)
District attorney blow job request
According to an interview with Bilheimer outside the film, an assistant district attorney, who was contacted to help a friend of Angie's prepare her testimony, "asked her to ... give him a blow job before he talked to her". I had to re-read this sentence 4 times before I could make sense of it---there are too many nested modifiers for my brain. Instead of fixing it, I would like to delete it because this section pertains to the "contents" of the movie, but this sentence appears to refer to something that isn't actually part of the movie. Any objections? Phlar (talk) 22:57, 17 November 2014 (UTC)
Is anybody there?
This article was on the front page of Wikipedia a couple of weeks ago, yet nobody appears to even be watching the talk page! Or at least nobody seems to be bothered to respond to serious questions about the content. I'm going to simply delete the sentences referred to in the two sections above, as nobody has come up with any ideas for improving them. 86.41.47.125 (talk) 14:32, 3 December 2014 (UTC)
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