Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High
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|"Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High"|
|Family Guy episode|
Promo Image, featuring Chris and his new teacher Mrs. Lockheart (played by Drew Barrymore in the episode)
|Episode no.||Season 4
|Directed by||Pete Michels|
|Written by||Ken Goin|
|Original air date||May 8, 2005|
|Family Guy (season 4)
List of Family Guy episodes
The Griffin family attend an open house at Chris's school, and Chris's English teacher, Mrs. Clifton, wins the lottery. Due to Mrs. Clifton's resignation, Lois suggests Brian to fill in as a substitute teacher. He enjoys the job, but is moved to a remedial class, which consists of nothing but inner city youth (a la Dangerous Minds). When he finds the techniques used in his previous class inadequate, he does not know how to help them since society is giving up on them. Stewie suggests that he should act like them, and he dances to the robot. He takes Stewie's advice and tries "talking their language", but appears racist. After an angry morning, he unintentionally teaches them to aspire to low-level jobs, the students noting that Brian is the first person who ever told them that they could amount to anything.
Meanwhile, Chris is instantly smitten with his new teacher, the voluptuous Mrs. Lana Lockhart, who is voiced by actress Drew Barrymore. Chris asks his parents for advice on how to get a girl to like him, and Stewie gives him a condom, since he has heard about his relationship with his teacher. Lois tells him that he should be romantic, and Peter suggests that he should dress up as a naked spaceman to be spontaneous. When Chris shows up to class, Mrs. Lockhart is shocked and thinks he's being too impulsive. Lois is not pleased with this. She and Peter talk to Mrs. Lockhart, in which Peter tactfully tells Mrs. Lockhart "our son Chris, would like to plow you", and requests a picture of Mrs. Lockhart with an intent to affix it to the back of Lois's head. Afterwards, she goes to Chris's house confesses her love for him and finds out that Chris is in love with her; she promises Chris to be with him if he kills her husband, Ronald, though he does not do it. When Lois finds the teacher's written instructions in Chris' laundry, she runs to Mrs. Lockhart's home and finds the mauled body of her husband. Believing Chris is the killer, Lois and Stewie conspire to cover up the plot by dumping the body in the lake and bluffing a policeman. Back at home, the rest of the family treats Chris differently because they believe he actually killed Mrs. Lockhart's husband, until it is shown on the news that it was really Mrs. Lockhart and a bear. In the last scene, Mrs. Lockhart and the bear are found in a motel, with Mrs. Lockhart all dressed up for a nice evening dinner while the bear is lying on the bed watching television. After engaging in stereotypical passive-aggressive behavior with Mrs. Lockhart, the bear concludes that he is not in the mood to go out for the night. He then attempts to ameliorate Mrs. Lockhart's disappointment by rubbing her back with his foot and saying "Love you...", and with that the episode concludes.
- The title of the episode is a parody of the title of the film Fast Times at Ridgemont High; the school bears the name of Buddy Cianci, longtime Mayor of Providence, Rhode Island, who has had repeated run-ins with the law.
- The regular Family Guy opening sequence is replaced with a parody of the opening sequence of Law & Order. Steven Zirnkilton even provides the opening narration.
- Mrs. Lockhart's plan to have Chris murder her husband comes from the real-life events of currently incarcerated Pamela Smart and the murder of her husband, Greg Smart, as well as the film inspired by these events, 'To Die For' (arguably the animation for Mrs. Lockhart's husband is modeled after Matt Dillon, who played Suzanne Stone's murdered husband in the same film).
- A cutaway to Donny and Marie Osmond (pop stars and stars of Donny & Marie) show them in bed together.
- When Chris' principal is receiving a massage from "Estovan", he sings "On Top of Old Smoky".
- When Lois asks whether Mrs. Clifton is coming back to the classroom, Peter replies, "I don't know", and is showered with green slime. This is a reference to the Canadian 1980s television series You Can't Do That on Television, and the following shot of a man's face with "You Can't Do That On Television" stamped on top in red letters, is a direct reference to the show's opening sequence.
- The scene where Brian's students stand on their desks and say O Captain! My Captain! is a parody of a similar scene in the 1989 Robin Williams film Dead Poets Society.
- The scene where Lois worries about Chris going to prison refers to the HBO television series Oz, yet the prisoners in the showers are singing "In the Merry Old Land of Oz" from the 1939 fantasy film, The Wizard of Oz.
- The subplot involving Brian is a parody of Stand and Deliver.
- The students in Brian's class are modeled after those depicted in the 1995 Michelle Pfeiffer film Dangerous Minds.
About 9.71 million viewers watched this episode.
- Aurthur, Kate (2005-05-10). "Arts, Briefly; Is 'Elvis' Really Dead?". The New York Times. Retrieved 2009-03-26.
- "Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High" at the Internet Movie Database
- "Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High" at IGN.com
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