Wedding invitation: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 00:51, 31 March 2011
A wedding invitation is a letter asking the recipient to attend a wedding. It is typically written in formal, third-person language and mailed five to eight weeks before the wedding date.
Like any other invitation, it is the privilege and duty of the host—historically, for younger brides in Western culture, the mother of the bride, on behalf of the bride's family—to issue invitations, either by sending them herself or causing them to be sent, either by enlisting the help of relatives, friends, or her social secretary to select the guest list and address envelopes, or by hiring a service. With computer technology, some are able to print directly on envelopes from a guest list using a mail merge with word processing and spreadsheet software.
Text
Etiquette regarding the text on a formal wedding invitation varies according to country, culture and language. In Western countries, a formal invitation is typically written in formal, third-person language, saying that the hosts wish for the recipient to attend the wedding and giving its date, time, and place.
As the bride's parents are traditionally the hosts of the wedding, the text commonly begins with the names of the bride's parents as they use them in formal social contexts, e.g., "Mr. and Mrs. John Q Smith" or "Dr. Mary Jones and Mr. John Smith". The exact wording varies, but a typical phrasing runs as follows:
Dr. Mary Jones and Mr. John Smith
request the honour of your presence
at the wedding of their daughter
Mary Jane
to
Colonel Dusty Rhodes
at two o'clock
on the first of November
at Christchurch Hall
If the groom's parents are also hosts of the wedding, then their names may be added as well. If the parents are not the hosts of the wedding, then the host's name is substituted in the first line, or, especially if the bride and groom are themselves the hosts, it may be written in the passive voice: "The honour of your presence is requested at the wedding of..."
Formal announcements, sent after the wedding ceremony, omit the time and sometimes the place, but usually retain the same general form.
Informal invitations, appropriate to less formal weddings, are issued by word of mouth or by hand-written letter. So long as they convey the necessary practical information about the time and place, there is no set form for these invitations.
Printing and design
Commercial wedding invitations are typically printed using one of the following methods: engraving, lithography, thermography, letterpress printing, sometimes blind embossing, compression plate process, or offset printing. More recently, many do-it-yourself brides are printing on their home computers using a laser printer or inkjet printer. For the artistically inclined, they can be handmade or written in calligraphy.
Historically, wedding invitations were hand-written unless the length of the guest list made this impractical.[1] When mass-production was necessary, engraving was preferred over the only other widely available then option, which was a relatively poor quality of letterpress printing. Hand-written invitations, in the hosts' own handwriting, are still considered most correct whenever feasible; these invitations follow the same formal third-person form as printed ones for formal weddings, and take the form of a personal letter for less formal weddings.[1]
Tissues are often provided by manufacturers to place over the printed text. Originally, the purpose of the tissue was to reduce smudging or blotting, especially on invitations poorly printed or hastily mailed before the ink was fully dried, but improved printing techniques mean they are now simply decorative.[2] Those who know that their original purpose has been made irrelevant by dramatic improvements in printing technology usually discard them.
Modern invitation design follows fashion trends. Invitations are generally chosen to match the couple's personal preferences, the level of formality of the event, and any color scheme or planned theme. For example, a casual beach wedding may have light, fresh colors and beach-related graphics. A formal church wedding may have more scripty typefaces and lots of ornamentation that matches the formal nature of the event. The design of the invitation is becoming less and less traditional and more reflective of the couple's personality.
The invitation is typically a note card, folded in half, or perhaps French folded (folded twice, into quarters). Other options include a sheet of paper, a tri-fold, or a trendy pocket-fold design. The appropriate paper density depends on the design, but typically ranges from heavy paper to very stiff card stock.
Mailing
Traditionally, wedding invitations are mailed in double envelopes. The inner envelope may be lined, is not gummed, and fits into the outer envelope. The outer envelope is gummed for sealing and addressing. More recently, the inner envelope is often left out in the interest of saving money, paper, and postage. In some cases, a pocketfold takes the place of an inner envelope.
In countries that issue them, the envelope may be franked with love stamps. The United States postal service issues a love stamp each year specifically denominated to cover the double weight of the invitation and reply (a rate slightly less than the cost of two regular stamps).
Other items
In addition to the invitation itself, sellers promote a full panoply of optional printed materials. The ensemble may include an R.S.V.P. response card, a separate invitation to a wedding reception, and information such as maps, directions, childcare options, and hotel accommodations.
These printers also sell matching pieces intended for the day of the wedding, such as programs, menus, table cards, place cards as well as wedding favors and party favors such as napkins, coasters, cocktail stirrers and matchboxes.
Response
As with any invitation, the sole obligation of the person receiving it is to respond, as promptly as reasonably possible, to let the hosts know whether or not he will be able to attend.[3] Receiving a wedding invitation does not obligate the recipient either to attend the wedding or to send a gift.
A proper response is written on the recipient's normal stationery, following the form of the invitation. For example, if the invitation uses formal, third-person language, then the recipient replies in formal, third-person language, saying either "Mr. Robert Jones accepts with pleasure the kind invitation to the wedding on the first of November", or "Ms. Susan Brown regrets that she is unable to attend the wedding on the first of November."
Pre-printed, pre-addressed, pre-stamped response cards are frequently sent in the hope of encouraging a greater proportion of invited people to respond to the invitation.
In pop culture
In "The Invitations" episode of Seinfeld, George Costanza's fiancé Susan is killed by licking toxic wedding invitations that George picked out since they were inexpensive.
See also
- Personal wedding website
- History of wedding invitations
- Monogram
- Indian wedding card
- Wedding crashing
References
- ^ a b Martin, Judith (2005). Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior. New York: W.W. Norton & Co. pp. 390–391. ISBN 0-393-05874-3.
- ^ Elizabeth Post, Emily Post on Weddings, page 65. 1987.
- ^ Martin, Judith (1990). Miss Manners' guide for the turn-of-the-millennium. New York: Simon & Schuster. p. 436. ISBN 0-671-72228-X.