Marriage in Islam

"Nikah" redirects here. For the film, see Nikah (film).

In Islam, marriage is a contract (Standard Arabic: عقد القران Egyptian Arabic: Katb el-Kitab, Hebrew Ketubah, Urdu Nikah-Nama) between a man and woman to live as husband and wife. A formal, binding contract is considered integral to a religiously valid Islamic marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom and bride. The marriage must be declared publicly. Divorce is permitted.

In addition to the usual marriage until death or divorce, there is a different fixed-term marriage known as Nikāḥ al-Mutʿah ("pleasure marriage") permissible in Shia Islam, not discussed in this article.

History

It was a Sunnah (custom) of earlier prophets which the Islamic Prophet Muhammad re-instituted and passed on to his ummah. The Arabic word for marriage is nikah (Arabic: نكاح‎ nikāḥ), which is generally used to refer to Islamic marriages.

Polygamy

According to the Qur'an a man may have up to four wives (temporary wives under Nikāḥ al-Mutʿah do not count towards this limit); the restriction on the number was not customary before the Qur'an. There are certain conditions, and the husband is required to treat all wives equally. A bride-to-be may stipulate in the marriage contract her conditions such as monogamy. A woman may not have more than one husband.

Background

The Islamic marriage is declared publicly by a responsible person after delivering a sermon to counsel and guide the couple. It is not required, though customary, that the person marrying the couple should be religiously qualified. The Qur'an tells believers that even if they are poor they should marry to protect themselves from immorality ^{[Quran 24:33]}. The Qur'an asserts that marriage is the only legitimate way to satisfy one's sexual desire. Islam recognizes the value of sex and companionship and advocates marriage as the foundation for families. Marriage is highly valued and regarded as being half of faith, according to a saying of Muhammad: "Marriage is my Sunnah (practice or action of the Prophet) and whoever does not follow my Sunnah is not my true follower." (Ibn Haiah, Babun Nikah).

Divorce

Marriage in Islam is a contract with the standard elements of offer, acceptance and consideration, and not regarded as sacrosanct. It may be terminated by divorce subject to certain conditions, although Hadith state divorce should only be resorted to when there is no chance of reconciliation. Divorce may be instituted unilaterally by either spouse; if by the husband it is called talaq, if by the wife khula, which requires the return of the mahr (dowry given to the wife by the husband upon marriage), failing which a qadi (Sharia court judge) may administer it, subject to certain formalities.

Relationships which prohibit marriage

In certain sections of the pre-Islamic Arab tradition, the son used to inherit the wife of his deceased father. The Qur'an prohibited this practice.

Marriage between people related in some way is subject to prohibitions based on three kinds of relationship. The following prohibitions are given from the male perspective for brevity; the analogous counterparts apply from the female perspective; e.g., for "aunt" read "uncle".

A bride signing the nikkah nama (marriage certificate)

Prohibitions based on consanguinity

Seven relations are prohibited because of consanguinity i.e. kinship or relationship by blood, viz. mothers, daughters, sisters, paternal aunts, maternal aunts and nieces (whether sister's or brother's daughters). In this case, no distinction is made between full and half relations, both being equally prohibited. Distinction is however made with step relations i.e. where both the biological mother and father of a couple wishing to marry are separate individuals for both parties, in which case it is permitted. The word "mother" also connotes the "father’s mother" and "mother’s mother" all the way up. Likewise the word "daughter" also includes the "son’s daughter" and "daughter’s daughter" all the way down. The sister of the maternal grandfather and of the paternal grandmother (great aunts) are also included on equal basis in the application of the directive.

Prohibitions based on suckling

Marriage to what are sometimes described as foster relations in English are permitted, although the concept is not the same as implied by the English word. The relationship is that formed by suckling from the breast of a wet nurse, this is what is meant by "fosterage" in Islam as in the quotation below. In this case the infant is regarded in Islam as having the same degree of affinity as in consanguinity and therefore prohibited in marriage when he grows up to those related to the wet nurse by the same degree as if to his own mother.

Hadith reports confirm that fosterage does not happen by a chance suckling, it refers to the first two years of a child's life before it is weaned Islahi writes that "this relationship is established only with the full intent of those involved. It only comes into being after it is planned and is well thought of"

Prohibitions based on marriage

The daughter-in-law is prohibited for the father, and the mother-in-law, the wife’s daughter, the wife’s sister and nieces of the wife's siblings, the maternal and paternal aunts of the wife are all prohibited for the husband. However, these are conditional prohibitions:

1. Only the daughter of that wife is prohibited with whom one has had conjugal contact.
2. Only the daughter-in-law of a real son is prohibited.
3. The sister of a wife, her maternal and paternal aunts and her brother's or sister's daughters (nieces) are only prohibited if the wife is in wedlock with the husband.

Conditions

See also: Dower, Dowry, and Brideprice

The Qur'an outlines some conditions for a nikah to take place ^{[Quran 4:24]}:

• A nikah should be conducted through a gift – which here refers to the Mahr. Once a mahr has been ascertained with the realization that it is an obligation of a Muslim husband, the groom is required to pay it to the bride at the time of marriage, however he and his bride can mutually agree to delay the time of its payment, or the wife can unilaterally decide to forgo it. In 2003 Rubya Mehdi published an article in which the culture of mahr among Muslims was thoroughly reviewed. There is no concept of dowry as such in Islam, although mahr (Donatio Propter Nuptias in Latin law) is often translated into English as dowry in the want of a more accurate word. "Marriage gift" is a more accurate translation (see also dower and bride price). A dowry as such is a payment to the groom from the bride's family, and is not an Islamic practice but borrowed from other religions into some Muslim cultures, notably in the Indian Sub-continent.

• Another requisite of marriage is chastity. No fornicator has the right to marry a chaste partner, except if the matter has not gone to court and the two purify themselves of this sin by sincere repentance.

• Marriage is permitted for a man with a woman from the People of the Book (Arabic - Ahl al Kitab, Christians and Jews) but not to polytheists. For women, marriage to non-Muslim men is prohibited.

• It is customary for marriage to take place with the consent and presence of the elders of the family. There must be a solid reason for a marriage taking place without the consent of the guardians or elders of a family. In the absence of such a reason, a Muslim state has the authority to stop such a marriage from taking place Muhammad made it clear upon the guardians through both his words and the measures he took that they must not take any decision in this regard without the woman's consent. If the woman wishes, their decision can be revoked. Binti Khudham says that when she became a widow, her father solemnized her marriage. She did not like the decision, so she went to Muhammad, and he gave her permission to revoke her marriage. Hence forced marriages are against Islamic teachings. However, many Islamic societies consider that children must marry a partner approved of, and usually chosen by, the parents; children who defy their parents' wishes may in practice suffer penalties, supported by the community, from ostracism to honour killing.

Rights and obligations of spouses

According to Islam, both man and woman have rights when they enter into a marriage contract and the husband is supposed to head the family-unit ^{[Quran 4:34]}. This guardianship has two aspects for both partners:

1. The husband's financial responsibility for the welfare of his wife and any children they may produce. In return, it is the duty of the wife to be obedient with regards to how the husband's wealth should be spent. However if the wife has wealth in her own capacity she is not obliged to spend it upon the husband or children, as she can own property and assets in her own capacity, unlike some other faiths and societies where the wife and her wealth are deemed the chattel of the husband. An indication of the financial expectation from the husband is in the mahr given by him to the wife, according to the custom of the society.
2. The husband's physical and emotional strength and honour. In return, the wife is supposed to guard the secrets of her husband and to be faithful.

Several commentators have stated that the superiority of a husband over his wife is relative and the obedience of the wife is also restrictive. In order to correct domestic abuse, the Quran advises men that if they are certain of a rebellious attitude by the woman, they should first admonish her, then refuse to share beds, and finally hit her (without leaving a mark and not on the face, as established by the Hadith). This refers to behaviour which is not expected from a sane woman. In explaining this Ibn Abbas gives an example of striking with a toothstick (that at the time of revelation was a very tiny piece of wood, incapable of creating any pain).

Women are also reminded that in case the husband is not fulfilling his responsibilities, there is no stigma on them in seeking divorce ^{[Quran 4:128]}. The Quran re-emphasizes that justice for the woman includes emotional support, and reminds men that there can be no taking back of the gifts given to women.

However, many Islamic societies restrict womens's rights despite their Quranic rights; women are often malreated and sometimes suffer penalties, supported by the community, from ostracism to honour killing.

See also

• Nikah mut‘ah (fixed-term marriage)
• Mahr (marriage gift or 'donatio propter nuptias'- Latin)
• Walima (marriage banquet offered by groom day after nikah)
• Talaq (unilateral divorce at behest of husband)
• Khula (dissolution of marriage at behest of wife)

External links

• E-Book: Marriage - A form of Ibada
• Understanding the verse of beating women in the Quran