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GayRomeo
GayRomeo-Logo
Type of site
Dating website
Available inEnglish, French, German, Dutch, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, Greek, Romanian, Swedish
OwnerPlanetRomeo B.V.
Created byJens Schmidt and Manuel Abraham
URLwww.gayromeo.com
CommercialYes
RegistrationOptional

GayRomeo is a worldwide Internet forum, chat and dating community for gay, bisexual and transgender men. The site was established in October 2002 by PlanetRomeo GmbH in Berlin, Germany. According to its own figures, GayRomeo has more than 873,200 registered profiles and 642,000[1] active users worldwide and is the biggest German-speaking chat and dating community for gay, bisexual and transgender men in the web.

Because of its German origins the majority of GayRomeo's users come from the German-speaking countries Germany, Austria and Switzerland. However, since the site is also available in English, Spanish, French, Italian, Dutch, Swedish and Portuguese, the number of users from non-German-speaking countries is constantly increasing.

In order to expand the international services of GayRomeo and in order to avoid legal problems with the comparatively strict German laws for the protection of children and young people [2], GayRomeo has been operated by PlanetRomeo B.V. located in Amsterdam, the Netherlands since September 2006.

Users who prefer to keep the site layout strictly non-sexual and inconspicuous, can use a graphical neutral version and a small GayRomeo-messenger available under www.planetromeo.com . This can be helpful while using GayRomeo from any gay-unfriendly public spaces like offices, hotels or an internet-cafés.

Social coverage and impact

In Germany, due to its high number of registered users, GayRomeo is often called the "Gay Registry Office" (schwules Einwohnermeldeamt) or "The Blue pages" (Die blauen Seiten), referring to the well known telephone directories the yellow pages and the white pages. Of course not every gay man is registered on GayRomeo, but GayRomeo reaches almost every social and professional class and includes people from all walks of life. In a satirical reference to the Nazis’ compilation of lists of homosexual men in the 1930’s, the German newspaper "Taz" announced: "The pink lists are back".[3].

Just like general Internet use, the use of GayRomeo varies depending on age, education level and other criteria. Even politicians are known to use the services of GayRomeo. For example, member of the German Parliament Volker Beck (Green Party) offered virtual consulting hours on GayRomeo during the election campaigns of 2005.

Influence on the gay scene

The increasing popularity of GayRomeo and other chat and dating websites has had a great impact on the general social behaviour of gay and bisexual men and their subculture. Traditional cruising areas like parks, motorway picnic areas, public toilets etc. are nowadays much less busy than they used to be. Dating via the internet reflects a need for more security. Many men prefer to have the opportunity to check out sexual compatibility through chatting before meeting someone in real life.

At the same time, gay cafés, bars, clubs, saunas etc in traditionally popular gay centres have become less popular in recent years while web services have thrived. There may be no direct correlation between these two trends as other social factors certainly play a role: high prices; an aging population and the increased integration of gays in wider society all play a role. Over the past 10 years the increase in popularity of large scale parties has no doubt also had a negative impact on smaller bars and clubs.

Countering social isolation

Active Users by Country
Country User
Germany 314,545
Italy 40,136
France 30,130
Switzerland 27,876
Spain 22,639
Austria 22,146
Netherlands 16,728
Britain 15,122
Belgium 12,219
USA 10,758
Thailand 8,340
Greece 7,573
Romania 7,069
Poland 6,875
Hungary 5,720
Turkey 5,582
Serbia 5,326
Philippines 4,722
Indonesia 4,542
Croatia 3,325
Mexico 3,001
Other 67,145
Worldwide 641,623
Registered profiles[4] 873,200
January 20th 2009

One key reason for the constantly increasing popularity of GayRomeo and other web services seems to be the permanent availability of date and sex partners no matter if you are at home, at work, in a hotel or an internet café regardless of where you are in the world. Some behavioural theories say that websites like GayRomeo support the social isolation of individuals and can lead to a form of addiction. According to these theories addicted internet users neglect their social contacts in the "real" world while not establishing or maintaining appropriate new contacts. The original motivation to build up new social contacts with people of similar interests via the internet can lead to an endlessly repeated search for new friends.

The other side to this coin is that services like GayRomeo can provide a lifeline to men living in isolated areas, cities or even countries where there is little or no established gay community. GayRomeo has proved especially important for gay men in small cities and villages as for them it is much harder to find other gay men or in their area. Certainly many valuable friendships and relationships have came about due to GayRomeo and other web services.

Controversies on GayRomeo

Real vs fake

Fake or inaccurate user profiles are a known problem in web communities. The anonymous nature of the internet allows people to create inaccurate or fictional profiles for themselves. [5] Age and body type are the areas of information that are most commonly misreported, but profile may also contain photos that have been retouched or that are of third parties. Some users may even create several different profiles according to different preferences and moods. As a protection against fakers GayRomeo employs an interactive system whereby users can mark each other's profiles as "personally known". The more a profile has been saved as "known", the higher the credibility of the profile and its owner.

Fakers on GayRomeo can also be reported through a system of user feedback and are quickly removed from the site. In general therefore the GayRomeo community is only slightly influenced by fakers.

Safer sex

Gay Dating Websites have been linked to an elevation of risk for acquiring HIV and other STI's when compared to other methods of meeting partners. [6]Some sites have even been created specifically for men who are looking for bareback (unprotected) sex partners. To counter this trend GayRomeo offers detailed and high-profile information about safer sex, the risks associated with barebacking and other sexually transmitted diseases. Reflecting its community roots GayRomeo also freely gives its own point of view about such issues.

Contact information for HIV/AIDS support groups and organisations in Germany, Austria, Switzerland is also provided on the website. There is no censoring of user profiles that promote unsafe sex or barebacking, but in their profiles users have the option to state their position regarding safer sex to indicate whether they always or never practise safer sex or whether the issue for them requires discussion.

In addition to the health information available on the site, in February 2007 GayRomeo launched a live and online health advise service in cooperation with Germany's national NGO for HIV/Aids issues Deutsche Aids-Hilfe. The online supporters are trained in questions of health and healthcare, and all user's enquires are dealt with in the strictest confidence. In this way users are offered the same level of service as when Deutsche Aids-Hilfe do their outreach work in gay bars, clubs and saunas.

Using GayRomeo

Personal profiles

To access GayRomeo users create an individual profile which typically includes a simple physical description and one or more photographs of themselves. Sexual preferences, cultural interests and hobbies can be added optionally. GayRomeo is exclusively for men (gay, bisexual or transgendered) of eighteen years or older. Profiles of other users are removed as are profiles that contain commercial or illegal content.

The purpose of a personal profile is to present a user in an accurate and attractive way to others for chatting, dating or for sex. It is interesting to note that many users do not see GayRomeo primarily as a tool for sexual encounters but as a new way of making and keeping in touch with friends.

GayRomeo differs from some other internet forums in that it is not a Chatroom in the traditional sense. Messages sent between two users cannot be seen by other users and can only be sent from one user to another. Its function therefore is similar to a messenger.

Clubs and guide entries

Aside from personal messaging, GayRomeo offers users the chance to create clubs-profiles and guide-entries as another way of getting in touch with gay men sharing similar interests. For example the regular customers of a bar or sauna can link their private profile to the club or guide-profile of that place. Members of a particular club can exchange news or discuss diverse subjects in the club’s forum or via a newsletter. Clubs also exist for supporters of political parties, members of religious groups and employees in particular industries. There are also clubs that are more sex or fetish orientated such as a club for men who like men with big ears. There are also fan-clubs for pop or movie stars, classical music etc. In fact, since any user can create a club-profile, the list is limitless.

Community information

Reflecting its community ethos GayRomeo also includes a lot of information regarding safer sex, coming out, health support as well as links to gay magazines and other community organizations. All these functions are free on GayRomeo. Unlike most other gay dating websites, users with a free account can send and receive as many messages as they wish.

Plus accounts

Some additional features are reserved for users who upgrade to a so called "plus"-account such as customized profile design, picture search and SSL-encrypted log-in. The plus-account has a small monthly charge. As GayRomeo is almost free of advertising, the site is mainly financed by those plus-users.

References

  1. ^ GayRomeo Statistics
  2. ^ Gayromeo Statement concerning the German Youth Protection Law
  3. ^ Die Tagezeitung - Gefährlich hoher Datingfaktor (in German)
  4. ^ GayRomeo Statistics
  5. ^ Davies, Scott W: "I Liked Your Profile: Experiences in Gay Online Dating", page 7. iUniverse, 2005
  6. ^ Halkitis, Wilton & Drescher: "Barebacking: Psychosocial and Public Health Approaches", page 20. Haworth Medical Press, 2006

Further reading