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Photos needed

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This article needs photographs of the designer's works (especially product and industrial design). The subject is visual arts related so the lack of supporting imagery seems a loss. Cheers, Cl3phact0 (talk) 08:34, 12 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Plagiarized sections

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Hello fellow Wikipedia editors,

The "Early life and education" section of this article contains several sentences directly plagiarized from the single source cited in this section. The edit history shows that this information was added 19:16, 21 April 2017‎ . Please revise this section to avoid plagiarizing the source cited. HaleyJones95 (talk) 20:05, 28 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Well spotted. I've done a quick trim to remove the obvious copyvio. The whole article is somewhat of a mess and could use a through revision by someone with expert knowledge and a sharp eye. -- Cl3phact0 (talk) 21:09, 28 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]
In addition to this, I feel much of the article as I first read it was very very similar to the article here [1] Vera.Grace (talk) 11:41, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Who was the other woman?

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The Guardian article that supports the claim that Aulenti was "one of only two women in a class of 20" (to graduate from PoliMilano in '54 with an architecture degree, etc.) doesn't say who the other was. It might be interesting to include that detail if a source can be found. -- Cl3phact0 (talk) 15:24, 29 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I could not find it anywhere and there was little information about her private life. Vera.Grace (talk) 11:42, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review

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GA toolbox
Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Gae Aulenti/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Nominator: Vera.Grace (talk · contribs) 11:49, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: Rollinginhisgrave (talk · contribs) 13:58, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Hey, I'll review this over the next few days. Looks like a really interesting topic, and I can already see you've done a lot of great work to improve it. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 13:58, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks once again for looking at it. :-) Vera.Grace (talk) 22:40, 2 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Starting this off now. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 03:44, 3 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Prose and content

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  • Starting off, you should just make the introduction part of the lede. MOS:LEADLENGTH states Few well-written leads will be shorter than about 100 words and the introduction would serve this purpose well. You can then cut out the second sentence Aulenti was one of the prominent female architects in post-war Italy.

Understood and done.

  • modern movement is there a reason you call it modern movement instead of modernism?

Only that it seemed to be more frequently used in the references. Done.

  • I'll have a look at the lede again after you merge the introduction and avoid doubling up information.

OK

  • Is there a reason the infobox uses MMDDYYYY while the article body uses DDMMYYYY?

No. Being Austrlian I naturally use ddmmyyyy but I did forgot to change the box. Done.

  • She was named "Gaetana Emilia" This was her surname? Or her middle name?

Yes, I found two references to her middle name, one being emilia and one being amelia. I could not figure out how to change the name in bold in the lead first sentence but I have added it to the info box. should I leave it out?

  • Aldo Aulenti and Zanotta comma after these

Done

  • The sentences are quite stubby, and would be made more readable by adding conjunctions. An example of two sentences that could be joined is Her father, Aldo Aulenti was an accountant. Her mother was a school teacher.

Done and checking for this throughout.

  • in the midst of this traditionally male-dominated industry I would cut this, unless it was directly being commented on.

Done

  • Gloss Olivetti

Not sure what this means.

  • Buenos Aires respectively

Done

  • This was the beginning of the design Pipistrello lamp I don't understand what this means, could you clarify? It also seems at odds with the caption Pipstrello lamp designed for Martinelli Luce (1965)

I understood it was designed in '65 but it was produced for general sale at a later time - I could not find exactly when. So you are right it doesn't really make sense.

Done.

  • collaboration -> collaborating

Done.

  • Aulenti was one of the Italian designers who produced designs active voice would make this more clear

Done.

  • A lot of the Industrial Design section seems to follow WP:PROSELINE. The article's writing would be improved by grouping sentences into paragraphs, and relying less on a "In YYYY, Aulenti..."

Understood and done.

  • to design an iconic watch attribute

Done

  • The Gare d'Orsay (Orsay railway station) was built in 1900 in the neo-classical style. this seems at odds with our page, which for instance includes the line about Beaux-Arts architecture Together, these buildings, drawing upon Renaissance, Gothic and Romanesque and other non-classical styles, broke the monopoly of neoclassical architecture in Paris.

Changed to beaux-arts.

  • was selected winner of -> won

Done.

  • have a role in both the architectural plan and the understanding of the vision and requirements of the curators Can you clarify this? It isn't clear what the second half is saying.

Done.

  • In her book, Creating the Musée d'Orsay: The Politics of Culture in France (1998), Andrea Schneider quotes Aulenti you don't have to attribute this. You can just give the quote.

Done.

  • Aulenti's design invites visitors' movement along the long axis of the building as though it were a nave with galleries on either side. It is beautifully written, but perhaps not in the Wikipedia style. I would attribute the analogy to a nave. I would also avoid saying the design "invites".

Yep. Understood. Done.

  • Critical opinion of the success of Aulenti's design has varied in degree and over time. What is it now?

Done

  • arranged in a chronological order Step this out, avoid using chronological

Done - best as I can.

  • Following the completion of active voice (i.e. after completing)

Done

Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 03:44, 3 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, Thanks ever so much for your suggestions. I am working through them but will need a bit more time. I also added a bit more to the introduction. See if you think it summarises her philosophy properly. Vera.Grace (talk) 07:43, 4 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
In the second sentence of the lead, one of the few prominent female architects would better emphasise how rare this was at the time. -- Cl3phact0 (talk) 08:54, 4 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

[Continuing]

  • had wide ranging and international scope could you explain this to me? I think an article would be needed if it were kept, but I think it can be more succinct.

Done

  • In 1991, after Aulenti received two major commissions. One was a fix the grammar here

Done

  • theatre work expand

Done

  • Luca Ronconi gloss

I am not sure what would be a better image here because luca was a close colleague and friend of Aulenti.

  • highly architectural, evocative and innovative explain what this means, as I don't know what it means for a design to be architectural or what is being evoked.

Removed

  • She makes design reference to be consistent with the tense as in the previous sentence you were using past tense

Done

  • Her contribution moved stage design forward attribute this as it is editorialising (saying it's a good thing/progress)

Removed

  • Aulenti created on stage screens for the staging of I'm not sure what this means, could you clarify?

Done

  • be more involved in the experience make this more neutral (i.e. could better see)

Done

  • They also included videos of a royal procession previous filmed live on the street. I read this as the street outside the theatre, could you alter the writing to clarify?

Done

  • This was notable in its time attribute

Done

  • (1828–1906) you don't have to include the dates of when playwrights lived.

Done

  • ExhibitionsDa Puvis de Chavannes a Matisse e Picasso. Verso l'Arte Moderna (2002) at Palazzo Grassi I'm not sure what the grammar is supposed to be here.

Done

  • It continues will continue

Done

  • . The first was -> ":"

Done

  • Aulenti leaves a daughter and grandchildren reword so it doesn't read like an obituary. You don't need to mention that she had grandchildren. Just mention that she had at least one daughter

Done - see daughter in early life and education

done

  • commissioned to redesign you can reword this to "redesigned". It is only more notable that she was commissioned if she doesn't end up designing it, and if she does design it, it's assumed she was commissioned.

Ok.

I'm coming back to the lede here

  • Aulenti was one of the prominent one of the few?

Done

  • Sentences should be less choppy here.
  • She was a proponent of modernism.[6] However, these sentences should be combined

Done

  • Make the lede a summary of the body (put any material not in the body in the body)

I think I have now.

  • Add a footnote about the spelling of Emilia: you can use template:efn. You can see an example of how it's used in the article I'm working on history of chocolate.

In her biography it is emilia so I think the other spelling may be incorrect.

Suggestions

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done

  • to decrease the amount of natural reduce instead of decrease

done

  • Source 2 links to Palazzo del Quirinale, when I understand it should link to President of Italy

done

Sources

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Spot check

Gone - I didn't look into the site deeply enough. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Vera.Grace (talk • contribs) 10:14, 11 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Other

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  • Images
  • Why does "Locus solus" fall under CC0?

I found it on the Wikimedia creative commons?

  • Everything else looking good for attribution Green tickY
  • Broad / summary style Green tickY
  • COPYVIO/OR, 9.9% earwig, mainly museum names Green tickY
  • Neutral Green tickY
  • Stable Green tickY

Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 02:01, 5 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

A few additional comments for consideration:

  • The parenthetical date ranges for named individuals such as Ernesto Nathan Rogers (1909–1969), Henrik Ibsen (1828–1906), Pablo Picasso (1881–1973), etc. seem like an unnecessary distraction (as the information is readily available in the wikilinked articles and elsewhere).
  • The Pipistrello lamp [it] has a stand-alone article on Italian Wikipedia (which would probably stand-up to scrutiny for translation and importation). You may wish to link this to indicate a possible article addition (using WP:ILL with a redlink, per example above – if this is acceptable practice in a GA nomination).
  • If you choose to further develop the theme of Aulenti being a woman in what was (and to a degree, still is) a male-dominated field (see w:Category:Italian women architects vs. List of Italian architects), then a few of her contemporaries included Cini Boeri, Anna Castelli Ferrieri, Franca Helg, Franca Stagi, Nani Valle (wikidata:Q121010441), and Lella Vignelli, which may be information worth including in this article.
There are plenty of other talented female architects, but most of them seem to link up with men [...] I've always worked for myself, and it's been quite an education. – Aulenti quoted in Guardian obituary (see Wikiquote)

-- Cl3phact0 (talk) 16:15, 5 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Do you think Aulenti's position in the professional realm (as a woman) is worth a section on its own? From my reading, Aulenti never played the gender card, that is, she relied on her own work and not, I am different because I am a woman in a men's area. Vera.Grace (talk) 06:24, 6 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
I don't know that this theme merits a section of its own, but the article does mention that Aulenti was one of two women in the class of 20 at Politecnico, and the quote above indicates that it is something she thought about (it is also discussed in the recently published podcast discussion between Alice Rawsthorn and Paola Antonelli). In any case, this information isn't necessary for the GA review, so it could always be added at a later date if you (or another editor) feel it would improve the article. Cheers, Cl3phact0 (talk) 07:27, 6 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
  • Re: Aulenti's theatre work and collaboration with Luca Ronconi, I have added a few more references that may be of use for the "Stage and costume design" section (see Reference ideas on Talk page). In particular, this source states that she and Ronconi founded the workshop in Prato. (It also says that she worked with Claudio Abbado, and that she designed sets for La Scala in Milan – both of which seem like important details.)
  • In the same section, do we need the photo of Ronconi? It is a very nice picture, but it is already used in the article about him. I would prefer to see images of Aulenti's stage designs here (if these can be sourced). -- Cl3phact0 (talk) 07:44, 8 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
    More tomorrow but I have searched high and low for a CC photo of her stage designs. There is a video of them but I am pretty sure I could not take a screen shot of that and use it. Vera.Grace (talk) 09:21, 8 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
  • In my view, the information about the Poltronova [it] Sgarsul chair belongs in the "Industrial design" sub-section rather than the "Milan Triennial" sub-section. Also, the (excellent) Domus source does not mention the Locus solus pieces (nor, despite appearances, is the pictured chair from that collection actually a rocking chair). Perhaps this and the photo of a Thonet rocking chair (which, again in my view, seems superfluous) could be trimmed? -- Cl3phact0 (talk) 09:19, 10 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
    Hi, yes, I was wondering what you would think on that on the thonet chair. I was thinking to show the similarity in, or the origin of the design. What sort of chairs are they? I will ditch the Thoney picture.
    I am going to go carefully back through the references as soon as I have time to make sure they are correct and sound. I am a bit busy at present, so please bear with me.
    Ronconi photo is gone but I cannot find another photograph for theater work with the correct license.
    I am in Australia GMT +10 so if I don't reply right away I might be asleep ;-)
    Also, it is very foreign to me to begin a sentence with a verb eg Hailing from Idaho, he went to school for ten years ... especially when the clauses are unrelated. I thought I would explain that is why I don't use them. I know it is fine for a lot of people.
    Vera.Grace (talk) 23:51, 10 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
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