Talk:Jake Long
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Family Info
Given the subjects famous father and mother (is it really teri hatcher?) I think a short family reference section should be added.
- I think you're probably refering to Chris Long. G LeTourneau (talk) 20:12, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
- I have added a family section and am going to look for a hatnote to clarify this.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 14:28, 5 October 2009 (UTC)
NFL
He's the projected #1 pick in the 2008 draft. How can there be nothing about this?
He was drafted first?
Funny; not only does this article give information on events that have not yet happened, it proclaims to be psychic. I'm rewording this thing. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 67.180.11.77 (talk) 08:33, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
I don't think Long's membership in a minor student group is notable. Its inclusion here seems like promotion. TheMile (talk) 02:19, 28 April 2008 (UTC)
"Family"
The section "Family" should be renamed "Personal Life" and moved after the "Professional Career" section like many other NFL players bios. --Octa62 (talk) 05:36, 26 September 2009 (UTC)
All-Rookie Source
The infobox says he was named to the PFW All-Rookie team with a link to Pro Football Weekly, but the article has a source saying he was named to the Pro Football Writers Association All-Rookie team. Is this a contradiction or was he named to both?--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 14:26, 5 October 2009 (UTC)
3rd tackle to be 1st overral pick
According to espn: The only other offensive lineman taken with the No. 1 choice since 1970 was Ohio State tackle Orlando Pace [1]. The list of first overall picks in the NFL only mentions another offensive tackle selected 1st overall, Ron Yary in 1968, and a couple of Centers before that. --Octa62 (talk) 16:49, 6 October 2009 (UTC)
GA Review
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Jake Long/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Wizardman 06:34, 20 November 2009 (UTC) I'll be reviewing the article. Here's a couple things to start you off while I read through the article:
- The two citation needed tags need to be remedied.
- Fixed.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 05:55, 21 November 2009 (UTC)
- The final two references can't be bare URLs.
- Fixed.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 06:02, 21 November 2009 (UTC)
Here's the rest of the review:
- The family section at the beginning feels out of place. The first sentence I'd mince into the early years section, and the second/third I'd put into the personal section.
- "In Long's first start as a varsity basketball player on December 4, 2001," What class status (i.e. sophomore)?
- The previous sentence says "As a junior that football season". Thus, once basketball season comes around a month later, he is still a junior. This seems clear to me.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 06:13, 21 November 2009 (UTC)
- "Long led the basketball team to a second consecutive undefeated Metro League championship season," I don't see the first one mentioned in the article, only the 17-3 finish.
- It says "That season he helped lead Lapeer East to an unbeaten 14–0 Metro League record (17–3) overall" so this was mentioned.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 06:16, 21 November 2009 (UTC)
- Ref #4 (GoBlue, the bare url) is a deadlink.
- I removed most of the challengeable portion of the sentence. His record was broken a few years later from what I can tell by a Mike Carson.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 06:30, 21 November 2009 (UTC)
- "Under the new coordinator and with newly sculpted fitter athletes the offensive scheme was shifted to concentrate on the zone blocking system, like that used by the Denver Broncos when they won back-to-back Super Bowls and by the Atlanta Falcons to help Warrick Dunn achieve a career high in rushing yards" This feels wordy, plus I'm not positive about its necessity.
- Is it any better now?--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:09, 25 November 2009 (UTC)
- "The Dolphins hired new coach Tony Sparano and employed Bill Parcells as Executive Vice President in charge of football operations." It's a rather jarring transition, jumping from Long and the O-line to Sparano and back to Long. Tweak how this area is set up.
- Is that better?--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:05, 25 November 2009 (UTC)
- Refs #121 and 122 (nfl and yahoo for the draft) need fixing up; bot generated bare links.
- Fixed.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 21:45, 25 November 2009 (UTC)
- You must mention that OSU is clearly superior to Michigan at least three times in the college section. (Not really, just adding in some humor to the process ^_^)
That's all I got; I'll put it on hold and pass upon completion. Wizardman 19:36, 25 November 2009 (UTC)
- Looks much better now, so I'm passing this as a GA. Wizardman 00:33, 26 November 2009 (UTC)
Fireworks
Saying the fire was started by fireworks on that landed on the porch leaves the reader wondering why they landed on the couch and what was going on to have fireworks in the neighborhood on a random night. Please do not remove the reference to the Pistons celebration.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 01:19, 12 August 2010 (UTC)
The information is unnecessary and makes the section read more cluttered. Please do not readd the reference to the Pistons celebration. There is no reason to fight on such a minor point when I am trying to improve this article. JimmyBallgame 18:44, 24 August 2010 (UTC)
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