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Talk:Dan Runzler

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GA Review

[edit]
This review is transcluded from Talk:Dan Runzler/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Muboshgu (talk · contribs) 21:03, 1 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I have not significantly contributed to this page. I'll review. – Muboshgu (talk) 21:03, 1 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. I'll keep an eye on it! Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 19:32, 2 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed
Infobox
  • Add spaces around the slash in the position field.
Lead
  • The word "currently" is unnecessary. MOS:CURRENTLY guides against using language that can become outdated. Saying that he is the pitching coach for the Milkmen will suffice.
  • It's good to include ERAs and the link in the lead, add a link to win-loss record (pitching) to explain that stat.
  • [[2012 World Series|World Series]] is an WP:EASTEREGG. I'd expect the link based on displayed text to point to World Series.
  • He did not pitch at all for San Francisco in 2013 and 2014 --> He did not pitch for San Francisco in 2013 and 2014
  • Per MOS:JOBTITLES, Director of Pitching Development should be lower case.
  • What is Sirious Baseball?
Early years
  • Chaminade Catholic is in Los Angeles in the San Fernando Valley, which is different from Santa Monica and should be included, unless I am mistaken (L.A. County geography is a bit odd to me.)
  • Technically, the positions are "first baseman" and "right fielder" while "first base" and "right field" are places on the field.
  • he was the only junior ballplayer at Chaminade that had not reached the varsity team You mean the only junior (education)? Because it could read as junior varsity.
  • Gubicza finally added Runzler to the varsity team–though as a pitcher. "Finally" strikes me as MOS:EDITORIAL. Is there anything to add about why Gubicza put him on the varsity team? Was Gubicza the one who suggested he try pitching?
  • Link starting pitcher
  • pitching out of the bullpen --> pitching as a relief pitcher
  • On August 1, he entered a game against the Chatham Athletics in the sixth inning with the bases loaded, two outs, and the Kettleers clinging to a 1–0 lead. Runzler struck out Doug Pickens, ending the threat and preserving the lead in an eventual 2–1 victory that clinched the Western Division title for Cotuit. What's the significance of this? Did it increase his draft stock? Is it noteworthy that his Cape Cod League team won the division? I'm considering the 2007 tournament details also, though that seems far more relevant to me.
    • It's one of the only articles that really featured his collegiate performance in any game I can find. Thus, in terms of media coverage, it seems more significant than all the others. And yes, I think it's definitely notable that his Cape Cod League team won the division. Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 14:06, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • which resulted in an improved performance by him reads as ungrammatical to me. Can we add more about why his performance was better as a reliever than a starter?
Minor leagues (2007–09)
  • Per MOS:NUMERAL, spell out numbers nine or less.
  • sent down --> demoted
  • I see that the phrase attacking hitters is taken from the source. I understand what it means, but it's baseball jargon, so please rewrite.
  • Eastern League (baseball) is a redirect to Eastern League, a dab page. Please fix the link.
  • Why is the TYIB award in quotes? Looks like MOS:SCAREQUOTES.

Other sections to follow. – Muboshgu (talk) 19:33, 6 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Major leagues (2009–12)
  • to play minor league ball too colloquial
  • His ERA was 5.00 --> He had a 5.00 ERA
  • In the July 8 contest, against the Brewers, Runzler relieved Santiago Casilla with one out in the sixth, the bases loaded, and San Francisco clinging to a 6–3 lead. He struck out Joe Inglett for the second out, then retired pinch-hitter Ryan Braun on a groundout to end the inning. Looking to leave him in for the seventh, Giants manager Bruce Bochy allowed him to have his first MLB at bat in the bottom of the inning. Facing David Riske, Runzler fouled a ball off his knee. Unable to finish the at bat, he was placed on the disabled list with a fractured left patella. Too much detail. Please trim to keep only what is essential, which is that he was allowed to bat and got hurt. Also add an appropriate link for patella or patella fracture.
    • We are also going to record that he got out of the previous inning without allowing any runs to score; that was one of his most notable appearances of the season. I have, however, trimmed the detail down for this section. Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 14:15, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • though he only made five appearances for the rest of the season, he did not allow a run --> he made five more appearances without allowing a run or something like that
  • Same easter egg issue with the 2010 WS link.
  • began 2011 --> began the 2011 season
  • Reading Baggerly's 2011 piece, it's clear to me that experimented with using him as a starter is inaccurate, as he says they were doing it for the innings.
  • Runzler was called on to make a spot start --> Runzler was used as a spot starter or Runzler made a spot start
  • There's a WP:CITEBOMB there ([2][16][22][23][24]). Please move them around, I see that one of them is a source on Surkamp coming up in August, so it doesn't cover September callups, for example.
  • Runzler had to exit the final game --> Runzler exited the final game
  • Did he require surgery for the torn lat muscle, or rest and rehabilitation?
  • 2012 spring training --> spring training in 2012
  • "Rehabbed" is too colloquial, he rehabilitated the injury
  • He pitched scoreless ball in six outings --> He pitched in six games without allowing a run
  • Add that he was not on the postseason roster, and fix the 2012 WS link.
  • Also, too much use of "he" in the last paragraph of this section, mix in his name more
Minor leagues (2013–14)
  • An unlikely candidate to make the Giants roster in 2013, as the ballclub already had three left-handed relievers, I think you're adhering too closely with the source here, as it says Runzler was a long shot to make the team, which already boasts three left-handed relievers. It's a little borderline on close paraphrasing. We could benefit with more context. Did the Giants bring in another lefty as a free agent? Who else is he competing with and why was he below them on the depth chart?
  • His goodbye tweet is too banal to include, and inaccurate since he didn't leave the org yet because he was outrighted.
Orix Buffaloes
Journeyman (#1)
  • We can't have two sections with the same name per MOS:HEADINGS.
  • Invited to Arizona's spring training or not? I should assume not because the Twins did and that is explicitly stated?
  • Please change at least one paragraph so that the two in the section don't both start with "On DATE, Runzler signed a minor league contract with the..."
Pittsburgh Pirates
  • Indianapolis was in the IL, not the PCL.
  • How important is that October 1 game? If a random game is only sourced to a BRef box score, I question inclusion.
    • It's his last MLB appearance. 14:32, 9 January 2022 (UTC)
Journeyman (#2)
  • Also the same proseline problem of "On DATE, Runzler signed..."
  • He would spend --> He spent whatever tense that is is a pet peeve of mine, see WP:INTOTHEWOULDS
  • When did he join the Skeeters in 2018?
  • 2019 spring training invite or no?
  • change "impact of COVID-19" to "impact of the COVID-19 pandemic", or just "the COVID-19 pandemic"
    • "Pandemic" is a pet peeve of mine - I won't use that word in articles I work on. (If you have strong feelings about this, you can put it in yourself, but I've used "impact" in other GA's before without there being a problem.) 14:35, 9 January 2022 (UTC)
Career statistics
  • I don't think this needs to be its own section, and see above re: testing him out as a starting pitcher.
  • Though the Giants once thought he might be a closer, That comes out of left field and should be included much earlier in his career if true. I'm iffy on Bleacher Report reporting.
Pitching style
  • The DFA source does not validate the idea that he was viewed as a future closer
Personal life and coaching career
Images
  • Tagged as free, useful in illustrating the subject

That's my review. Article on hold for a minimum of a week. – Muboshgu (talk) 21:46, 8 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

All looks to be in order. I realize that some of my call outs are probably more in line with featured article reviews than good article. Passing now. – Muboshgu (talk) 01:35, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]