Talk:Eddie Sheldrake
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A fact from Eddie Sheldrake appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 16 November 2024 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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Did you know nomination
[edit]- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Theleekycauldron talk 07:10, 8 November 2024 (UTC)
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that before selling KFC and pies, the 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake played basketball under coach John Wooden and broke UCLA's single-game scoring record?
- Source: "Polly’s Pies will hop back in time this week as the a local comfort food and pie chain ... Her grandfather, Eddie Sheldrake, co-founded the chain with his brother Don with their first restaurant in Fullerton in 1968 after they decided to expand from being Kentucky Fried Chicken franchisees to opening an original restaurant" (Press-Telegram) "This Angeleno is something of an oddity in basketbalL, as it is played these days, for he is a little runt of five feet-nine" (Press-Telegram) "Eddie Sheldrake, a longtime friend of Wooden, was a sophomore in his first year on the Bruins varsity the season the coach arrived." (John Wooden : An American Treasure) "The five-foot nine-inch forward broke the Southern Division basketball scoring record for a single game when he tallied 38 points in leading his team to a 90-67 triumph over Stanford Saturday night. Sheldrake’s total also broke the UCLA school record held Jointly by Don Barksdale and Bill O’Brien, with 30 points." (Citizen-News)
—Bagumba (talk) 16:43, 29 September 2024 (UTC).
- Hi @Bagumba: This article, created on the 29 September, is new enough, long enough, well-sourced, BLP-compliant, copyvio free, neutral, and presentable. The hook is cited and the QPQ is done.
- My only problem would be that this hook is a bit busy/unfocused. I'd like workshop it a bit. Might I suggest "... that before selling chicken and pies, 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake broke UCLA's single-game scoring record in basketball?". Best, Tenpop421 (talk) 12:24, 1 November 2024 (UTC)
- @Tenpop421: If we're simplifying the basketball portion. I think there's more cachet to mentioning the legendary coach Wooden. And I'd prefer the globally-recognized KFC over chicken. I propose:
- ALT1 ... that before selling KFC and pies, the 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake played basketball under UCLA coach John Wooden?—Bagumba (talk) 17:15, 1 November 2024 (UTC)
- @Bagumba: I think "selling KFC" is not incorrect, but it is a bit awkward. He ran a KFC, which sold chicken, and he ran Polly's Pies, which sold pies. We wouldn't say "selling KFC and Polly's Pies". The phrase "selling KFC" implies, to me, selling a company. Subjectively, as a person who isn't so into basketball, its more interesting to hear that a person broke a record themselves than that they were coached by someone renowned. But the latter fact might be more remarkable, I just don't know enough about the sport. Best, Tenpop421 (talk) 17:53, 1 November 2024 (UTC)
- ALT2 ... that before selling pies and KFC chicken, the 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake played basketball under UCLA coach John Wooden?
- ALT3 ... that before selling fried chicken and pies, the 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake played basketball under UCLA coach John Wooden?
- @Tenpop421: How about ALT2 (preferably) or ALT3?—Bagumba (talk) 12:55, 3 November 2024 (UTC)
- @Bagumba: I prefer ALT3, but I'll let whoever closes the DYK decide. I'm satisfied that these ALTs are sharper than the original hook. Good to go. Best, Tenpop421 (talk) 13:03, 3 November 2024 (UTC)
- I'll also add my ALT for completeness's sake. Tenpop421 (talk) 15:37, 3 November 2024 (UTC)
- ALT4: ... that before selling chicken and pies, 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake broke UCLA's single-game scoring record in basketball?
- @Bagumba: I think "selling KFC" is not incorrect, but it is a bit awkward. He ran a KFC, which sold chicken, and he ran Polly's Pies, which sold pies. We wouldn't say "selling KFC and Polly's Pies". The phrase "selling KFC" implies, to me, selling a company. Subjectively, as a person who isn't so into basketball, its more interesting to hear that a person broke a record themselves than that they were coached by someone renowned. But the latter fact might be more remarkable, I just don't know enough about the sport. Best, Tenpop421 (talk) 17:53, 1 November 2024 (UTC)
- ALT1 ... that before selling KFC and pies, the 5-foot-9-inch (1.75 m) Eddie Sheldrake played basketball under UCLA coach John Wooden?—Bagumba (talk) 17:15, 1 November 2024 (UTC)
- @Tenpop421: If we're simplifying the basketball portion. I think there's more cachet to mentioning the legendary coach Wooden. And I'd prefer the globally-recognized KFC over chicken. I propose:
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