List of faux pas

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Common or notable faux pas in various cultures include:


Africa

Ghana

  • When greeting people in a home, it is considered improper if the guest ignores any person present. Guests are expected to acknowledge and greet every person at a social occasion, including children and babies, by shaking hands. When shaking hands, it is appropriate for the guest to first greet the person on his/her right-hand side and work their way left. This ensures that the guest's palm makes contact with the palm of the person receiving the handshake - touching the back of the hand instead of the palm is considered insulting. Guests are expected to begin by greeting the most elderly person present. The same ritual is expected to be observed upon leaving as well as arriving.
  • In Ghana, asking a person to a social event (e.g. a bar or restaurant) implies that the person offering the invite will be paying for everything. Inviting a person out and then expecting them to pay for their own drinks, etc is considered extremely rude.

South Africa

  • It is the custom to look someone in the eye whenever touching glasses for a toast. Varying superstitious results can follow should you not do so.
  • Never interfere with another man's braai (barbeque). Don't even make recommendations on cooking method or style unless you are a close friend. (Even relatives may not comment.)

Arab countries

  • Throughout most of the Middle East the left hand is reserved for bodily hygiene and considered unclean. Thus, the right hand should be used for eating. Shaking hands with one's left hand is considered an insult.[1]
  • Public displays of affection toward women are frowned upon. [2]
  • Displaying the soles of one's feet or touching somebody with one's shoes. [3]
  • In Iraq, the "Thumbs Up" gesture is considered an offensive insult. [4]
  • In some Arab cultures, it is considered disrespectful to not stand when speaking to elders or when they enter a room. Similarly it is expected that elders will be the first to be greeted and served in social gatherings. [5]
  • Entering the living room with shoes on is considered rude. [6]
  • In some Middle Eastern countries it is considered rude for an individual to step away when another individual is stepping closer. [7]
  • In most Arab countries, it is considered polite and a sign of friendship to hold hands when walking. This does not have the romantic connotations it does in the West. [8]
  • Bringing all five fingers together with the fingers pointing upwards is a sign meaning - slow down, give me five minutes. It should not be mistaken for a fist and a show of threat.

South and East Asia

  • Confusing or thoughtlessly considering groups of very distinct Asian peoples (eg: Japanese, Chinese, Koreans etc) as "all the same" is considered rude and impolite. [9]

Bangladesh

  • While it is acceptable for men to shake hands in greetings, women are only permitted to nod. [10]
  • Eating should be done with only the right hand. [11]
  • The American thumbs up gesture is considered obscene. [12]

China, Taiwan

Faux pas derived from Mandarin pronunciation

The following faux pas are derived from Mandarin pronunciations (with Hanyu Pinyin noted), so they may also apply in other Chinese-speaking areas:

  • Giving someone a timepiece, such as a clock or a watch, as a gift is a very unlucky faux pas. Traditional superstitions regard this as counting the seconds to the recipient's death. Another common interpretation of this is that the phrase "to gift a clock" (Chinese: 送鐘, Chinese: 送钟) in Chinese is pronounced "sòng zhōng" in Mandarin, which is a homophone of a phrase for "terminating" or "attending a funeral" (both can be written as 送終 (traditional) or 送终 (simplified)). Cantonese people consider such gift as a curse. [13]
  • Giving someone a fan or an umbrella as a gift is frequently unfriendly. The words fan "shàn" (扇) and umbrella "sǎn" (Chinese: , Chinese: ) sounds like the word "sàn" (散), meaning scatter or to lose. "sàn kāi" (Chinese: 散開, Chinese: 散开) means to split up. [14]
  • As a book (simplified Chinese: ; traditional Chinese: ; pinyin: shū) is a Mandarin homophone of a loss (simplified Chinese: ; traditional Chinese: ; pinyin: shū), carrying or reading (looking at) a book (simplified Chinese: 带书, 看书; traditional Chinese: 帶書, 看書; pinyin: dài shū, kàn shū) when betting, such as gambling or investing in stocks, may be considered an unlucky faux pas while being homophones of carrying or looking at a loss (simplified Chinese: 带输, 看输; traditional Chinese: 帶輸, 看輸; pinyin: dài shū, kàn shū). This unlucky faux pas does not apply to carrying or reading newspapers (simplified Chinese: 带报, 看报; traditional Chinese: 帶報, 看報; pinyin: dàibào, kànbào) as newspapers (simplified Chinese: 报纸; traditional Chinese: 報紙; pinyin: bàozhǐ) are not books. [15]
  • Traditionally, the bride gives her parents a fan, symbolizing that she is leaving them for her husband. (Chinese society is traditionally patrilocal.) [16]
  • Sharing a pear with your loved ones is unlucky. "Sharing a pear" (分梨) is a homophone of "separate" (Chinese: 分離, Chinese: 分离), both pronounced "fēnlí" in Mandarin. Sharing with distant friends is okay. [17]
  • When eating at a reunion dinner on the eve of the Chinese New Year, eating fish completely is widely considered an unlucky faux pas. See Reunion dinner for the reason why partially eaten fish is customarily to be stored overnight. [18]

Other faux pas

  • In Chinese culture gifts should be given in pairs because odd numbers imply separation and loneliness.[19] The exception is the number four, which is considered extremely unlucky, as "four" sounds similar to "dead".
  • It is considered polite to decline a gift when it is first offered and the giver is expected to offer it multiple times. Also the gifts are generally not opened in the giver's presence.
  • Giving a married man green-colored head wear as a gift is unfriendly. The Chinese saying "wearing a green hat" (Chinese: 戴綠帽, Chinese: 戴绿帽, Pinyin: dài lǜmào) means that someone's wife is unfaithful. The gift would be an insult to the couple.[20]
  • At a dinner table, always serve the oldest person at the table first. If you do not know their age, serve the guest first. It is very important to show respect to the elders.
  • Sticking your chopsticks into your rice and leave them standing there is a very unlucky faux pas. This looks like sticks of incense in a bowl used to honor dead ancestors, and such a symbol of death is extremely offensive at the dinner table. In Cantonese funeral tradition, a pair of chopsticks is used to stick a salt-preserved duck egg into a bowl of rice on the altar as an offering to the deceased. [21]
  • Attending a Cantonese wedding while you are still in mourning for a death in the family is unlucky. It is believed to bring bad luck to the marrying couple. [22]
  • Tapping ones chopsticks against the side of a bowl imitates the gesture of beggars on the street, and is considered a sign of extreme hunger or impatience, similar to banging fork and knife on the table.

India

  • It is advisable for men and women to avoid wearing revealing clothes in public. For women, bikinis, short skirts, and dresses with exposed shoulders are frowned upon. Shorts should be avoided by both genders, if possible. A plain white sari / dress should be avoided by women as it is the traditional wear of a widow in mourning.
  • Entering the "pooja" room of a house (where the altar of the gods is placed) with shoes on is considered impolite in Indian culture.
  • In most Indian homes, shoes are not permitted beyond the foyer. Keeping with Indian norms hospitality, the hosts will never object if you do walk in with shoes (especially foreigners). Though it is appreciated if the guests do take their shoes off before entering. If it is a traditional floor-sit-down dinner, then the shoes most definitely must come off.
  • Since the foot is considered an impure part of the body, it should not come in contact with any other being; or items of respect like coins, currency, books, paper etc. The accepted norm of apologizing for this is touching the object / person with your right hand and placing the hand on one's forehead.
  • While dining in an Indian household, food will be offered multiple times. Guests are expected to at least taste whats being offered as a sign of good manners. This stems from the fact that Indians go as guests, they generally decline offered drinks /food and expect to be offered multiple times before they accept.
  • It is considered immature and hoggish to open a gift in front of the person who has given it. This is in stark contrast to many Western cultures. Gifts are opened in private.
  • As in many other countries, India with all its varied languages has three versions of you (polite, friendly and informal forms, see T-V distinction) in every language - not using them appropriately can be a cause of lot of disapproving frowns.
  • Accepting goods or making payments with the left hand (the left hand is considered unfit and dirty). The right hand should always be used.
  • Often, calling someone older than you by their first name can be offensive. Either avoid using the name during conversation or use Mr./Ms./Mrs. <Last name>.
  • It is considered condescending or patronizing to place the hands on the shoulders of an older person, especially someone from an older generation, unless the latter is a close friend.
  • It is customary to stand up when an older person enters the room. It is also impolite to sit on a chair / sofa if the elder person is sitting on the floor / carpet.
  • Many men / women in South Asia avoid shaking hands with individuals of the opposite gender. When meeting a person of the opposite gender, it is prudent to verbally greet and then wait to see if the other person extends the hand first.
  • Indians have had a complicated history with its neighbors (Pakistan, Bangladesh, Nepal, and Sri Lanka), and confusing an Indian with any of these is seriously offensive. This rule extends especially to Westerners.
  • For a man to comment to another person about the appearance of the latter's adult female relative (wife, sister, daughter, etc) is considered inappropriate behavior. However, it is okay for a woman to do so.
  • The appropriate response to "Thank You" is not "You're welcome" but rather "Mention Not."
  • Use of subtle sarcasm should be avoided initially since the barriers of language and cultural differences often make the humor harder to detect and your host may end up interpreting the words as displeasure or even insult.

Japan

  • Business cards should be accepted with both hands as a sign of deference. [23]
  • In Japanese culture it is considered polite to decline a gift when it is first offered and the giver is expected to offer it multiple times. Also the gifts are generally not opened in the giver's presence. [24]
  • In greeting or thanking another person, it is insulting if someone does not bow lower than the other person when the other person is older or has a higher social status. [25]
  • Guests entering a Japanese home are expected to remove their shoes in the foyer and have socks or stockings in good condition. [26]
  • Holding anything with chopsticks by two people at the same time, or passing an item from chopsticks to chopsticks is considered very impolite, as it will remind bystanders of the Japanese funeral ritual. Sticking them into food (and especially rice) has similar connotations. [27]
  • It is considered impolite for a person to pour their own drink. Generally an individual will offer to pour a companion's drink and the companion, in return will pour the individual's drink. [28]
  • It is considered impolite to drink in front of other people. When you take a drink you are to turn away from the people you are with. [29]
  • Blowing the nose in public (also, the Japanese do not use their handkerchief for hanakuso, literally 'nose shit') [30]
  • Not using polite language and honorifics when speaking with someone having a higher social status. (Though most Japanese are very lenient with Westerners in this regard.) [31]
  • Expressing outward anger, annoyance and losing a person temper causes them to lose face in Japanese culture. [32]
  • Not sending a New Year's postcard to someone who sent you one.
  • Sending a New Year's postcard to someone who suffered a death in the family during the past year.
  • Tipping is considered rude and is never done in Japan. However, gifts of cash at holidays (for example, otoshidama for New Year's Day) are considered acceptable, unlike in many Western countries.

South Korea

  • Wiping or blowing your nose in a restaurant, even if the food is spicy, is considered mildly offensive. It is expected that you should take a trip to the toilet if you need to do this.[33]
  • In Korean cultures, it is considered disrespectful to not stand when speaking to your elders or when they enter a room. Similarly it is expected that elders will be the first to be greeted and served in social gatherings. [34]
  • When entering a restaurant you are expected to take off your shoes and leave them by the door. Some modern, western style, restaurants are an exception. These can be identified as they have higher tables with chairs. This also includes walking into any homes in Korea.
  • In restaurants and bars, pouring your own drink is considered rude. You should keep an eye on your neighbors' glasses and fill them if they are empty. In return, they will fill your glass when it's empty.
  • When pouring drinks, hold bottle in right hand, lightly place left hand on forearm near elbow, as a sign of respect. Also when drinking your drink, turn head and look away and drink.

Thailand

  • In Thailand, wearing black outside of attending a funeral or mourning is a sign of bad luck. [35]
  • Touching somebody on the foot (in Buddhism the foot is the most impure region of the body). Strictly speaking this also applies to children.
  • Touching somebody on the head. Thais regard the head as the highest part of the body, literally and figuratively. If you accidentally touch someone’s head, offer an apology immediately. This doesn't apply to kids.
  • Stepping over or standing on bills or coins (money is another symbol of good fortune and prosperity) signifies disrespect. Currency usually depicts the King, and it is a sign of utmost disrespect to place your foot above the head of the King. Similarly, licking the back of a postage stamp - which also features the King's image - is also considered disrespectful. [36]
  • Pointing your sole or foot at somebody. Following the logic that the head is the most sacred part of the body, the foot is the least sacred. In Buddhist temples particularly, it is important to sit with the soles of your feet not pointing at the Buddha.
  • Kissing in the streets and any public display of affection are considered rude.

Malaysia

  • When eating with Malaysians, using your left hand to handle food is extremely impolite. For most Malaysians, the left hand is considered unclean.
  • Therefore, shaking hands should only be done with the right hand. Though, one should hold the right arm with the left hand while shaking hands or giving/receiving money. When shaking hands with the right hand, it is customary to touch your heart/chest immediately after ending the hand clasp.
  • When entering Malaysian homes, shoes must be left outside. Wearing shoes into the house is extremely rude.
  • Touching anyone's head. Malaysians, like Thais, also regard the head as the most important part of the human body. If you touch anyone's head, you will need to apologise right away.
  • Crossing your legs. It is considered rude if you cross your legs in the presence of older people.
  • Pointing with your forefinger is considered impolite. Instead, a closed fist held sideways (thumb at the top) with the thumb pointing the direction is used.

Australia, New Zealand

  • Requesting items like a fanny pack in Australian can be considered obscene due to the Australian usage of "fanny" as referring to a woman's vulva. [37] Bumbag is an acceptable local variation.
  • When riding alone in a taxi, it is considered polite to sit in the front seat with the driver. [38]
  • Confusing Australians with New Zealanders. The mistake will generally be taken in good humor, providing an apology is given; it would, however, be considered ignorant and boorish to dismiss the difference.
  • In the Māori community of New Zealand, it is a faux pas not to remove one's shoes when entering a Māori sacred building, such as a marae. In the dominant European community not removing shoes when entering a building is not a faux pas, therefore Europeans can sometimes forget to observe this tradition. This can offend Māori and sometimes cause tension.
  • Sitting on or resting one's backside against a table or desk can also offend Māori. The desk-top is where one focuses one's mind, so should not be touched by the 'dirty' nether regions.
  • You should shake hands when leaving the company of a person you have just met or someone you have not seen for a long time.
  • Queueing is expected when there is any demand for an item. The only exception to this is a pub or bar, where finding a space at the bar displays your intention. However it is still considered rude to allow a barperson to serve you before someone who has been waiting longer than you

Europe

  • Asking a woman what age she is is impolite in European tradition. [citation needed]

Balkans

Serbia

  • Giving somebody an even number of flowers. Even numbers of flowers are used at funerals.
  • When saying 'cheers' and clinking your glass with someone, always look at the person in the eyes.
  • Pointing at something and especially someone with you index finger is common and regarded as ordinary behavior.
  • Serving yourself an alcoholic drink. One must ask other people if they want some, serving them, and serving himself afterward.

Greece

  • Signifying "five" or even "stop" by holding up five fingers, with the palm of the hand facing the listener, especially when the palm is vertical, can be mistaken for an offensive gesture (similar to the finger). When signifying "five" the norm is to have the palm of the hand facing the speaker. Similarly for "Stop" closed fingers should be used. [39]
  • The expression "Hello" is conveyed with a raise index finger and a closed palm. The American style hand waving is considered obscene. [40]

Bulgaria

  • Giving somebody an even number of flowers. Even numbers of flowers are used at funerals. This does not apply to bouquets larger than a dozen items. [citation needed]
  • When saying 'cheers' and clinking your glass with someone, always look at the person in the eyes.
  • When you give money to somebody, do not put them in his\her hands. If possible, you better put the money on a table or similar place close to the person.

Central Europe

Romania

  • For men shaking hands while wearing gloves is considered impolite. This does not apply to women.
  • For men to sit while women are standing.
  • Giving somebody an even number of flowers. Even numbers of flowers are used at funerals. This does not apply to bouquets larger than a dozen items. [citation needed]
  • Pointing at something and especially someone with you index finger is considered an extreme lack of good manners.
  • Placing a phonecall to somebody after 22:00.
  • Sitting down to eat without removing outer garments.
  • It is impolite to begin eating before others have been served.
  • Serving yourself an alcoholic drink. One must ask other people if they want some, serving them, and serving himself afterward.
  • Do not confuse the Romanian language roots and associations with any of their neighbours.

Hungary

  • Simple generalizations about Eastern Europe can be considered incorrect; confusing Hungarians with Russians is particularly offensive because of Hungary's occupation by the USSR. Similarly, not knowing that Hungarians are not of Slavic origin, unlike most of the neighboring nations, and that the Hungarian language has different linguistic roots from the Czech, Slovak, Russian, Serbian etc. languages can be considered as rude.
  • In Hungary, people traditionally consider clinking their glasses/mugs when drinking beer as impolite. Clinking with any other alcoholic beverage, such as wine, champagne or hard liquor is customary, however. (This custom - or rather keeping from a custom - is receding nowadays.)
  • When Transylvania (a region in Romania with a significant Hungarian minority) comes up in a conversation, don't react by mentioning Dracula or the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Transylvania has a particular significance in Hungarian history, and Hungarians may get offended when people recognise this region only because of a popular horror story.
  • When giving flowers to a lady (girl, etc.), the number of them should be odd. Unless you are in love with the lady and want to compete for her, the flowers should not be red roses. White and yellow roses are OK in Hungary, they do not have negative meaning, like in several other countries.
  • Referring to the freedom fighters or revolutionaries of 1848 and 1956 as rebels.

Eastern Europe

  • It is considered boorish and impolite to use a knife when eating fish. Fish should be broken up with a fork, two forks or a special knife. [41]

Russia, Poland and Armenia

  • Flashing the American "O-K" gesture is considered inappropriate because in Russia that gesture refers to the anus. [42]
  • In Poland, it is considered rude to use someone's first name before they introduce themselves to you or use their name first [43]
  • In Russia, Poland, Serbia, and Armenia: sitting at a corner of a table is considered bad luck for an unmarried girl, as she will not find a husband. [citation needed]
  • In Armenia, while meeting or greeting someone, it is proper for you shake hands, then kiss both cheeks. [citation needed]
  • In Russia & Poland: entering someone's home for an event/dinner without a token gift is impolite. [citation needed] This rule is rescinded among good friends, and no longer in place among younger generation of Poles.
  • In Russia & Poland: greeting guests and conducting transactions (i.e. paying the pizza delivery man) over the doorstep. This is considered unlucky: wait for the person to step inside or step outside yourself.[citation needed]
  • In Poland: dressing casually for Easter, Christmas or other family celebrations is very rude (only in little towns where christan traditions remain strong, no longer important in bigger towns and cities).[citation needed]
  • In Poland: eating or offering horse meat, is a faux pas since to many Poles eating a horse is like eating a friend; a result of the 1000 year tradition of the Polish cavalry and the impact of well known and admired paintings by Wojciech Kossak.
  • In Poland pointing at something and especially someone with you index finger is considered an extreme lack of good manners. [citation needed]
  • Asking an unfamiliar woman for her age is considered rude or cheeky. [citation needed]
  • In Poland, when offering a cigarette, open the box and allow the receiver to take one out. Do not take the cigarette out and give by hand. It is also customary to light cigarettes, especially for women.

Kazakhstan

  • In Kazakhstan, it is considered an insult for a man to not offer a guest the opportunity to sleep with his sister. It is also considered impolite to turn down such an offer.

Northern Europe

Finland

  • Talking too much. Finns are not uncomfortable with silent pauses in conversations; thus, cultural misunderstandings may happen when, for example, an American is trying to be friendly by constantly making small talk and a Finn is trying to be friendly by being silent and listening to what he is saying. They both may make an unfriendly impression on each other.
  • The things listed under Norway, Sweden, Denmark also apply to Finland.

Norway, Sweden, Denmark

  • Placing a phonecall to somebody after 22:00.
  • Sitting down to eat without removing outer garments, such as a winter jacket.
  • In some Scandanvian countries, not finishing your food implies that the food was terrible and could not be eaten. In Norway and Sweden a person does not have to finish all of their food if someone else served, but it would be rude if they don't finish what they served themselves. [citation needed]
  • Smoking indoors is illegal in public places according to Norwegian and Swedish law and smoking indoors in private places without asking permission is considered rude. Offer the host to smoke outside and he/she may grant you permission to smoke indoors. Even if the host smokes or has ashtrays indoors, you should still ask if it is okay if you smoke (as long as he/she doesn't offer you a cigarette).
  • In Norway and Sweden it is considered very impolite not to remove ones shoes when entering someone's house and going further in than the foyer. This room is intended for exactly shoes, coats and the like.

Iceland

  • Lighting a cigarette from a candle is by some people regarded rude, many Icelanders are fishermen and it is believed that this act "kills a fisherman". The origin comes from the custom of lighting a candle in your window when someone in your house is returning from sea, this was believed to help them find their way. Lighting something from the candle might kill the flame and subsequently the fisherman as he won't find his way home.
  • In Iceland it is considered very rude to leave a dinner table without thanking the host for the meal. In Icelandic, the phrase used is, Takk fyrir mig. The host then normally responds with Verði þér að góðu.
  • Most of the items mentioned for Norway, Sweden, Denmark and Finland also apply to Iceland.
  • While at a dinner party it is considered rude to leave the table while others are still eating.
  • To tip someone for their service, for example a valet or waiter, is considered very rude.

Western Europe

Austria

  • In Austria it is impolite to begin eating before others have been served. [44]
  • Referring to Austrians as Germans.
  • Opening a door that someone has closed for privacy without knocking or otherwise seeking permission is considered rude and an invasion of privacy. [45]
  • Austrians tend to be more reserved than e.g. Americans. They value their privacy more and use phrases like "thank you" etc. more sparingly. They do not hug guests by default. To the unaccustomed ear the German language Austrians use perhaps sounds "harsh" (this also applies to Nordic languages). This does not mean, however, that they are in fact less friendly.
  • As is the case in many languages featuring a T-V distinction, addressing someone with the familiar second person pronoun (du) when they should be addressed with the formal form (Sie). [46]
  • Placing a phone call to somebody after 10 p.m. (22:00) , unless by previous appointment or calling a friend. Furthermore, do not call between 7.30 p.m. and 8.00 p.m (19:30 - 20:00), as most Austrians watch the prime time daily news at that time.[citation needed]
  • The tapping of one's index finger on the side of the head or the waving of one's hand up and down in front of their face (palm of the hand towards the face) are both considered offensive gestures. Both of these gestures, along with the phrase, Sie haben einen Vogel (lit.: You have a bird), insinuate that the other person is crazy or deranged. In some cases, i.e. regarding police officers or judges, the offense may be fined. The severity of this offense has lessened to some extent in the last decades.
  • Displaying a swastika and other Nazi symbols as well as certain Nazi-gestures is illegal in Austria and considered a criminal offence for which you can be sentenced to prison. It can be considered rude to mention or refer to Nazi Germany during normal conversation, unless the topic was started/offered by a Austrian. Even for Austrians, this topic is often considered thin ice. Although most Austrians do not feel responsible for what happened several generations ago, they feel that it is important to show a sensitive and mature approach to their past. So, before taking part in discussions about fascism and the Third Reich in Germany and Austria, make sure that your knowledge of the historic past is sufficient.
  • Asking an unfamiliar woman for her age (especially if she appears older than yourself).
  • Letting women open a door for a man. Male persons should always offer to open a door for women. This applies to many other aspects of life as well.

Belgium

  • Belgians are very reserved when it comes to money. They will not say how much money they make or have on their bank accounts. When you give someone a gift, make sure that it does not include a price tag. Giving cash is accepted however.
  • The northern part of Belgium is the Flanders, where Dutch is spoken. French is used in the south of Belgium, the Walloon region. There is also a relatively small German-speaking community in the east of Belgium. Both Dutch and French are spoken in Brussels. Considering Belgium to be a country where only Dutch or French is spoken is considered to be very offensive. It is considered extremely offensive to speak French to a Flemish local or Dutch to a Walloon local.
  • The Flemish political party Vlaams Belang, which is the former Vlaams Blok, one of the largest parties in Flanders, is excluded from any coalition government: the cordon sanitaire. This cordon sanitaire is a very sensitive political issue. Questioning it will often have you frowned upon.
  • Voting preferences are not made public in Belgium, especially not if the party is Vlaams Belang. This explains the discrepancy between exit polls and actual election results.

France

  • Like in many languages featuring a T-V distinction, addressing people with the familiar "tu" (like in Middle English thou) when they should be addressed with "vous" (you) is seen as derogatory, insulting, or even aggressive. Conversely, addressing familiars with "vous" is considered snobbish and introduces distance. [47][48]
  • Assuming that people speak English without inquiry may be found unpleasant; being able to greet in French and ask whether the interlocutor speaks English is highly appreciated. [49]
  • Offering chrysanthemums is in bad taste, since they are traditionally reserved for mourners.[50]
  • Offering red roses to a hostess or for professional reasons is inappropriate, as they express love.[51]
  • Not finishing one's meal. It implies that the food is so poor one cannot finish it, or the host does not balance correctly the quantity of food one needs.[52]
  • Serving yourself of wine. One must ask other people if they want some more wine, serving them, and serving himself afterward.[53]
  • Putting a piece of bread on one's plate. Leave it on the table beside the plate. (Bread is not considered a part of the meal, but rather more like salt and pepper. This is why they do not charge for bread at the restaurant.)[54]
  • Biting into the piece of bread directly (unless you have something on it -butter, pâté,...). One should break a small piece off, and put it into one's mouth. (Same reason as above). [55]
  • It is inappropriate to rest one's hands under the table or to have the elbows on the table.[56]
  • Crossing the fork and knife on the plate when the dish is finished; they should be more or less parallel or else it expressess that one hasn't eaten enough. [57]
  • Bringing a bottle of wine to a formal dinner in somebody's home suggests that the hosts are unable to provide their own wine. One may do so if you explain your hosts that you want them to discover a good wine that one like and that they do not know . (One should not bring a "good" bottle if one is not sure if it is good - it is not a question of price of the wine, it is a question of taste.)[58]
  • Putting a loaf of bread upside down. It is a bad omen because it is said that the loaf that was put upside down by the baker was reserved for the executioner. [59]
  • Holding one's umbrella open indoors may be seen as an omen of bad luck.[60]
  • For a man, not taking off one's hat (or cap) when saluting. This was a practice of the Victorian age as it is now less practiced. [61]
  • For a man, giving a handshake while wearing a glove. Coming out of use and was also present in the early 19th century England. [62]
  • For both sexes, shaking hands with a woman in a casual context introduces distance. Embracing (holding each other loosely in the arms while lightly kissing each other's cheek) is usually expected. The number of cheek-kisses varies from region to region between 2, 3 or 4.[63]
  • Giving the American "O-K" gesture, which in France means "zero" or "worthless". [64]

Germany

A rather comprehensive introduction on what is considered good manners in Germany can be found in the "Knigge". The original Knigge is a book on manners by Adolf Freiherr Knigge written in the 18th century. Nowadays, there are a bunch of books with a similar title, adapted to newer times. Much of what is described in the Knigge doesn't necessarily apply to everyone, especially when dealing with younger people, the rules are far more relaxed.

  • Opening a door that someone has closed for privacy without knocking or otherwise seeking permission is considered rude and an invasion of privacy. [65]
  • In German business dealings, scooting your chair closer to the host is considered an insult. [66]
  • Flashing the American "OK" gesture is considered inappropriate because in Germany that gesture refers to the anus. [67]
  • Germans tend to be more reserved than e.g. Americans. They value their privacy more and use phrases like "thank you" etc. more sparingly. They do not hug guests by default or ask everybody "How do you do?". To the unaccustomed ear the German language perhaps sounds "harsh" (this also applies to Nordic languages). This does not mean, however, that they are in fact less friendly.
  • As is the case in many languages featuring a T-V distinction, addressing someone with the familiar second person pronoun (du) when they should be addressed with the formal form (Sie). [68]
  • Placing a phone call to somebody after 10 p.m. (22:00) , unless by previous appointment or calling a friend. Furthermore, do not call senior citizens between 8 p.m. and 8.15 p.m (20:00 - 20:15), as many of them watch the prime time daily news at that time.
  • The tapping of one's index finger on the side of their head, or the waving of one's hand up and down in front of their face (palm of the hand towards the face) are both considered offensive gestures. Both of these gestures, along with the phrase, Sie haben einen Vogel (lit.: You have a bird), insinuate that the other person is crazy or deranged. The same applies to pointing one's index finger to one's temple, and imitating a screwing motion. The corresponding expression in german is eine Schraube locker haben (lit.: to have a loose screw). In some cases, especially regarding police officers or judges, the offense may be fined. The severity of this offense has lessened to some extent in the last decades.
  • Displaying a swastika and other Nazi symbols as well as certain Nazi-gestures is illegal in Germany and considered extremely rude and will be fined. It can be considered rude to mention or refer to Nazi Germany during normal conversation, unless the topic was started/offered by a German. Even for Germans, this topic is often considered thin ice. Although most Germans do not feel responsible for what happened several generations ago, they feel that it is important to show a sensitive and mature approach to their past. So, before taking part in discussions about fascism and the Third Reich in Germany, make sure that your knowledge of the historic past is sufficient.
  • When eating, starting to eat before the hostess or eldest lady on table is considered rude. This also counts for taking the last bit of a dish without asking if any other person would like to have some, or taking a second portion while other people have not finished their first yet.
  • Offering yellow roses to a married woman, since yellow roses are considered as a symbol for adultery by some people.[citation needed]
  • Asking an unfamiliar woman for her age (especially if she appears older than yourself).
  • In Germany, as well as in Austria, it is impolite to begin eating before others have been served. Also it is impolite to begin eating without wishing everybody Guten Appetit (lit.: good appetite) first.
  • During a meal, crossing your cutlery on the plate means that you are taking a break, but have not finished eating. If you are finished, place you knife and fork parallelly on the plate.
  • If you served yourself, or had the opportunity to tell the serving person to stop serving you (so, almost always except in a restaurant), it is considered rude to not finish your plate. Kids are told that not finishing your plate causes bad weather the next day.
  • Especially in the north of Germany, using a candle to light a cigarette is said to kill fishermen. The reason for this is probably that for each pack of a certain brand of matches bought, the producer used to give a Pfennig to an organization dedicated to sea rescue.
  • Putting your glass down on the table after clinking glasses (and before drinking) is considered rude in some parts of Germany. It is said to "invalidate" the Prost (cheers).
  • When clinking glasses you are supposed to look into the person's eyes who you are toasting.
  • Not closing your umbrella before stepping inside any building, even if there is more than enough room for it open. (It is considered bad luck to open an umbrella indoors)

Ireland

  • Referring to Britain and Ireland as the British Isles, or to Britain as the "Mainland". Most Irish people will consider this offensive.
  • Referring to the Republic of Ireland as Éire: although this is the official title of the state in the Irish language, it is considered an irksome and patronizing term used only by the English, though usually well-intentioned. Simply refer to the country as "Ireland" or "the Republic of Ireland".
  • Referring to the Republic of Ireland as a part of the United Kingdom rather than the independent nation that it is.
  • The Republic of Ireland shares many faux pas in common with the United Kingdom, many of which are listed below under the title United Kingdom.
  • Treating Ireland as a subcategory or special case of the United Kingdom, rather than as a separate country, as is done in the previous line, is considered offensive by many Irish people.
  • Referring to Derry city or county Derry as Londonderry among the nationalist community, including the Republic of Ireland; OR referring to Londonderry as Derry among the unionist community.
  • When out for drinks with work colleagues or friends, it is considered rude not to pay for one "round" of drinks (i.e. each individual present pays for a set of drinks for all present). This does not apply if it is understood that you are only going to be having one or two drinks (in that case each individual pays for their own, or pays for themselves and one other person, who will return the favour in the following round). It may still apply if you are not drinking alcohol but still staying for more than two or three drinks.
  • It is illegal to smoke indoors in any workplace in Ireland including all bars, restaurants and offices. This is almost universally observed. Smoking indoors generally, especially in the presence of others or in another person's home, has become increasingly frowned on. It is normal to step outside to smoke.

Italy

  • It's forbidden to enter a church if you don't have your upper arms and (male) legs covered by clothes; for women a skirt within a couple of inches of the knee is acceptable. You will be shown outside if you wear very short sleeves or short pants in church. Locals often complain about tourists breaking this rule.
  • Like in many languages, there are two distinct way of addressing people; one familiar used with friends and relatives ("tu"), and one formal used with strangers and (usually) co-workers ("lei"). Thus, it's considered impolite (or even aggressive) to address people with the familiar one when the formal one is seen as appropriate.
  • Biting into the piece of bread directly (butter, pâté, etc should be placed on a small piece broken off, and then put whole into one's mouth).
  • Bread must be broken with hands and not with a knife or other cutlery. This is because hungry peasants crammed their mouths with food; the better bred were less hungry, and displaying teeth tearing off chunks of bread is not attractive to behold.
  • Crossing the fork and knife on the plate when the dish is finished; they should be more or less parallel (at the "four o'clock position").
  • After entering, leaving one's coat without being invited to do so. One must ask first.
  • Putting one's hat on a bed is considered ominous by some.
  • Entering into a shop without greeting the proprietor. A friendly "Buona Sera" or some other polite greeting is expected, even if just browsing.
  • Showing envy or paying compliments to children or the elderly, without spitting afterwards. Alternatively, if spitting is impractical, one can add a negative comment instead such as "Ahh, such an intelligent boy... but so ugly!"

Netherlands

  • Addressing the country as Holland is considered incorrect in most parts of the Netherlands, since Holland only covers two of the provinces of the country. [69]
  • Addressing a stranger, especially older person with the familiar second person pronoun instead of the formal form. Business people in general always use the formal form.
  • Not closing your umbrella before stepping inside any building, even if there is more than enough room for it open. (It is considered bad luck to open an umbrella indoors)
  • Being asked to come and visit in the afternoon does - unlike in other countries like Russia - NOT include an invitation to dinner. Thus, staying longer in the expectation to be served dinner is considered very rude.

Spain

  • At Spanish restaurants it is considered rude for the staff to bring a customer the check without the customer first requesting it. [70]

United Kingdom

  • Signifying "two" of something by holding up two fingers separated, with the back of the hand pointed towards the listener, can be mistaken for an offensive gesture (similar to the finger). Holding up two fingers with the hand held the other way (palm of the hand towards the listener) is perfectly acceptable (as it forms the "Peace" sign and the "V for victory" sign used during World War II). See also The V sign as an insult. [71]
  • Calling the united - but culturally and socially independent - countries (Scotland, England, Wales and Northern Ireland) "England". This may be regarded as highly offensive to everybody including the English. Sensitivity is appreciated regarding national identity (some prefer to be "English", some "British", some "Scottish", etc.).
  • It is considered proper to hold doors open for others before you pass the threshold yourself, particularly for women, the elderly or those carrying heavy or bulky goods that could prevent them opening the door themselves. However help should be offered before any physical contact, even that of helping an Old Age Pensioner with their bags, can occur. If you are on the receiving end, a "thank you" is expected, even in hotels where people are paid to do this for you.
  • Asking an unfamiliar woman for her age (especially if she appears older than yourself).
  • Queueing is expected when there is any demand for an item. The only exception to this is a pub or bar, where finding a space at the bar displays your intention. However it is still considered rude to allow a barperson to serve you before someone who has been waiting longer than you.
  • Many English words have different, sometimes contradictory or offensive (such as fanny, which is equivalent to the American "pussy" or "snatch") meanings in Britain and the USA or Canada. A basic knowledge of British word usage is looked kindly upon from visitors from other Anglophone nations, although those who do not speak English as a first language will be given far more clemency.
  • In the United States it is common to vocally thank the host after a meal, often stopping to propose a toast. In Britain a small gift for the host given upon entering such as flowers for the table or wine or chocolates for the meal combined with more subdued thanks is more common. [72]
  • Complaining if the person who called an important meeting is late can be seen as impolite in some more traditional businesses; if they are important enough to call the meeting they are important enough to wait for.
  • Not offering tea or coffee to a guest.
  • Kissing (or hugging) people you don't know or people with whom you have been briefly acquainted (this could even include relatives of your spouse - the inlaws).
  • Talking (or asking) about one's personal wealth, possessions or success in business is seen as vulgar. It is generally frowned upon to ask one's work colleagues about their salary, and in some places of work it is forbidden.
  • Eating chips/French fries with your fingers in a restaurant is not done. Use your fork instead. You can use your fingers to eat meat if it's on the bone, such as chicken legs. Use of the fingers is acceptable when the food is served buffet style.
  • Requesting that uneaten restaurant food be placed in a container and taken home is usually seen as vulgar.
  • Pointing directly towards someone whilst talking about them, or just pointing at people in general.
  • Touching someone to get their attention unless it's an emergency or touching someone without saying "excuse me" or "sorry".
  • Not shaking hands when meeting someone for the first time.
  • It is considered polite to offer up a seat on public transport to elderly people (and older women in general), pregnant women, or the infirm. In fact many public transport authorities now request this by placing signs in the vehicles, and a space MUST be given up to elderly people or wheelchair users in these instances. It is also considered polite to offer a seat in a busy bar or other informal setting (shopping centre, waiting room) to others.
  • In a pub or bar it is traditional to buy drinks in rounds (i.e. one person will buy for a number of others) trying to stay out of this group or offer money to the buyer can be seen as rude. Not buying a round is very rude. It is generally accepted that not everyone will stay long enough to buy a round, instead of trying to avoid being in the round it is better to accept the drink with thanks. This is done on the understanding that at a later date this might be reciprocated.
  • Whereas "asking nicely" is often sufficient for politeness in the USA, tone of voice is not adequate for polite requests in the UK: you must follow requests with "please".
  • Summoning shop workers or servers with gestures, or particularly with snapping of fingers, is considered rude.
  • It is considered rude not to bag your own groceries at the check-out. This is a faux pas commonly committed by Americans, because bags are commonly packed for them by store employees in the United States. In some shops, particularly supermarkets, help with packing may be offered by the cashier before they begin checking out your items.
  • Specific to Scotland (some of these may also apply to other parts of the UK)

Latin America

  • In Latin American culture, it is considered impolite to "toss" objects to people instead of directly handing it to them. [73]
  • The American "come here" gesture of palm upwards with the fingers curled back is considered a romantic solicitation. [74]
  • Latin American cultures have a smaller sense of personal space than other cultures and it is considered rude to step away when someone is stepping closer. [75]

Argentina

Brazil

  • Flashing the American "O-K" gesture is considered inappropriate because in Brazil that gesture refers to a private body part. [77]
  • Gift giving among the opposite sex can be misinterpreted as having romantic overtures. [78]
  • When offering something, especially food, offer at least three times, and enforce the offer a bit more each time. It is considered rude if you offer something only once.

Chile

  • In Chile, wine is expected to be poured with the right hand. [79]
  • Smoking is banned on public transportation and in cinemas. [80]

Ecuador

  • It is polite for someone to ask permission before taking a photograph. A tip may be requested in exchange for that permission. [81]
  • Beachwear should only be worn at the beach and not in town. [82]

Mexico

  • Criticism of nepotism in business dealings. [83]
  • The color purple is associated with funeral and should be avoided when giving flowers. [84]
  • The courtesy titles "Señora" and "Señorita" (Mrs. and Miss, respectively) are taken colloquially as "Married Woman" and "Virgin Woman", as a woman is not supposed to have lost virginity unless married. Even older women should be addressed as "Señorita" if their marital status is unknown, especially in rural areas.
  • When an invitation is issued the invitee assumes everything will be paid for, unless clarified. Even if he/she offers to pay their part.
  • It's considered rude to talk about sex or bodily functions openly, even though double entendres are a common form of humor and joking.
  • Several kinds of food are eaten with the fingers (tacos, tortas) and it's considered snobbish to eat them with fork and knife. In case of doubt wait to see how the rest of the table eats their own.
  • Toasting with water is considered bad luck and, in a lesser degree, toasting with any non-alcoholic drink.
  • Women expect doors to be opened for them as a sign of chivalry by the closest male to them. This also applies to lighting of cigarettes and helping them to their seat.
  • Unless the service is really bad, tips should never be below 10% of the bill total, as they're commonly the waiter's main means of income. 15% is recommended in highly-frequented places.

Nicaragua

  • Refusing a drink on a hot day or not praising the host for the quality of the meal is considered rude. [85]
  • Knocking softly on someone's front door. One should knock loudly on the door so that one can easily be heard.
  • Referring to the United States as 'America'. To Nicaraguans, they too are 'Americans'. The USA should be referred to as 'Los Estados Unidos', and in adjective form as 'estadounidense'.
  • Not heeding the advice of Nicaraguans urging you not to shower when you are hot, or agitado would be considered poor form.

North America

Canada

  • Calling a Canadian "American" is perceived as a faux-pas when accidental, but can also be used as an insult to highlight someone's negative behaviour if it is considered to belong to one of the negative American stereotypes. (e.g. "You're so American")
  • Confusing Canadians with Americans. The mistake will generally be taken in good humor, providing an apology is given; it would, however, be considered ignorant and boorish to dismiss the difference.
  • Not waiting at the end of a queue for your turn ("cutting in line") is considered extremely rude.
  • It is considered polite to inquire if you are allowed to smoke before lighting a cigarette, except outdoors. This is particularly true when visiting others. Due to changing laws and social values, smoking inside most public buildings, such as work places and stores, is not allowed. Most areas of Canada now prohibit smoking in restaurants as well.
  • Spitting on the ground or blowing one's nose into anything but a tissue or handkerchief is considered gross and rude. This is at odds with other regions of the world where this is acceptable.
  • Canadians are extremely polite when it comes to mild physical faux pas such as stepping on feet or bumping into others. Often both parties will briefly apologise, including the person who was bumped.
  • In Quebec only, for both sexes, shaking hands with a woman in a casual context introduces distance. Embracing (holding each other loosely in the arms while lightly kissing each other's cheeks, once for each side) is usually expected.
  • Not leaving an appropriate tip or gratuity at a restaurant (typically 15% of the bill for standard service and higher for better service) will make any dinner guests at your table feel extremely uncomfortable. In Canada, tips represent a large portion of a waiter's income and your guests may feel embarrassed to return to the restaurant if the tip was considered too small.

United States

  • Not looking someone directly in the eye when speaking can be seen as evasive; this is in contrast to much of the rest of the world, where looking someone directly in the eye may be rude.[citation needed]
  • Not leaving an appropriate tip or gratuity at a restaurant (typically 15-20% of the bill) will make any dinner guests at your table feel extremely uncomfortable. In the U.S., tips represent a large portion of a waiter's income and your guests may feel embarrassed to return to the restaurant if the tip was considered too small.
  • It is considered impolite to ask someone what religion they believe in. [citation needed]
  • It is considered impolite to ask someone how much money they earn. It is not considered rude to ask what they do for a living.
  • It is considered impolite to not cover your mouth and nose when sneezing or coughing. When someone else sneezes, it is customary to say "Bless you." (The German word for health, "Gesundheit", is also generally acceptable.) If someone says "Bless you" to you, it is customary to reply with "Thank you."
  • At an initial introduction, it is considered awkward to ask someone if they are married or have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
  • At an initial introduction, it is considered awkward to ask someone their political views.
  • It is considered impolite to ask a woman how old she is or inquire about her weight.
  • Strangers in America interact with one another generally in a friendly, not formal way. Many foreigners who travel to America thus unjustly find Americans superficial. Although Americans treat one another in a very friendly way, they nevertheless understand and maintain the limits of their relationships and the distinction between acquaintances and friends. Conversely, foreigners who cannot interact with Americans in a relaxed, casual manner, may be perceived as awkward, aloof, rude, or even arrogant.
  • It is considered a rude violation of personal space to stand too close to somebody, unless you are very familiar with that individual or crowded conditions require you to do so.
  • Getting the attention of servers or store workers with gestures or by snapping fingers, is considered offensive. It is better to say something along the lines of "Pardon me . . ."
  • In most business settings, physical contact should be limited to a handshake at the beginning and end of the meeting.
  • When giving a handshake, the corner of your hand between the thumb and first finger should be met firmly with the other person to avoid an uncomfortable weak handshake.
  • It is considered impolite to give cash as a gift, except to close family members.
  • When an American is driving, it is considered rude for the passenger to do anything to the car radio.

References

  1. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  2. ^ ibid
  3. ^ ibid
  4. ^ ibid
  5. ^ ibid
  6. ^ USDOJ The First Three to Five Seconds: Understanding Arab and Muslim Americans Part II
  7. ^ Erin Richards Cultural Etiquette September 19th, 2006
  8. ^ Cultural Tips
  9. ^ Teaching for Inclusion
  10. ^ Cultural Tips
  11. ^ ibid
  12. ^ ibid
  13. ^ Susan Kurth Clot deBroissia International Gift Giving Protocol
  14. ^ Wong Yee Lee Gifts in Chinese Culture
  15. ^ ibid
  16. ^ Top Ten Guidelines to Gift-Giving in China
  17. ^ J. Sydney Jones Taiwanese Americians
  18. ^ Chinese New Year
  19. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  20. ^ Top Ten Guidelines to Gift-Giving in China
  21. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  22. ^ Dan Waters Chinese Funerals
  23. ^ Scott Reeves Forbes Magazine July 28th, 2005
  24. ^ Terri Morrison The Business of Gifts
  25. ^ Fodor's Tokyo Etiquette & Behavior
  26. ^ ibid
  27. ^ ibid
  28. ^ ibid
  29. ^ ibid
  30. ^ ibid
  31. ^ ibid
  32. ^ ibid
  33. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  34. ^ ibid
  35. ^ Jane Arnold Travel Thailand: A Farang Fashion Faux Pas
  36. ^ ACIS Travel Talk August 2006
  37. ^ Rebecca Falkoff Unintentional Transgressions of the Work Abroad Community Monster.com
  38. ^ Cultural Tips
  39. ^ ACIS Travel Talk August 2006
  40. ^ Cultural Tips
  41. ^ ACIS Travel Talk August 2006
  42. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  43. ^ Cultural Tips
  44. ^ Cultural Tips
  45. ^ Terri Morrison Blunders and Faux Pas
  46. ^ Rebecca Falkoff Unintentional Transgressions of the Work Abroad Community Monster.com
  47. ^ Michel Walter Pharand. (2001) Bernard Shaw and the French, University Press of Florida. p. 113. ISBN 0813018285.
  48. ^ Hervey Sandor, Ian Higgins, Sandor G J Hervey. (2002) Thinking French Translation, Routledge (UK). p. 46. ISBN 0415255228.
  49. ^ Sally Adamson Taylor. (2004) Culture Shock! France (Culture Shock! France), Marshall Cavendish International (Asia) Pte. Ltd. ISBN 155868767X.
  50. ^ Understanding France
  51. ^ Window on the World
  52. ^ ibid
  53. ^ ibid
  54. ^ ibid
  55. ^ ibid
  56. ^ ibid
  57. ^ ibid
  58. ^ Giving Gifts
  59. ^ Food and Culture
  60. ^ Almanac
  61. ^ Victorian Age Etiquette
  62. ^ Bartelby's
  63. ^ Ming TV
  64. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  65. ^ Terri Morrison Blunders and Faux Pas
  66. ^ ibid
  67. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  68. ^ Rebecca Falkoff Unintentional Transgressions of the Work Abroad Community Monster.com
  69. ^ Cultural Tips
  70. ^ ACIS Travel Talk August 2006
  71. ^ ACIS Travel Talk August 2006
  72. ^ Cultural Tips
  73. ^ U.S. Institute of Languages Spanish Culture and nonverbal communication
  74. ^ ibid.
  75. ^ Erin Richards Cultural Etiquette September 19th, 2006
  76. ^ Expat Argentina Social Faux-Pas in Argentina
  77. ^ Airman's Quarterly Spring 2006
  78. ^ Terri Morrison The Business of Gifts
  79. ^ Erin Richards Cultural Etiquette September 19th, 2006
  80. ^ South American Travel tips
  81. ^ South American Travel tips
  82. ^ ibid
  83. ^ Terri Morrison Blunders and Faux Pas
  84. ^ Cultural Tips
  85. ^ Cultural Tips