Cheek kissing
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Cheek kissing is a ritual or social gesture to indicate friendship, perform a greeting, to confer congratulations, to comfort someone, or to show respect. It does not necessarily indicate sexual or romantic interest.
Cheek kissing is very common in Southern Europe, the Mediterranean, the Middle East and Latin America. It is not as common in Canada and United States, Asia, or most areas of Northern/Western Europe. However, there are some exceptions in North America, including ethnic neighborhoods, such as Italian or Hispanic neighborhoods, as well as Miami and Quebec.
Soviet and other eastern European communist leaders often greeted each other in this fashion on public and state occasions. Nowadays in Eastern Europe male-female and female-female cheek kissing is a very common greeting between friends, especially younger than 35 years old. Male-male cheek kissing is rare and is usually practiced by people of Caucasian cultures.
Depending on the local culture, cheek kissing may be considered appropriate between a man and a woman, a parent and a child, two women, or two men. The latter is socially accepted in South Eastern Europe and in some countries of the South Western Europe and the Middle East, and in Europe generally it is becoming increasingly common especially among the young. It may however bring up associations with homosexuality in Asia, Latin America and the US. There is less fear of this in Europe where homosexuality is more widely accepted.[citation needed] In France kissing between male heterosexual friends is much more common but not between men who have just been introduced; a situation where two heterosexual women would probably kiss.
In a cheek kiss, both persons lean forward and either lightly touch cheek with cheek or lip with cheek. Generally the gesture is repeated with the other cheek, or more, alternating cheeks. Depending on country and situation the number of kisses is usually one, two, three or four. Hand-shaking or hugging may also take place.
Cheek-kissing is used in many cultures with slightly varying meaning and gesture. For example, cheek-kissing may or may not be associated with a hug. The appropriate social context for use can vary greatly from one country to the other, though the gesture might look similar.
North America
In the United States and Canada, the cheek kiss may involve one or both cheeks. According to March 15, 2004 edition of Time Magazine, "a single kiss is acceptable [greeting] in the United States, but it's mostly a big-city phenomenon." In most relationships, the girl usually kisses the boy on the cheek. (sign of love or affection)
Cheek kissing of children by adults of both sexes is perhaps the most common cheek kiss in North America. Typically it is a short, perfunctory greeting, and is most often done by relatives.
Cheek kissing between adults, when it occurs at all, is most often done between a man and woman who know each other well, such as between relatives or close friends. In this case, a short hug (generally only upper-body contact) may accompany the kiss. Also common is cheek kissing between two women who know each other or are related. Likewise, hugs are common but not required. A hug alone may also suffice in both of these situations, and is much more common.
However, occasionally cheek kissing is a romantic gesture, such as among a boy and girl.
A variation of the cheek kiss is the air kiss. This kiss is done without actually making contact with the skin, but with the lips fairly close to the cheek.
A kiss may also be blown from a distance of several feet. This is most often done as flirting, but it can also be done sarcastically.
Particularly in the Southeast, elderly women may be cheek-kissed by younger men as a gesture of affection and respect.
Immigrant groups tend to have their own norms for cheek kissing, usually carried over from their native country.
In Miami, Florida, an area heavily influenced by Latin American and European immigrants, kissing hello on the cheek is the social norm.
In parts of New England, cheek kissing, or touching, is becoming more and more popularly used among circles, mainly in areas of French or Roman Catholic influence.[citation needed]
In Quebec, cheek kissing is referred to, in a popular language, as "un bec" (donner un bec). People of the opposite sex usually kiss once on each cheek; it is also acceptable for a pair of women, though typically men will refrain. Two people introduced by a mutual friend may also donner un bec.
Latin America
In Latin America, cheek kissing is a universal form of greeting between a man and a woman or two women. It is not necessary to know a person well or be intimate with them to kiss them on the cheek. In fact, when some Latin American (Mexicans for instance) people are introduced to someone new, they usually greet them with a cheek kiss if the person being introduced to them is a member of the opposite sex. A cheek kiss can be accompanied by a handshake or a hug, although hugs are usually a sign of deeper trust.
As with other regions, cheek kissing may be lips-to-cheek or cheek-to-cheek with a kiss in the air, the latter being more common.
Cheek-kissing between two men is usually seen as a sign of homosexuality or femininity in most conservative countries, except father-son cases and very rarely, close friend kissing.
Other exceptions occur in Argentina and Uruguay where it is common between male friends to kiss "a la italiana", i.e. football players kiss each other to congratulate or to greet. This kind of greeting can be awkward to, say, a Colombian trying to shake hands with a new Argentine friend who is trying to kiss him. In Chile, kissing between male friends is less popular than in Argentina and Uruguay, but it's not unusual between good friends.
Southern Europe
Cheek kissing is a standard greeting throughout Southern Europe between friends or acquaintances, but less common in professional settings. In general, men and women would kiss and women will kiss women. Men kissing men varies depending on the country and even on the family, in some countries men will kiss men; in others only men of the same family would consider kissing. It may also depend on the part of a country and the occasion.
Greece is an example of a country where cheek kissing highly depends on the region and the type of event. For example, in most parts of Crete, it is common between a man and a woman who are friends, but is very uncommon between men unless they are close relatives. In Athens it may be commonplace between close friends of both sexes when meeting or departing. It is uncommon between strangers of any sex, and it may be considered offensive otherwise. It's standard for children and parents, children and grandparents et cetera. In its "formal" form it will be two kisses, one on each cheek. It may be a standard formal form of greeting in special events such as weddings.
Cheek kissing in Turkey is also widely accepted in greetings. Male to male cheek kissing is considered normal almost in every occasion, even for men who are introduced for the first time. (Natianolists hit each others head on the side instead of cheek kissing - possibly as an attempt to masculinize the action). Cheek kissing between women is also very common. A man and a woman could cheek kiss each other for greeting without sexual connotations only if they are good friends or depending on the circle, the setting, and the location. Such action at a bar in Istanbul, or the beach in Bodrum would not be out of place, yet being the guest at a traditional house, and trying to cheek kiss the girl with the headdress may not be taken well.
However, in Portugal and Spain, the situation is quite similar to the Mexican situation, where women always salute with two kisses and, usually, men only kiss women (even with strangers), the handshake being the most common salutation between them, although men kissing does occur relatively frequently, particularly when congratulating close friends or relatives. Cheek to cheek and the kiss in the air is also very popular. Hugging is common between men, women and, when the other is from the opposite sex, it may be given with a kiss added.
The Netherlands
In the Netherlands cheek kissing is a common greeting between relatives and friends (throughout the country, but slightly more so in the south). Generally speaking, women will kiss both women and men, while men will only kiss women i.e. men will not kiss each other (Rather shake hands instead) . As is usual in several western countries (including Switzerland), a cheek kiss consists of three consecutive kisses.
Middle East
Cheek kissing is relatively common, between friends, relatives, and lovers. Cheek kissing between males is common and does not have any homosexual connotation if performed after a long period of not having seen each other or when congratulating each other on holidays. However, cheek kissing between a male and female is usually considered inappropriate, unless within the same family; e.g. brother and sister. Some exceptions to this are Lebanon, Egypt, and some of the more liberal Arab countries, where cheek kissing is a common greeting between unrelated males and females in most communities, and the Lebanese custom has become the norm for non-Lebanese in Lebanese-dominated communities of the Arab diaspora.
South East Asia
Cheek kissing is extremely uncommon in South East Asia, especially in countries with predominantly Muslim or Hindu cultures. It is due to this reason that kissing between men and women is not a socially acceptable way of greeting and may be considered offensive. Also South East Asian men might be uncomfortable while greeting a European woman in this manner due to this cultural practice.
There are two major exceptions. In Macau, many of the residents are of Portuguese descent, and thus cheek kissing is popular in the same situations as in Portugal. In the Philippines, cheek kissing is a common greeting. This custom originated during the long Spanish rule, which explains why the Spanish word beso (kiss) is the Filipino term for this greeting.
In certain communities in Indonesia, notably the Manado or Minahasa people, kissing on the cheeks (twice) is normal among relatives, including males.
See also
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