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Talk:Yonatan Roshfeld

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Comments on the article

[edit]

@לילך5: thank you for creating this article. I have a few suggestions.

  • If he is known in Israel by a Hebrew name, add this to the lead sentence. Look at biographical articles of prominent people with Hebrew names for the conventional way of doing this.
  • Specify more years, including when he was on the TV shows and and when he opened his businesses
  • Several Google hits describe a TV show called The Next Restaurant of Israel. Is this the same show as Israel's next restaurant, and is there an 'official' translation? Either way, I would expect Israel's Next Restaurant to have capital letters.
  • Describe Captain Curry - is it a restaurant or a food shop?
  • Explain Gindi TLV. Does TLV mean Tel Aviv? Is Gindi a suburb? Remember that you are writing for an international audience.
  • Does the source say where we studied in New York or Cannes? Was the New York school a high school or a music college - we should certainly say if he studied at the Juilliard School. Did he specialise in a musical instrument?
  • Where this is no English Wikipedia article to link to, you can set up a conditional link to Hebrew Wikipedia (or any other language edition), see Template:Interlanguage link. This might help Hebrew-speaking readers.
  • The article reads as a list of facts, please try to write in a more flowing style. I have made a couple of changes to try to improve this.

Regards, Verbcatcher (talk) 17:35, 20 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I added the Hebrew name, and the seasons. המסעדה הבאה is written both as The Next Restaurant of Israel and as Israel's next restaurant, I don't know if there is something official, the show is in Hebrew, not in English.---Lilach5 (לילך5) discuss 19:43, 20 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]
I made some more changes, I will fix it some more with your comments later too.---Lilach5 (לילך5) discuss 19:46, 20 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]