A fact from Alicia Graf Mack appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 26 July 2020 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:30, 22 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
... that Alicia Graf Mack is the first woman of color and the youngest person to be the director of Juilliard School's Dance Division? Source: "Alicia Graf Mack's journey to become director of The Juilliard School's Dance Division—the youngest person to hold the position, and the first woman of color—was anything but a straight line." ([1])
ALT1:... that dancer Alicia Graf Mack finished a BA in Columbia University and an MA degree at Washington University in St. Louis during hiatuses in her career? Source: "But Mack also has a BA in history from Columbia University and an MA in nonprofit management from Washington University in St. Louis; she pursued both degrees during breaks in her performing career, taken to recover from injuries and autoimmune disease flare-ups." ([2])
Created by Corachow (talk). Self-nominated at 14:50, 4 July 2020 (UTC).[reply]
The full review will be to follow, but first I wonder if additional hooks could be proposed here. While her achievements are undoubtedly great accomplishments, general readers might not be familiar with the Juilliard School or its significance, so the hook may not work so well for broad audiences. The second hook is not really interesting either since it just mentions her studies without much additional context. I can see two possible angles here that could have wider appeal: one could be her overcoming Ankylosing spondylitis, and the other could be that she has danced among Beyoncé, John Legend, Andre 3000 and Alicia Keys. If desired, either of these suggestions could be combined with ALT0. There's also a minor typo in the article: "it was disband" should be "it was disbanded". Narutolovehinata5tccsdnew 03:56, 15 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Narutolovehinata5, I fixed the typo in the article. However, I think the broader audience would be familiar with Juilliard, one of the best performing arts conservatory, than Ankylosing spondylitis, and a link is included in case they don't, and many dancers had performed for Beyoncé, John Legend, Andre 3000 and Alicia Keys, so it's not very significant, but here's one more option:
ALT2: ... that dancer Alicia Graf Mack completed a history degree in Columbia University while recovering from ankylosing spondylitis? Source: "At the age of 19, Mack was sidelined by an injury and was diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis (AS) that same year. “Could you imagine doing something everyday of your life for 20 years and having it stripped from you without a logical explanation?,” she said of her injury and diagnosis. After her diagnosis, she stopped dancing completely, in order to let her body heal. During that time Mack enrolled in Columbia University and received her history degree. ([3])
Also there's an image on the article, uploaded by the choreographer of the piece, it's a bit blurry, so please check and see is it suitable. Corachow (talk) 12:25, 15 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
ALT2 sounds good. A dancer being a history major is a surprising fact when combined with her recovery. Yes the illness is obscure (I personally haven't even heard of it prior to this nomination) but it seemed to be eye-brow raising given how she went on to become a dancer in spite of it. Narutolovehinata5tccsdnew 12:35, 15 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I'll try to finish the review by tomorrow, I got caught up in some off-Wiki matters since my last comment. Narutolovehinata5tccsdnew 13:53, 18 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Meets DYK article requirements and no close paraphrasing was found. QPQ has been verified. ALT2 is verified in the source but is spread over multiple sentences that lack a footnote; the footnotes will need to be duplicated in the respective sentences for DYK purposes. There's a date of birth in the infobox but is not mentioned in the body and is uncited; either a citation should be given or it should be commented out. This will be approved once the issues have been addressed. Narutolovehinata5tccsdnew 06:54, 19 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Narutolovehinata5 The birth date is put by someone who was not logged in, I had switched it to birth based on age as of date. I copied the entire part about her diagnosis and degree to the source. Corachow (talk) 12:30, 19 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Fair enough, but the "age based on date" part still needs a footnote. Narutolovehinata5tccsdnew 06:01, 20 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done, the source is on the lead section. Corachow (talk) 11:36, 20 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The full review will be to follow, but first I wonder if additional hooks could be proposed here. While her achievements are undoubtedly great accomplishments, general readers might not be familiar with the Juilliard School or its significance, so the hook may not work so well for broad audiences. The second hook is not really interesting either since it just mentions her studies without much additional context. I can see two possible angles here that could have wider appeal: one could be her overcoming Ankylosing spondylitis, and the other could be that she has danced among Beyoncé, John Legend, Andre 3000 and Alicia Keys. If desired, either of these suggestions could be combined with ALT0. There's also a minor typo in the article: "it was disband" should be "it was disbanded". Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 03:56, 15 July 2020 (UTC)
Okay I think we're good to go now with ALT2. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 08:29, 21 July 2020 (UTC)