Foreplay

Not to be confused with Fourplay.

For the song by Boston, see Foreplay/Long Time.

"Heavy petting" redirects here. For the album by Bad Manners, see Heavy Petting.

Martin van Maele's print Francion 15 depicts a couple engaging in foreplay outdoors

In human sexual behavior, foreplay is a set of intimate psychological and physical acts between two or more people meant to create desire for sexual activity and sexual arousal. Either or any of the sexual partners may initiate the foreplay, and they may not be the active partner during the sexual activity.

Any act that creates and enhances sexual desire in a sexual partner may constitute foreplay, including kissing, touching, embracing, talking, and teasing (teasing, in this case, may include methods of satisfaction, such as erotic sexual denial). The manual or oral stimulation of erogenous zones may be considered foreplay, as well as being part of the sex act itself. Sexual role-playing, fetish activities, and BDSM can also be considered foreplay, though they may continue into the sexual activity and not just precede it.

History

There are many historical references to foreplay, with many artistic depictions. The Ancient Indian work Kama Sutra mentions different types of embracing, kissing, and marking with nails and teeth. It also mentions BDSM activities such as slapping and moaning as "play."

What constitutes foreplay

If no intimate sexual acts are intended, foreplay-type actions are often classified as flirting, "fooling around" or, in colloquial terms, being "touchy-feely". Since these interactions are non-explicit, there can be misunderstandings about whether an invitation has been extended or accepted. Inadvertent or not, this kind of miscommunication is often termed "leading someone on."

A romantic, intimate, or overtly sexual atmosphere can be considered a gesture of foreplay. Foreplay can begin with non-physical behavior that signals sexual availability. Verbally, foreplay may include compliments, subtle comments with double entendre, and intimate conversations. Non-verbally, foreplay can include provocative clothing, preening gestures, winking, licking or biting one's lips, standing inside a partner's personal space, and holding a gaze longer than is acceptable for casual acquaintances.

Progression

Foreplay eventually turns physical. Simple and possibly innocuous acts, such as straightening someone's clothing or hair, bumping into someone while walking, stroking someone's arm, or whispering in someone's ear can constitute foreplay. One may also hold hands, touch the face, kiss, "bite", tickle, or massage.

As comfort increases, so usually does the level of intimacy. More intimate examples include:

• Touching and massaging erogenous zones over clothing, also known colloquially as groping or "heavy petting";
• Rubbing together erogenous zones over clothing, also known as dry humping or grinding;
• Undressing oneself or partner, also known as stripping.

There are many types of foreplay. Stimulation with the hands is the most common form, followed by oral stimulation. Foreplay is to provide sexual pleasure and arousal. The act is generally the act of preparing one's partner for sexual intercourse, though it does not exclude the chance of orgasm if applied rigorously.

Direct manipulation of naked erogenous zones is almost always considered foreplay (except in a medical context). In women, this includes stimulation of the clitoris and vulva. In men, it includes stimulation of the penis and scrotum. For both sexes, it could include stimulation of nipples and anus. Stimulation can be achieved by mouth, hands, sex toys like dildos or vibrators, or common household objects like feathers or ice cubes. Direct manipulation of naked erogenous zones is not considered foreplay when it is not preparatory for further sexual acts. For example, mutual masturbation and oral sex are often considered final sexual acts; as final acts with no expectation of further sexual congress, these are not considered foreplay.

Foreplay tends to become increasingly physical and intense as the couple moves closer to intercourse. It reaches its peak in the moments just before intercourse, when it induces a strong mutual desire for penetration. During the final stage of foreplay, genital teasing may take place for a brief time. Technically, foreplay ends with intromission, or the beginning of intercourse. In practical terms, however, the continuity between foreplay and intercourse may be very great, since the couple may continue to engage in foreplay-like behavior during intercourse.

Safe sex practices can be incorporated as part of foreplay. A condom or dental dam can be applied in an erotic or playful way as part of the final stages of foreplay. Alternately, couples may select a method of birth control in part because it does not interrupt the progression of foreplay into intercourse, such as the Pill, other forms of hormonal contraception, or the IUD.

Kissing and foreplay

Lovers passionately kissing in a park

Kissing during foreplay may be on the mouth or encompass other areas of the body. Deep kissing, also known as French kissing, involves the physical contact of tongues and can also imply the tongue entering another person's mouth. Other areas for kissing may include the partner's ears, cheek, neck, eyelids, shoulders, breasts, stomach, back, inner thighs or feet.

Most people are quite responsive to manual or oral contact with their pubic area. Men are more responsive to oral stimulation of the underside of the full length of the penis, the head of the penis, the scrotum and the perineum while women find it most exciting when they are orally or manually stimulated on their clitoris, vulva and the surrounding area.

Tantric foreplay

Tantric foreplay is the first step in the lovemaking session according to the tantra principles. Tantric sex is against rushing things for the purpose of reaching an orgasm, so tantric foreplay is a way to prepare the body and the mind for the union between the two bodies and the universe. The tantric rules say that foreplay must be focused on the preparation before sexual intercourse. Tantric foreplay may include sensual baths between the two partners in a relaxing atmosphere. Fragrance oil and candles may also be used to set up the mood.

The tantric foreplay is only about giving each other time to connect spiritually and bind. Staring at each other while in a cross-legged position and touching the other's hand palms is a usual foreplay tactic used by tantra practitioners. Tantric foreplay may also include massages. The massage that is applied, according to the tantric philosophy, has not the purpose to reach orgasms but to give each other pleasure and connect at a spiritual level..

Role of foreplay

Foreplay is important from at least two different considerations, one of them is purely physiological. On the other hand, foreplay implies a certain level of confidence and trust between the partners and creates intimacy.

During foreplay, people become aroused and prepared for sexual intercourse. Mental foreplay includes actions that are intended to provoke sexual excitement. These may consist in stripping in the front of the partner, whispering at the partner's ear, biting or licking one's lips. The physical foreplay involves manual or oral stimulation of the sensitive parts of the body, though the erogenous zones are different with everyone.

Erogenous zones

An erogenous zone is an area of the body that has heightened sensitivity, the stimulation of which may result in the production of erotic sensations or sexual excitement. People have erogenous zones all over their bodies but these areas need to be discovered during foreplay, given that not all have the same sensitive spots. Some may resent stimulation that others find arousing. The stimulation of these areas produces gentle, mild or intense arousal.

The erogenous zones may be classified by the type of sexual excitement that they provoke. Many are gently aroused when their eyelids, eyebrows, templates, shoulders, hands, arms and hair are subtly touched. Gently touching or stroking of these zones stimulates a partner during foreplay and increases the arousal level. Also, the gentle massage or stroke of the abdominal area along with kissing or simply touching the navel can be a type of stimulation.

Foreplay games

Some couples use sexual games to create an interest in the sexual partners for sexual activity. There are numerous games that can be played, either in the home or outside the home, and can range from card games to role playing.

A partner can initiate a sexual game even when the other is still at work. This can involve calling the partner expectantly to give him or her a hint on what you have in mind for the night you are going to spend together. Short erotic SMS work the same way. This will start the partner fantasizing about the forthcoming encounter. People who work in an office can use the computer for chatting online with their partner. Erotic chat builds up sexual tension, even though there is no chance of intimacy. However, some may even like the fact that there is no intimacy.

A man bound and blindfolded

When a card or board game is played for foreplay, a sensuous atmosphere can be enhanced by candles, drinks and sensual food. The objective of the game is for the partners to indulge their fantasies. The loser can, for example, be required to remove clothing or give the winner a sensual foot massage or any other thing that the winner wants to try.

Body painting can be used to explore and stimulate a partner's body and erogenous zones. Body paint is available in a variety of paints and types. There are water based body paints and eatable body paints.

For some couples sexual arousal may be created by watching erotic and pornography videos together. Other practices can involve use of sex toys, or for one person to erotically strip for the other. Some couples play games involving sexual bondage and blindfolding. Even the suggestion of such activities is enough to create sexual interest.

Role playing may involve the partners wearing costumes, to create and maintain a sexual fantasy. As a variation, the partners can make up a (sexual) story together. One of them starts with a sentence and then the other continues until the story becomes sexually explicit, and it provides an opportunity for the partners to express their sexual fantasies. 'Strangers for a day' is a role playing game which consists of the couple playing roles of the first meeting between them. In a public meeting place, the partners pretend to be strangers meeting for the first time. The objective is for them to flirt and seduce the other, without doing or saying anything that they normally would not do or say at a first meeting.

Function and effects

Psychologically, foreplay lowers inhibitions and increases the emotional comfort of the partners. Physically, it stimulates the process that produces an erection in men, allowing them to penetrate an orifice. In women, it helps stimulate the process that leads to erection of the clitoris, raising of the cervix (elongation of the vaginal canal), and the production of vaginal lubrication, allowing penetration to take place comfortably and effectively.

When a woman becomes sexually aroused as a result of foreplay the blood flow to the genital area is increased causing the engorgement of the genital tissue (the clitoris and labia). The vaginal wall dilates and also, the vagina becomes elongated. Foreplay is so important for women due to the fact that it provokes sexual excitement which produces an excretion of fluid across the vaginal wall which results in lubrication.

Foreplay has important physical and psychological effects on women, but maybe the latter is slightly more important. The biggest issue related to the ability of achieving orgasms is thought to be solved with the right foreplay techniques.

However, the subject of the effectiveness of foreplay continues to be a point of discussion. An example of this is a European survey of 2,300 women in Prague showed that foreplay is not the key in a satisfactory sexual act. Instead "the duration of intercourse – 16.2 minutes on average – is the clincher".

Research

Foreplay can vary dramatically based on age, religion, and cultural norms. In spite of the clichéd modern folklore that women demand more foreplay and require more time to become physically aroused, recent scientific research refutes that myth. Scientists from McGill University Health Centre in Montreal, Canada used the method of thermal imaging to record baseline temperature change in the genital area as the definition of the time necessary for sexual arousal. Researchers studied the time required for an individual to reach the peak of sexual arousal and concluded that, on average, women and men spend almost the same time for sexual arousal — around 10 minutes. This, however, does not take into account the amount of time necessary to become mentally aroused.

See also

• BDSM
• Cunnilingus
• Erogenous zone
• Fellatio
• Footsie, the 'feet under the table' practice
• Making out
• Orgasm control
• Outercourse
• Sexual intercourse
• Venus Butterfly