Jump to content

Talk:Edina Müller

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Good articleEdina Müller has been listed as one of the Sports and recreation good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Article milestones
DateProcessResult
February 19, 2013Good article nomineeListed
Did You Know
A fact from this article appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the "Did you know?" column on February 15, 2013.
The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that Edina Müller (pictured) was part of a team that was awarded the Silver Laurel Leaf, Germany's highest sporting honour, in 2012?

GA Review

[edit]
This review is transcluded from Talk:Edina Müller/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sarastro1 (talk · contribs) 22:31, 18 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • "She played for ASV Bonn in the German wheelchair basketball league, and for the national team which won bronze at the 2006 World Cup in Amsterdam, was three time European champions (2007, 2009, 2011), silver medallists at the 2008 Summer Paralympics in Beijing, and gold medallists at the 2012 Summer Paralympics in London.": Horribly long sentence, which really needs cutting up.
  • I think the parts about the team winning the awards in 2008 and 2012 needs smoothing a little. It currently jumps from Muller to the team without a link. Perhaps a simple phrase such as "Two of Muller's teams won awards for…" or adding "of which Muller was part" to the sentences.
  • "her legs fell asleep" seems too informal for this. Could it be made more "medical". Also, was there a reason for her paraplegia? And as written, there is a slight (and probably unintentional hint) that the straightening of her back played a part.
  • "During the semester break, she travelled with the women's national team for tournaments and preparation camps. In 2007, the German women became European champions in their own country, at Wetzlar.": Presumably she travelled with the German women's national team, but from the previous sentences it could possibly refer to the US team.
  • "but was beaten by former teammates and opponents from the United States": This seems a little odd. Perhaps something like the winning team contained "former teammates…"?
  • General points: Each paragraph really should start with "Müller", rather than a pronoun such as "she" or "her".
  • There seem to be a few too many sentence beginning with "she", which makes for repetitive reading. This aspect should be polished a little.
  • Everything else seems OK prose-wise.
  • Speaking no German, I cannot check the sources, so I will have to AGF on these. Given the nominators record at GA and FA, I'm happy enough not to need any spot-checks, but feel that I should point out that none have been done. (Other than rudimentary google translate ones!)
  • Images, dablinks and external links check out. Sourcing looks Ok as far as I can tell.

Looks good overall, and just these minor prose issues to sort out. Shouldn't be any problems, and I'll place this on hold for now. Sarastro1 (talk) 22:40, 18 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Good stuff; passing now. Sarastro1 (talk) 11:45, 19 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]
[edit]

Hello fellow Wikipedians,

I have just modified one external link on Edina Müller. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:

When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.

This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

  • If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
  • If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.

Cheers.—InternetArchiveBot (Report bug) 15:10, 9 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]