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Kam (from Sanskrit kama) meaning deep extensive desire, uncontrolled longing, concupiscence, sensuality or lasciviousness is counted among the five cardinal sins or sinful propensities in Sikhism. In common usage, the term stands for excessive passion for sexual pleasure and it is in this sense that it is considered to be an evil in Sikhism.
Sikh Guru teachings
The Gurus rejected lust. Yet they recognized the four purusarthas, referred to in gurbani as char Padaraths or the four human pursuits as the Granth Sahib declares "Dharma, Artha, Kam and Moksha follow God's devotee like shadow" (SGGS 1320). However, in Sikhism, Kam is not unrestricted gratification of carnal desires, but an impulse which needs to be kept under check like other impulses and passions. Unrestrained propensity towards Kam, especially sexual relationship outside the marital bond, is condemned in the strongest terms in Sikh codes of conduct as well as in the Scripture. It is a destructive evil and a deadly sin. Kam is heavily discouraged as it "can build barriers against God in their lives".
To quote Guru Arjan, Nanak V: “O Kam, thou landest people in hell and makest them wander through many births, enticest all minds, swayest all the three worlds and undoest one's meditation, austerities and restraint. The pleasure is ephemeral and thou afflictest high and low alike " (GG, 1358). Guru Tegh Bahadur Nanak IX, says: "In the sinning heart reigns kam and the fickle mind breaks out of control. Kam casts its noose even upon yogis, jangams and sannyasis. Only those imbued with God's Name (fall not a prey to it) and are able to go across the ocean of existence" (GG, 1186). Bhai Gurdas describes an ideal Sikh as one who is loyal to his wife and "regards all other women as mothers, sisters and daughters" (Varan, XXIX. 11). Guru Gobind Singh also said: "Love your own wedded wife ever so more, but do not go to another woman's bed even in a dream." Sikh codes of conduct strictly prohibit extramarital relations.
While prescribing self-control and restraint and not total annihilation of kam, the Gurus suggested two ways of channelizing and sublimating it. On the one hand, they pronounced grihastha or married life to be the ideal one, and, on the other laid down love of God and absorption in His Name as the essential principle of spiritual discipline. Says Guru Gobind Singh "Hear ye all, I proclaim here the truth: only they who love God find Him." The image of a devotee most common in Sikh Scripture is one of a wife deeply in love with her husband presently separated from him, and waiting, craving, praying for a reunion with him. Such fervent devotion cannot but bridle the wayward passion in man. According to Guru Arjan, a person who has cultivated the love of the Lord’s feet would desire neither kingship, worldly power, or even mukti or liberation (GG 534).
- Majupuria, Trilok (2004). Religions in Nepal: With Reference to Religions of Tibet and India. p. 292.
- Sevartham, Volume 31. St. Albert's College. p. 48.